7/23/06: Gabriel and Julian's REAL heat wave

Forgive me Blogfather, for I have sinned: it's been weeks since my last confession. Our trip back East and various other things have conspired against me, but now I feel the urge to spew once again.

It is hot. Hot Hot Hot here in the Bay Area. We're not used to Tucson weather around here, except for the expectation that things will cool down at night. But even that hasn't happened: it's only gotten down to 70 or so the past two nights, not letting our house cool down enough. Our upstairs air conditioner has been on full-time, but is losing its battle against the temperature.

Normally being as pregnant as I am, this heat would be miserable, but I have plenty of other complaints to overshadow the heat (back fatigue, sciatic pain, and as always, the relentless gastric issues). And nonstop poking, prodding, kicking, bumping, pushing -- from all three children! The boys get me from the outside, and the baby from the inside: constantly climbing the walls in there. If it weren't a baby doing it, it'd be downright annoying. It's hard to say if this baby is as active as Gabriel was, since one really never remembers exactly, but if it's not more, then it's close. Julian I felt a lot too, but his motions were stretchier, not so much flip-floppy. This feels like one bony baby, too.
Friday after picking the boys up from Tonya's, I took them to our community pool. I'd been considering cancelling our membership, since it's expensive for something I rarely use, but it's turned out to be great for them.


Julian can touch the bottom in the entire shallow end of the pool, making it much easier for me to play with them since I don't have to hold and catch him the entire time. This time, Dave joined us, so I was able to take some pictures of Gabriel jumping in the water and swimming across the short side of the pool. He loved that!

After swimming, we went to Spoons for dinner -- yes, out to dinner again. Incredibly, both boys were really good. For once, being tired and hungry worked in our favor: they peacefully ate, then Gabriel rested on my lap. They were wiped out.

Saturday we went to Dave's company picnic, at, of all places in the midst of a brutal heat wave, the Beach Boardwalk in Santa Cruz. About the last place I want to be on a hot day is a crowded amusement park, but Santa Cruz being by the ocean was cooler (though still very hot), and right on the beach! Julian has never been to a beach.

After a few kiddie rides and lunch, we went to the beach which was also very crowded. And the water cold -- despite the heat, people just don't play in the surf the way we did as kids at Jones Beach. It gets deep fast, it is pretty cold, and the surf is a lot less predictable.


Nevertheless, Gabriel got into the groove running from the surf (until he fell in), and Julian got over his initial reluctance with a circle running game.

The one thing I underestimated was the draw of the sand: their favorite thing was trying to make sand castles. Time to try a nice safe lake beach for them!

In other news, after 6 straight nights of a wet bed, Gabriel finally kept his bed dry last night, though with a lot of help. Dave's been waking Gabriel up to go, right before we go to bed, which hasn' t been helping. That's been discouraging: no signs of progress at all, except that Gabriel has gotten more used to, and more agreeable about, getting woken up to go. Many people would suggest that he's just not ready, but his new resistance to night-training and his saying "I wanted to sleep but the pee-pee wouldn't listen to me, so I went" tells me he's aware of it, making conscious decisions, and is starting to think of peeing in his bed as his birthright. So it's time. That kid has amazing control, even though he's also a heavy sleeper.

But last night Dave woke him up twice, but most importantly: Gabriel got up himself to go once early this morning, then back to bed. No doubt being taken to the toilet helped that happen, but it's an important first step. Gabriel was proud of being dry this morning, and of course we made a big deal of it. Despite all the laundry, neither Dave or I are anywhere near ready to give up. My sense is that this isn't a bladder maturity thing with him, he's ready.

And, today, Sunday July 23rd, we're starting a potty-training experiment with Julian! So far, when we take him to the potty and persuade him to try to go, he goes, though he also just pees without telling us. Still, I'm ready to give it a fighting shot. We're doing lots of laundry for Gabriel anyway, after all.

Today it's once again brutally hot, though we're a little better prepared. Dave lowered the A/C temp upstairs and ran it all night, and now we're using a big fan to pull some cool air from upstairs to the downstairs, making a big difference down here. It's only 80 instead of 90! The boys are outside playing in a backyard sprinkler; I can't imagine how to keep them indoors even on a day like this. I recall my friend Tom's mother describing summer in Tucson (where Tom lives): it's like winter in Long Island. You just stay inside in the summer (though in Tucson, you do have a little time in the morning before 9am). That's what it's like right now. Whew!

29 weeks along today. My friend Helen, due in late September with her 2nd boy, says at 30 weeks you can start the countdown. It can't come soon enough for me!

Oh, how could I forget, such a nice moment: Saturday when we went to Santa Cruz, I wore a blue flowered maternity shirt that has a little lace trim and ruffled sleeves (very unlike me). And I got such a nice compliment from my #1 guy: "I like your pretty shirt, Mommy." Dave told me later that Gabriel told him that as well. Such a surprise coming from my all-boy firstborn, but how nice.

7/23/06

6/23/06 Gabriel and Julian's heat wave

It's been HOT the past few days! Really unusually hot, so much so that I close all the doors and windows downstairs during the day, then open them all up at night. Usually it's the other way around. It still cools off at night, but it's been warm enough in the evenings to stand outside comfortable in tank top and shorts.

Last Tuesday (June 19) we didn't have swim class, so I took the boys to the Cupertino fountains to cool off. Even though we'd been to the much louder and more intimidating Los Gatos fountains two days before, Julian would still have nothing to do with them. I don't know what happened, he liked fountains last year!
Gabriel, on the other hand, played in them nonstop, having a fabulous time. Gina was his usual cohort, but he also played with Erin and another boy we don't know, who showed him how to sit on the fountain and direct the water with his legs, which he found hilarious.


Lucky me, I got to sit in the shade with a reticent Julian and chat with my Mom friends, though Julian did relax later when one of my friends rolled a ball to him. But it was way too hot to be running after a ball, and within minutes, he was all flushed.
Even after stopping for a few bites of lunch, Gabriel went back out to play in the water. Oddly, in the pool, lately Gabriel has been pooping out before Julian, but not in fountains -- especially when Julian won't go near them. What is his deal?!

Thursday the 22nd, I had a horrible morning, I was unrecoverably exhausted and just couldn't function. Dave's been out of town, so I've had to get up at 6:30am with Julian, and it's killing me -- I HATE being up early, it ruins my day. I stumbled through dressing and breakfast for the boys, falling asleep with every blink of my eyes, and tried to put my head down sitting on a chair, but I got interrupted again and again and again. No surprise; two little boys need constant intervention. It was so frustrating that just 20 minutes was all I needed to take the edge off. And I'd easily have had that if I had just Gabriel or Julian, but as usual, both together means even a few seconds to run upstairs to rotate laundry is risky.

I finally resorted to something I've never done once: putting on a video just so I could rest. But I felt so bad about that that I couldn't sleep! I got up and saw them zoned out on the couch, on a hot summer morning, and I felt terrible about how I'd been -- grumpy, impatient, shouting, trying to ignore them. I was finally awake, so I got a whole bunch of things together, then took them to the Y where I did a little weights work and swam, and they had lunch.

Then I took them to our local pool to cool off, and that was so much fun. I was delighted to discover that Julian can stand up in the shallow end of the pool, which meant I didn't have to hold him the whole time or pull him out of over-his-head water every 5 seconds. This made it much more fun for me; I could splash around and play with them, go underwater and chase them and relax a lot more. Gabriel kept practicing swimming back and forth between the steps and the shallow end, but he wanted to get out much sooner than Julian did. In fact, I was so busy playing with them that I didn't get any pictures -- odd for me!

That night, what a treat for me: I asked Peggy to come over and take care of the boys while I attended my last skating class (sniff!). The ice rink was a wonderful place to be on such a hot day. And I almost sort-of got some momentum on doing back crossovers, which had been my main goal. I really want to find a way to keep skating and keep learning. Maybe the key is Peggy, actually: she was competitive as a teenager and practiced every day, and the rink I've been going to even asked her to teach. So who knows, maybe we can go to skating outings and I can ask her to help me with the baby and give me some pointers! Of course, she'll have her hands full with her own baby, due in August, though Peggy is never rattled by multiple children or babies, not like me.

But now, it's Friday night, and I have less than 24 hours to gather a zillion odds and ends for our trip tomorrow. The boys are really excited about going on an airplane (though Julian says he wants to go on a helicopter instead), and I will be too once I'm ready!

6/18/06 Gabriel and Julian's Father's Day

Happy Father's Day!

Actually, I got the first treat: sleeping until **10:20** AM! More proof that you can never, ever turn a true night person into a morning person. Plus I'm shaking off days in a row of exceptionally poor sleep, especially last Friday when I had one of the worst stomach days I've had in weeks. I finally took some codeine late in the day, and it mercifully made me groggy until well into Saturday. Thanks for the sleep boost, Dad.

After I finally got up this morning, I kicked into gear and made a big bang-up breakfast. Then we gave Dave his Father's Day presents, which were a scrapbook page I made of his Rallycross weekend, and a pair of studio photos of me and the boys wearing their father's shirt, for his office. (Dave wore this blue plaid shirt the day Gabriel was born, then put it on for Julian's birth, and wears it on their birthdays.) He didn't say much, but I think he liked it.

Then, of course, the best Father's Day present: some time off! It's been hot this weekend, so I took the boys to the fountains in Los Gatos.

Last year, it took some coaxing to get Julian into the water spurts, when he had just barely started walking. This year, he wouldn't go near them! He was quite content to sit in the shade and watch all the other kids, including many much younger than he is, zoom through the fountains. (Note the ever-present crossed feet: am I the only one who thinks this habit is relentlessly adorable?)
Gabriel has never had any issues with water and wasted no time running like mad through the fountains and getting soaking wet. I had fun chasing him around and going through myself too, once again one of the very few grownups willing to get wet (odd since it really has been hot today!).

Gabriel got cold after a while and then was content to sit wrapped in a towel and have an apple snack with his timid brother.

Driving to Los Gatos was the first test run of having the boys sit right next to each other in carseats. This could be the downfall of our plan to keep the Outback: fighting. They did start in at one point, but I managed to control it with very stern and very sincere warnings. It seems to help if I follow it up with a very horrified-sounding voice about how dangerous it is to fight while I'm driving. Certainly Julian takes it seriously.

I remember Dad (my Dad) turning around to whack me on the head while he was driving when I was a kid, and those visions come to mind when I think about how mad I'll get if they fight (mostly, Gabriel hurting Julian while he's helpless). But I also remember how much I hated that, and that mostly it made me resentful and not think at all about whatever offense I committed. I wonder what I did to deserve that; I know it wasn't from fighting (Ronan always sat next to me and I didn't physically fight with him much). Still, if there's one thing you learn from being a parent, it's that others never know the whole story, so I've learned to be a lot less judgmental of other parents. Even mine. Seems fitting on Father's Day!

Gabriel and Julian spent a lot of time with Dad this morning, helping him wash his car as I slept in. It's especially a big treat to get to hold the hose. Then when we got home from the fountains, Gabriel rushed to help Dave with yardwork (the boys absolutely love their time with Dad in the yard) while I coaxed a reluctant Julian upstairs for his nap. Then, guess what I did -- I took a nap! When I woke up, I found Gabriel and Dave snuggled up together on the couch, also napping. Nothing like a family-wide afternoon nap on Father's Day!

6/18/06

6/17/06 Gabriel and Julian get weighed

It was time...this weekend was the big experiment with carseats in the back of my car. Also, I needed to decide which carseat or booster I'd bring with me on our upcoming trip back East.

To that end, I bought a backless booster seat, rated for 40 pounds, 40 inches, and 3 years old, of which Gabriel only meets the age criteria. I know other people who've used these for travel even though their kids didn't quite fit that, and saw another similar-looking seat rated for a lower weight, so brought it home with the intention of consulting Dave.

This led to actually measuring and weighing Gabriel. And some of our dilemma is removed! His stats:

Gabriel at four and a half: 39-7/8". 32 pounds (pathetic!).

Julian at two and a half: I didn' t measure his height. 29 pounds.

So, Gabriel is close enough to 40" to call him such, and that will help feel better about using boosters. Really, weight is pretty irrelevant at this age (according to our pediatrician, it did matter for forward-facing him when he was 19 months old and still not 20 pounds) -- it's height and where the seatbelt falls on the child's shoulder that matters. But the laws about carseats mostly use weight. Another example where safety and legality aren't always in line.

Dave's first experiments with carseats in the Outback didn't look good. He had a hard time getting a carseat, a convertible harness/booster seat, and an infant seat installed -- you can sit them all in there, but actually installing securely changes how they all fit together. And, of course, there's no LATCH in the middle.

But then, Dave discovered that our gigantic-looking Britax Marathon actually fits in better than the narrow (we thought) Graco carseat we'd planned for Julian, since the Marathon is narrower at the top. Just as well, because the Graco carseat is intended for smaller toddlers and is rated up to 40 pounds, just like the Britax Roundabout that Julian is in, and Julian's head is now just a little higher than the top of the Roundabout. It's even possible that he's now technically too tall for it, though he's quite safe in it. Still, Gabriel had been in the Marathon for months by the time he was Julian's age. It's time to rotate these guys.

We decided to also get a booster seat with a back, especially since it turns out to convert to a backless booster anyway, to see if that will work. Gabriel really really wants a real seatbelt anyway, he tells me every time he straps himself into the Marathon. (A booster seat isn't installed, it just boosts them up a little and they use the car's seatbelt, not a built-in 5-point harness. The law and safety ratings are actually pretty unclear about when a child can go to a booster seat, especially when you can buy a backless booster that claims to be rated down to 1 year old!)


Finally, here's what we ended up with. We CAN cram 3 carseats into the back of the Outback, but not with a booster, since it'd be very difficult to reach the seatblet latch. The Britax Marathon, the convertible carseat/booster (in carseat mode), and the rear-facing infant seat all fit. In fact, Dave tried replacing the rear-facing infant seat with the Britax Roundabout (rear-facing) and that fit too. Wow! There's some overlap, and it's tight, but it's doable.

For my East Coast trip, I'll bring the convertible carseat/booster for Julian, and the backless booster for Gabriel. Though the back of a booster does help position the seatbelt strap so it's more comfortable, so maybe I'll see if I can fit the backful booster in the carseat bag along with Julian's carseat.

I'll be so glad someday when we're done with carseats and boosters. That won't be until at least 2012!

6/17/06

6/14/06 Gabriel and Julian sing

I'm getting more and more comments about Gabriel singing all the time! Today it was his former teacher at Kids Inc, who said another mom asked about him humming and singing as he plays. The teacher noticed it too. Our next-door neighbor also asked too, and on and off I've heard other comments too. Of course, most kids like to sing, but I'm getting enough comments from various sources that makes me think that Gabriel does it more than most kids, at least, around other people. At home, he sings to himself ALL the time as he's playing.

Thing is, he really didn't start doing that until Julian did. Julian actually sings more, and more creatively. Julian answers questions in song sometimes, or he'll make up new words to a tune, or make up a song altogether, or just sing something he knows while he's in the car. They sing together quite a bit, sometimes not even looking at each other, just singing along while they work on something. Other times, they make up a song and words and laugh together as they work it out.

It's only now dawning on me that it might be more prevalent in them than many of their peers. It reminds me of when Gabriel was a toddler and I'd tell people he liked to spin things, and most would answer that their toddler did too. But I realized later that Gabriel really really liked to spin things and did it far, far more than most other kids (to the point that it was a flag for PDD, Pervasive Development Disorder). Similarly with his lengthy and frequent tantrums, it took some years before I connected that I was living in a different tantrum world than most other moms. And so now with singing, I'm starting to wonder if Gabriel and Julian individually, and together, really sing quite a lot (where "a lot" means relative to typical little-kid singing). So I wonder if I should put them in a boys' chorus or something? In any case, it's a delightful, sweet characteristic. Not every talent or interest HAS to be followed up with a class, of course.

Last weekend, Dave was away at a Rallycross school on Saturday, and a competition on Sunday, at Thunderhill racetrack in Willows, CA. He talked our friend Paul into going, which meant great pictures. (That's Dave driving with an instructor in the car with him.)


Meanwhile, I went scrapbooking with my friends on Saturday, but first took Julian to his usual soccer class. Sunday, my mom's group had a picnic and I took the boys there, along with some Rice Krispies treats that Gabriel "helped" me make. Gabriel had a great time on this turning play structure, that my mom friend Sandy and her husband Cliff spent a lot of time turning kids on -- I think they were having more fun than the kids! Naturally, Gabriel was surrounded by girls. He seems to prefer that!Of course, Julian found a ball (also Sandy's), though was fascinated by Cassie playing in some dumped-out ice.





While we were at the park last Sunday, Julian came to me and said he had to "go poops," to my surprise. His poop training is back on track at home, but rarely if he's outside. This time, he was at a fun, distracting park and had to come find me to tell me. Good for him! After our June-July trip East, or perhaps even during, it's underpants time for him. I'd do it now, except I really don't want to deal with a new potty-trainer on a trip, in unfamiliar surroundings, airplanes, long car trips, etc. I've got to get him some fun underpants, that sort of incentive will go a long way. Gabriel still has the first set of underpants I ever got him (the Nemos), which he's had for almost 2 years now. They still fit fine, and are holding up great (Hanes), but do look a little dingy by now.

Yesterday morning, Julian came into our bedroom while I was just getting up, and climbed onto the bed and under the covers to join me. "I come seep with you," he said, then "I get under banket, there, all tuck in. You on dat side, I on dis side. We all tuck in under banket, both together." This sort of monologue is very typical of him, a play-by-play as he goes about some little task. Just about every day, I'm surprised to hear some new term from him -- not just vocabulary, but concepts, like "both" and "together." I really shouldn't be surprised; he's been saying things like that for months, but there's so much of it I have to remind myself he's only 2-1/2 and many of his 2004 peers are still just putting words together.

His excellent language completely changes how I interact with him as compared to Gabriel at this age, who was just starting to say a few words. I think of Julian as a much older kid, much less a baby, and have little conversations with him, consult him on things, explain things to him. I did with Gabriel too, but on a much different level because I didn't get any feedback. Julian also remembers things, nothing like his cousin Aidan, but this morning he commented that he has a baby in his tummy. I explained that only mommies have babies in their tummies, but I was surprised that he remembered this from a few days back. I shouldn't be, really, but Gabriel is only now coming out of his strong tendency to live and think entirely in the present, so I'm more used to that. Of course, I know that by the time he's in preschool, his peers will have caught up; really, there's really no long-term meaning to having been language-advanced, but it sure does make for a very different toddler experience. Then again, so does having a moderately sensitive, agreeable toddler!

Are Gabriel and Julian going to be the next hit brother singing act? :)

6/14/06

6/12/06 Mom falls behind

Bad blogger! Bad blogger! I know, I know, there's no need to "keep up," but wasn't that why I started this? The urge is certainly still there, but it seems that opportunity to write conflicts with bouts of feeling horrible. Or, feeling so well that I don't feel like sitting and writing.

Not last night. It took hours to be able to lie down without intense stomach pain, and then only after I gave in and took a tylenol with codeine. At dinner, there was nonstop relentless pressure on my stomach from what felt like gas, but who knows. In some ways, October seems so close, like in terms of getting our upstairs finished by then...but in other ways, October seems SO far away, like if I'm going to suffer for four solid months again!

At least the past few weeks I've been keeping a pretty good exercise regimen. Monday mornings I try to swim a little, usually only having time for 10-15 minutes, but then I go to the fitness room and stretch, do pushups, and a little bit of weights. Then Monday nights, I try to get to prenatal yoga. Tuesdays and Thursdays, more swimming, stretching, pushups and weights. Wednesdays, conditioning class at my longtime gym. Fridays, Ballecore (combination of ballet, yoga and pilates). And, of course, Thursday nights, skating, though I only have two more classes. Saturday mornings...I try to swim at the Y also, but that's dicey, since the Childwatch doesn't open until 8:30, but the lap swim closes at 8:55, so it's a pretty small window. (Dave takes Julian to soccer, and I bring Gabriel to the Y with me.)

Last Thursday, my friend Beth (who can actually skate) met me at the rink and we skated together after my class. She got a few pictures of my class, though the lighting in there makes for horrible photos. Here we are learning "spirals", really just an arabesk on skates (that's me all the way on the right). I'm really stuck on backward crossovers, that's what I most wanted to learn and I just can't do it!

Gabriel and Julian have been pretty good lately, for them, though rambunctious. They had an unusual weekend in that Dave went away for the weekend for a Rallycross class, so they got grumpy, sick me to themselves! Still, the weekend was rescued by the fact that I had a scrapbooking date with my mom pals, so I got Peggy to take care of the boys on Saturday. They were SO excited to see her, and waited for her on the front porch. Peggy left during Julian's nap, and when he woke up, he said on and off for hours, "I'm sad because Peggy's gone," then he'd forget she was gone and wander around the house calling, "Peggy, where ARE you?!". I'm sad that Peggy is expecting her 2nd baby in August and I'll probably won't call on her around then, though she never says no. Of course, I'm very happy for her, she's a great mom. I wish I could be 1/100th as calm as she is.

Two mornings ago, Julian came into our bedroom while I was still in bed, and piped, "Hi, Mommy!" Then, "let me see your hands....hey, your fingers are too long!".

Gabriel came out with something yesterday in the bathtub about having a baby in his tummy. I chuckled and told him no, only Mommies have babies in their tummies. "Not Daddies?!" he said genuinely.

Other times, he sees me chewing gum and asks me about it, and I tell him it's icky, it's only to get bad tastes out of my mouth, because I'm going to have a baby. Then he asked once, "Is the gum going to make the baby come out?". Oh, if only!

Julian pulled a plastic bag out of a crate where I keep them (in his reach, I'm sorry to say), and wanted to play with it over his head. Though I doubt he'd suffocate, it's just not a good idea, so I suggested a paper bag instead. Then, following Stephanie's lead, I cut eyeholes out for him. This turned into making the boys "masks," which they were delighted with. Julian stomps around in big steps, making growling sounds, and calls himself a monster. Amazing how easy it is to please little kids with a little creativity (which is about all I have!)

Lots more to tell, but I've got to go have breakfast.

6/12/06

5/30/06 Gabriel picks a strange place for a nap

Today was the first in what I hope is a new routine: before swim class, I prepare the boys' lunches, then we go to swim class, then to the Y where I set them up in their respective Childwatch rooms, then I go swim. Yay! And I did that. I had to cut my swim short for an initiation meeting with a fitness instructor, but I'm still so glad I got in 20 minutes.

The boys had such a good time in the Y's Childwatch that I had a hard time getting them to leave. They seem to think of it as a fun new playground. One of the Childwatchers said she was teaching Julian to read, apparently delighted in how enthusiastically he responded to a book with photos of objects with the words. (He certainly isn't reading of course, but he likes to point to a word and ask you to read it. Other than a pretty wide vocabulary his age, I doubt he's all that unusual, but maybe this lady really wants to be a preschool teacher.)

Julian has been pushing the discipline envelope lately (Gabriel always does, but that's another story). A few days ago, he was being particularly disagreeable about going upstairs for a nap, fighting me every step of the way, resisting my grand efforts at making it fun and getting him to cooperate. I had to change his diaper, and he fussed and screamed about his pants coming off, tried to keep me from taking off his diaper, and generally was being very aggressive and difficult (with a pretty nasty diaper, I might add -- he needed to be still!). Then he took to trying to kick me, and I'd had it: I smacked his knee with my hand, and said sternly, "That's ENOUGH! No kicking!". He screamed in surprise and pain, kicked me again, and got smacked again. This time, he cried in pain and sadness, and immediately capitulated and asked for hugs, which he got, for a long time. After that, he was peaches and cream, sobbing just a little, but being very cooperative. By the time I took him into his room, the storm had passed and he was his delightful self again.

Now, I know the anti-spanking advocates would say that I should instead have firmly told him, "We don't kick!" but really. I get asked from time to time "Do you spank?" as though I would have some developed philosophy about spanking. I don't. Indeed, almost all my philosophies about parenting, if I have any at all, are entirely practical. I don't spank as a matter of policy, but I don't avoid it as a matter of policy either. And it's pretty hard to ignore the practical effects of cutting short a nasty, out-of-control behavior rampage. There's no question that an occasional well-placed smack curtails a long, drawn-out, painful episode with Julian, making it easier on all of us, even him. (Gabriel....forget it. See previous reference to "practical.")

Today Julian went down for a nap without much drama. I checked on Gabriel, told him I was going to take a nap, and went to lie down. I can't believe how tired I am in the afternoons, and how physically impaired I already am from my burgeoning tummy -- and that's at only 21 weeks along! After a pretty good snooze, I woke up and recognized the usual silence: Gabriel had gone to sleep.

I looked quickly around downstairs and didn't see him, and figured he'd gone upstairs to his room. So I had a snack and read the paper, did a few things in the kitchen...then noticed the oddest bulge under the slipcover on family room couch. I guess Gabriel had been stuffing things under there, I wonder what...so I lifted it up and found -- Gabriel! He'd curled up under the slipcover and gone to sleep! I'm glad I noticed that before checking his room and finding him absent -- I'd really have wondered where he'd gone! That kid naps anywhere.

Later, after dinner, Gabriel helped me make a pumpkin buttermilk pudding (yum!). I'm getting better and better at giving him baking tasks, and he can "help" me with just about every step: buttering the pan, pouring dry or wet ingredients in (I help him measure though), mixing -- he's even learning to crack eggs. He gets a huge kick out of this, and I like it too, it's a nice way to spend time together.

Meanwhile, I could hear Julian singing in the living room, and checked on him after we'd finished the pudding. Julian was engaging in a very Gabriel-like activity: lining pillows up on the floor! I think he was imitating the docks he'd seen when we went pedalboating. The boys had fun walking along the pillow-dock. I still haven't had the heart to put the pillows away, it's so cute.

A challenging day with them in many ways, but a full and rich one.

5/30/06

5/29/06 Gabriel and Julian pedal a boat

Today we went on a surprisingly rare family outing. Somehow on the weekends are always too busy around the house, or I take the boys somewhere without Dave on Sundays. But today on a holiday Monday, we went to Shoreline Park in Mountain View to take a "pedalboat" out onto the sailing lake.

I'd seen this in April when I took the boys to Shoreline just to check it out, and today was perfect to actually go out onto the lake. It was a slightly breezy day, sparing us from what could be a very hot time out there.

Except for the parking lots, that is. Packed! Shoreline is a popular place. Once we found a place to park, it was smooth sailing from there.

It was fun! For $16, we rented a boat and lifevests for an hour, and pedaled around Shoreline's manmade sailing lake. We saw lots of other boats, including windsurfers and a sailboat that a man and his young daughter had capsized.
Julian was afraid at first, but once he got to hold the steering wheel, he relaxed. Gabriel was excited from the beginning and also liked steering and trying to pedal (he couldn't reach very well). We watched some windsurfers zooming by, looked at a few birds, rescued a hat for another family, then pedaled back to the docks.

What a great way to spend a holiday afternoon.

5/29/06

5/28/06 Gabriel and Julian go to a pool party

Today we went to a Memorial Weekend (since it wasn't actually Memorial Day) pool party at the house of one of Dave's coworkers. They have a beautiful house in Los Altos, with a pool and hot tub in the backyard, and kids welcome. Gabriel helped me make pumpkin bread to bring (he loves to help me bake), and we arrived around 12:30 for the party.

It was chilly and windy the day before, but today was pretty nice. We got the boys ready to get in the pool, but didn't let them in until I was ready too. It's times like this I'm so glad they've had swim classes, because they're comfortable and happy in the water, and I'm very in touch with their abilities and dangers. So, I hung out next to the pool watching them while they played at first, then later got in myself to play with them. Gabriel wasn't allowed onto a big floatable dinosaur until he demonstrated that he could swim across the short end of the pool, and he passed.

One time, before I was in the water with them, Julian stepped off into water too deep for him, and I saw right away that he wasn't going to get back on his own, but I also knew how much time he had. He took about 4 breaths while I got to him and pulled him out, he coughed once or twice, then went on as usual. I think a few onlookers were a little alarmed, perhaps mostly at my cavalier attitude about it! Well, not that cavalier: at the time, I wasn't worried at all, but later that night, the image of Julian paddling to keep his head above water haunted me. Drowning is a silent death, and a few more seconds of that and he'd have been in serious trouble. Will there ever be a time in which my head is turned just a few moments too long? Not this time.

While Dave and I sat by the pool and watched the boys, a little girl got in with an inflatable ring. Dave commented that her parents seemed nowhere to be found, but I said a parent could be anywhere nearby, we couldn't tell. The girl was about 6 years old, maybe she was a trustworthy swimmer too. Inflatable toys in pools make me especially nervous -- kids can easily drift in over their heads and get into trouble. We weren't allowed to play on those truck inntertubes (and what FUN those were!) until we passed a swimming test. But maybe by that girl's age you stop being ultra diligent?

Well, it turned out that her parents indeed were nowhere to be found -- they were inside the house getting a tour. And, it turned out she couldn't swim at all and seemed to depend on the toy inflatable ring to keep her up. I was really shocked. If swim lessons have given me nothing else, it's much better awareness/paranoia of water danger than most parents seem to have. If the parents had asked us to keep an eye on her, that'd have been fine -- but let a 6-year-old into a pool, unsupervised, using an inflatable ring, and who can't swim, is really...well, unaware, I'll say. They seemed like very nice parents otherwise, I'm sure they thought she was safe, especially since she had the ring. Meanwhile, anyone who witnessed Julian's step into the deep would probably think we were the ones being too loosey-goosey.

To my amazement, Gabriel got cold first and then got out first -- that never happens! I found a water frisbee that skips nicely, and played catch with Julian in the water. His lips were blue and he was shivering, but he was having such a good time that he put up a huge fuss when we finally pulled him out of the water -- at 2:30pm and he hadn't had lunch or nap yet. Mom once said that we Berry kids were like that too, shivering and freezing but still insisting on playing in the water. That's-a-my boy! They had a great time at the party, and so did we. Very nice people.

Dinner has really gotten to be annoying with the boys; they're constantly making obnoxious noises, bad behavior, timeouts...we barely squeaked through Sunday night's dinner with things intact enough to watch Thomas the Tank Engine. But I like watching it with them too, so I'm glad they finally shaped up.

5/28/06

5/25/06 Gabriel and Julian join the Y

I promised myself when I started this blog that I wouldn't get compulsive and try to catch up if I was falling behind, but it's pretty hard to squelch the documenter's disease. Though I'm trying to banish this motion, I still find myself feeling that I'm "falling behind." Silly! There will be lots of undocumented moments in our children's lives, and that's OK!

Today after the boys' swim class, I took them to the nearby YMCA and joined! I've been meaning to do this for weeks, as the Y is the best compromise between location, childcare, and pool schedule. Gabriel and Julian sat fairly peacefully, munching on apple and Goldfish (a rare treat, which backfired since Julian insisted on eating them off the ground with his mouth) while I filled out and signed forms.

Then I took them to the Y's Childwatch, of which there are two, depending on age. Both rooms are large and bright and pleasant and filled with fun toys, much nicer than the one at Supreme Court. Julian cried a little at first when I left him, insisting on "one more hug and a kiss", four or five times that is, but was fine within a few minutes. Gabriel, no problem, as I expected -- ironic considering how much trouble he gave me at the Supreme Court daycare as a baby! After filling out more forms and talking to each room's daycare ladies, I finally got to go check out the pool. I'd brought my swim stuff just in case...and it looked like I was going to get to sneak in a few minutes' swim!

I was thrilled, I haven't swum in a long time, and the urge to swim is very strong these days. It just feels like the perfect exercise for my beleaguered body. Spinning aggravates my weak sacro-iliac joint. Step classes, elliptical trainers and stair steppers bother my knees (and I don't have knee problems in general). Soon I won't be able to do Pilates or Ballecore or other similar exercises that emphasize abdominal work and lying on your back. (As an aside, I've mused how I seem to be attracted to the same genre of sport: dance, pilates, yoga, ice skating...all things which overall don't use equipment, aren't team sports, emphasize flexibility, aren't high-impact or high-cardio, and don't require hand-to-eye coordination. Other people love softball, basketball, volleyball -- sports without half a foot in the arts. That's not to say I don't like some sports: the dabbling I've done in volleyball and racquetball speak to that, and I know I'd love mountain biking, and of course I love to swim and am very inclined toward other water sports. But isn't it interesting how I, and most people probably, gravitate toward activities with similiar characteristics. I'd probably like tai chi and martial arts as well.)

Stepping back....Julian has an astounding record of needing to poop during his swim lesson. Four times in a row now, I've caught the straining eyes and puffy face and rushed him out of the pool just in time. A real pain when he's wearing fins and we're both soaking wet! Well, today he didn't poop in the pool, finally.

So when I went for my first swim at the Y today, I had to wait for about 20 minutes while the pool was closed due to a contamination (probably some other kid pooped in the pool). I got into my swim stuff, then did some stretches, and finally, finally was able to immerse myself in water and experience the almost hypnotic state of gliding through the water. Yay! It felt SO good. Being horribly out of shape, I stopped after only 5 laps to stretch, and looked up to see....Flora. The daycare lady from Julian's childwatch. Searching the pool. I called to her, and she saw me and said "Oh -- Julian go poo-poo!" I couldn't believe it. I'd been swimming maybe 5 minutes, and once again, pool time, this time mine, was foiled by Julian's bowels!

The afternoon went as usual, though it took me a while to get Julian inside to get him upstairs for his nap. He always protests at first, but usually goes along with the program as soon as I get started with a book (his latest favorite is "There's a Wocket in my Pocket" by Dr. Seuss). And for the 4th day in a row, I came down from getting Julian to bed to find Gabriel asleep. Today, Gabriel went into his room, closed his door and curled up on his bed under blankets.

I took a crucial nap too, only to be awakened by Julian crying, awake early from his nap. Only an hour and a half -- not long enough for him, but it's becoming more frequent. I took him downstairs and cuddled him on our bed, watching more junk TV, since I wasn't at all ready to move yet. Then Julian was quite still, and I saw that he'd fallen asleep again. He adjusted himself off of me, so I got up to prepare dinner. Lately I've been starting the lengthy dinner-prep process at around 4:30, in an attempt to get the boys fed early and before Dave gets home. They're impossible to have at our dinner table these days.


Meantime, Julian snoozed away on our bed, and Gabriel upstairs on his bed. At 6:30pm, Dave got home, and I left for my skating class -- and they were both still asleep! That confirms it: Julian really does need a 3-hour nap, but for some reason lately, he keeps waking up too early.

I had a great time skating, and came back to find two very well-rested and rambunctious little boys. Who miraculously went to bed by 9:30 despite their extended, and late, naps. Ah, sleep. It eludes me much these days, largely due to stomach troubles, but now, Baby#3's movement is starting to get big and strong enough to nudge me out of my usual troubled slumber. Three children adds up to many, many years of insufficient sleep. At least now I have a new way to boost my energy during the day: swimming.

5/25/06

5/18/06 Gabriel and Julian nap

A much better day than yesterday, even though there was more potential for failure since I had the boys all day. It definitely seems our Tuesdays and Thursdays go better than our MWF afternoons together.

Still, it's hard to go wrong starting off the day with swim class, they both love it. Gabriel is doing just great -- using his arms in a crawl, and then he rolls over to his back really well now (a precursor to learning to take breaths, I think).

I still needed an afternoon nap, but after yesterday's nap ordeal with Julian, I waited longer to try to get him down. Meantime, the boys had fun playing outside together, on the tricycle and with their new sanddozers. They played a lot together today, mostly pretty well. I think I only had to shout "GABRIEL!" when I heard Julian crying three or four times.

Then when it was time for a nap, I went through the usual routine, including a new book (Dr. Seuss' "There's a Wocket in my Pocket"). Julian resisted getting into bed, as per new usual, but I gave him just one chance -- one countdown and then I'd get the "crib." When I returned with said crib, he was lying in bed, and there he stayed for another 3 hours. Finally! He really needed a good solid nap.


When I returned from an unusually successful getting-down-for-nap, I found Gabriel asleep on our bed too. Perfect! I lay down and napped with him for about an hour. He woke up just as I did, and just looked at me at first, then sleepily blinked. I blinked back at him. Then he blinked back at me, and we went back and forth a few times like this until he burst out laughing.

I went back to my ice skating class tonight, after missing last week because of our trip. We had a different teacher this time, and she gave us lots of detail that I was surprised she'd bother with at our pathetic level. But what a difference! I think I actually felt what an edge is like, and my attempts at forward crossovers felt completely different. It's so much fun, I can't believe I waited this long in life to try skating. After that, I joined my mom friends for Coffee Night and an extended gossip session.

When I left for the evening, we went through the usual ritual of lots of hugs and kisses. I never mind this making me late, it's so sweet! The boys each have to give me one last hug, one more kiss, now the other side, big kiss, little kiss, rabbit kiss. Now they're starting it with Dave when he leaves in the morning. I just love it, that makes up for so much. Though today, there wasn't much making up for to do -- it's striking how much better afternoons go when everyone gets a decent nap.

Tomorrow, the boys spend the afternoon and night at Tonya's for sleepover. Yay! I have a lot to do tomorrow, but I'm especially planning on getting lots of rest. At least my sick feelings have stabilized somewhat. They go on and off all day, but a little bit more predictably than before, and with fewer extremes, but still. Blah. At almost 20 weeks along now, I think my stomach issues are in it for the long haul.

5/18/06

5/17/06: Belly Shots

Steph requested some belly shots, so here I am. 19 weeks along and sticking out a whole lot more than the first time!

Today I had the anatomical sonogram scan, and once again, all was normal. The sonogram technician said not many people don't want to know the sex of the baby anymore, no surprise. She said the baby's head was right up against my skin, plus I'm "so thin" (hah!), so she said no wonder I'm feeling and seeing the baby so much -- it's right there. Baby#3 head-butts me constantly; few hours go by that I don't feel it.

My stomach continues to be a nemesis, and soon the biomechanical challenges of pregnancy will kick in. I get out of breath walking up stairs now, and my fragile sacro-iliac joint (lower back) twinges all the time, reminding me of its imminent wrath. Sinus congestion and violent gut-wrenching (literally) sneezes also plague me. I refuse to say I'm too old for this. This level of physical misery sucks no matter how old you are.

I was an awful mom today. Supernanny would have been appalled at how impatient and ignoring I was with the boys. And I even had the morning "off"! I really, really needed a nap this afternoon, and Julian has gotten uncharacteristically unreliable. It took 45 minutes to get him down for a 40-minute nap, then another hour and a half to get him out of fussy grouchy mode because he hadn't had enough sleep. Me, I'm still in fussy grouchy mode.

Even though Julian was up at 3:15pm and we had plenty of time to go out to a park or make cookies or something, I was in no mood for it and instead tried to do a few things in the office, emerging only to scold them. At one point, Gabriel said to me, "No shouting, Mom!" and I knew he was right. His angry demeanor so reflects mine that it's downright alarming. Well, I guess we can't all be great moms every day. Oddly, I seem to have better days with them when I have them the whole day.

Today I feel very down about the whole kids experience. The only bright spot is imagining an innocent little baby again, that you never get mad at.

5/17/06

5/14/06: Murphy's and Sheep Ranch

We had an overall successful weekend on our annual Sheep Ranch and Murphy's trip, with the usual kid-challenges, but overall far better than last year.

We drove up Thursday late morning after swim class, and had a great trip. The boys like travelling, and the more interesting the road, the more they point things out and talk about the drive. "I like curves!" said Gabriel. We stayed in a rented cottage within walking distance of downtown Murphy's, a charming little tourist trap.

Friday we visited my first VP at my previous company, who incredibly, lives in Sheep Ranch now. He and his wife are raising horses on an old ranch along Sheep Ranch road, and are building a new house in a lovely little valley.


It's a great place to take kids visiting -- we looked at the river and threw rocks in, then saw goats, horses, miniature horses and the best part, construction vehicles.

Saturday is the big day at Sheep Ranch, where our old moto-friends stay and hang out at the historic Pioneer Hotel (which is privately owned now). We were very careful that two rambunctious little boys didn't disturb the group of about 25 mostly child-free grownups, with varying degrees of success. Any time anyone played with them, they loved it. Gabriel followed Lissa around like a puppy-dog -- even better, since she and Eric brought their brood of birds and rabbits! Amazing how people have hidden talents -- and Lissa has many not-hidden talents already -- who knew she was so great with kids.

Sunday morning's breakfast could have gone better: we went to a nice rustic place in Arnold called Bristol's, but Julian uncharacteristically was wiggly and difficult, grabbing and throwing things, not sitting down, and shouting "DAMMIT!" when scolded. After the 5th time that Dave brought him outside, we gave in to tag-teaming, and strapped Julian in the car and sat with him. That is, until he said "Dammit, Mommy" to me, so I left the car and sat outside in the parking lot. Not altogether bad in this particular parking lot; it was shaded with tall redwood trees and had a lovely mountain air. I used to spend all day immersed in that, exploring it via motorcycle. Nice, but still, I was ticked.

We took the usual indirect route home, travelling on roads only motorcyclists seek out, which again made for a far more enjoyable trip for all. When we needed a break though, I was in no mood to sit with Julian in another restaurant and be waited on, so we actually found a Carl's Jr. to have some french fries, a drink, and be on our way (the boys had yogurt first though). There is a place in life for fast food.

Next year, we're thinking about looking for a way to leave the boys behind and bring just baby#3. It's a lot of work for us keeping the boys under control, and arguably, little boys shouldn't be put in a position to be under control all day. That said, they loved being there and playing with grownups (including us). And of course, I just love being in the Sierra foothills again. We've got to go up there more than once a year. Someday.

5/14/06

Gabriel and Julian's carseats, take 2

More carseat-shopping this weekend revealed some excellent news for us: Not only will be probably be able to keep the car we have, but we might well get away with carseats we already have!

Dave's car has two identical narrow Graco carseats in it, one of which Gabriel is about to outgrow, and the other of which Julian can use in my car. The convertible/booster we keep in the pickup will work for Gabriel in my car, and Miss October gets the Britax Roundabout, rear-facing (after a few months of infant bucket carrier that is). Yay! Then, when it's time to forward-face the baby, Julian will be almost 4 and Gabriel almost 6, and we can re-evaluate and juggle carseats and/or boosters again.

We might want a bigger car at some point, but it's nice to know we won't be forced into it right away.

And are we the only people in the world who don't think a DVD player is utter necessity in a new car?! I overheard a mom talking about their drive to Disneyland, how the DVD player was essential for the 4-1/2 hour trip. She added that now, her 3-1/2-year-old wants to watch DVDs on the way to the grocery store. Well, yeah! No, I just don't see us going that route. Call me old-fashioned, but some amount of boredom is part of a kid's life. Part of anyone's life. Geez, would we have shouted Beatles songs at the top of our lungs for hours on our cross-country trip when I was a kid if we had a DVD player?

(Of course, it's very easy for me to say all this, since both Gabriel and Julian have always been very good in the car. Baby#3 might teach me a thing or two about the value of DVD players. Similarly, it'd be easy for me to think that it's because the boys don't watch TV or videos regularly, and have had almost no electronic toys, that they both have such good attention spans, but really, I think that's just the way they are. On the other hand, suppose we'd Baby Einstein'd them from day one? I thought about this again tonight as they took a bath in our huge Jacuzzi downstairs, since our upstairs bathtub is leaking (argh). So many households have toys all over the bathroom, but G & J were quite entertained with only a single cup each. Cause or effect?)

In other news, not only can I feel Baby#3 all the time, but now I can actually see the baby moving. Last night, the baby was particularly active, and I lay there and watched my tummy bulge out as tiny elbows and knees poked around. It's amazing, really -- many women don't even feel the baby at 18 weeks, and here I am watching it. Baby#3 has not let me forget he or she is here from even before the moment I knew about it.

Gabriel and Julian go to Gina's birthday party

Next year, I'm doing what Betsy did for Gina: a party at The Little Gym. An hour and a half long, the kids LOVE playing in the gym area, there's a separate room for cake that can get trashed, and they provide little water bottles as party favors.

Once again, the boys' personalities shone through. Gabriel wasted no time in running around like mad, laughing his head off nonstop. I remember wondering in swim class when he was a toddler if I thought so just because I was his mother, or was he really the most enthusiastic child there? I found myself wondering that again, because he was utterly exuberant.

At one point, they did a parachute time thing, and the teachers asked the group of kids the colors of the panels on the parachute, and as soon as the teacher put her hand on a panel, Gabriel jumped out with the answer. I wonder if he's like that in school, very eager to participate and shout out the answer?

Gina was adorable in wound-up pigtail braids (her Aunt Alice loves to do her hair) and pink dress. Next week, Gina and Gabriel start swim classes together, yay!

Julian, on the other hand, stood like a statue staring at all the kids. Even when the activity was to run in a circle, he so steadfastly refused to move that he ended up in the middle of the circle. The knowledgeable teachers tried to draw him in, knowing that often a kid is just being clingy, but that wasn't it. If I left him, he still wouldn't move, it wasn't about me! Just like in music class, it became almost comical, with my mom friends coming back to me from time to time to laugh and ask me what on earth was with him? He wouldn't budge!

Then, out of nowhere, Julian kicked into gear, and then challenged Gabriel in the exuberation department, running like crazy and laughing. He did so just before the teachers brought out a big basket of balls -- perfect! So, despite his usual slow start, he had a great time too.

I got mad at Gabriel for pushing Julian flat on his face too many times though. I never know where to draw the line: what is just brother rough-housing, and what is just not right? I fretted about this so much that I had dreams that night that Gabriel was tumbling Baby#3 against a wall. Gabriel's pushing wasn't malicious, but had it been on concrete, it would have hurt. As it was, Julian just got up laughing, and Gabriel never touched anyone else. I never know what to do.

Gabriel and Julian's haircuts

Boys in childcare all day today, Tonya picked up Gabriel from Kids Inc (thank you!). Wish I got more done, but I got a lot more done than I would have otherwise.

Tonya has a haircutter come to her house every 2 months or so, and we've taken advantage of this service twice now. Of course, we pay for the haircuts, more than we would at Supercuts, but the convenience is completely worth it. And they've gotten great haircuts, from the same person, so it's perfect.

They are SO cute with their short little haircuts!

Gabriel and Julian's carseats

We had quite the fun day today!

First, a rare peaceful morning with the boys playing quietly in the family room.


While Gabriel built one of his towers, Julian sat and read a book. So sweet.


Then, swim class.

Julian swam across the pool completely by himself for the first time! He slides off the side of the pool, so he doesn't even get a head start by jumping in, so he really has to swim the whole way.


Then he tells teacher Gina, "I want to swim to Mommy, ONE more time," holding up his ONE finger.

In playtime, I was clawed constantly as he swam to me again and again, no matter how I tried to escape his underwater antics. I'm very much looking forward to going somewhere with a beach so that he can play and splash and enter the water gradually, so I can turn my head and not worry that he's about to drown!

After swim class, we drove to Babies'R'Us to check out carseats. On the way there, the Queen song "Bohemian Rhapsody" was on the radio, and for some reason, the boys found this song absolutely hilarious! There's a section in the middle of the song that has a lot of odd lyrics, octave changes, and funny sounds ("Let me go!!!"), and the boys listened, looking at each other, and then cracking up with each new lyric. Who knew that song was so funny.

My mission at Babies'R'Us was to experiment with various carseats on the store's sample car bench. This was useful, and gives me renewed hope that we don't have to go the minivan or full-size SUV route, at least not right away. Here I tried a booster, harnessed carseat, and infant seat together. This could work!

But, I was told that the store has a no-photo policy, apparently to ward off competitors copying their displays. Very silly in this day and age of camera phones. We won't be buying six carseats there.

After lunch, the boys played outside, and "accidentally" dumped a huge load of dirt onto the lawn, a big Dad no-no. I was working inside, and my mom-alarm went off when it was too quiet, and I found the boys busily scooping the dirt back, apparently hoping to complete the task before they were discovered. I pretended to be stern, but really, they were so cute and so earnest in their work that I was delighted, especially to see them cooperating so well together.

Later, Julian was fascinated by a bug he found stranded on the walkway ("Look mommy, a WORM!"), though he poked it well beyond a tortured death. I can just imagine him and his cousin Aidan at work uncovering critters together! Meanwhile, Gabriel was building an elaborate 3-tiered track inside.

I made a hasty dinner for everyone, then took off for my second ice skating class. I had so much fun! Today we learned about T-stops, and practiced forward crossovers. I'm getting a much better feel for the best position and the value of slightly bent knees. I'm having so much fun with this, I don't even mind that I won't be able to skate easily when Miss October comes.

Speaking of whom, Miss October is jabbing me all the time, coming up with new creative motions. It almost feels like the baby is painting the walls inside sometimes. I'm still pretty sick most of the time though, I really hate the way I feel. Fun distractions like ice-skating and swim class are essential. I really look forward to having the energy and wherewithall to chase the boys around for more than a few minutes again. Maybe in about ten years.

Julian's goggles

Today at swim class, I got Julian some goggles (conveniently, I can buy them at the swim school). His eyes were so irritated and red last time, it was essential. He took very well to them and didn't protest at all -- I was prepared for a battle remembering Gabriel's reaction to goggles, but I keep forgetting who I'm dealing with.

They worked great. After swim class and playtime, Julian's eyes were just fine, though Gabriel was very puzzled by the rings around Julian's eyes. He was even more surprised to hear that he had them too!

I'm going to repeat myself here, but both boys are doing so well in swim class. Gabriel doesn't stop smiling or laughing, and he pays attention to the teacher and makes a real effort at doing everything right, mostly obeys the teacher and really puts himself into it. The teacher has him hold a ring out on front of him, and stroke one arm at a time, grabbing the ring after each stroke. He uses his arms in a passable crawl stroke in playtime now too. But mostly, he has SO much fun. Yay Gabriel!

And Julian...this little boy has a drowning wish. I just can't keep his head above water. He takes his own breaths in class now, inconsistently, but still sort of can. Still, he comes up coughing sometimes, having tried to get a breath underwater -- but even before he's caught his breath or finished coughing, he goes right back under. If I sit him on the side, he slides into the water immediately, without making any attempt at a jump. He refuses to dive in from a stand (which Gabriel did with great enthusiasm at this age), but I think if we worked on him, he'd get over that. And, today in class, we started him on his arms, telling him to splash them, and to watch Gabriel. Though Julian isn't as natural at Gabriel at doing the motion, he listens and imitates and tries -- and he did! It was great to see him attempting to use his arms while swimming too.

But in playtime, Julian is impossible, jumping into the water nonstop, whether or not he can rescue himself. By this age, Gabriel was pretty good at jumping in from the steps and swimming back around to the steps. Not Julian, he just just jumps in, again and again and again, sometimes with a goal (like swimming to me or to the side), but rarely an attainable one. It is constant work keeping track of him and pulling him out of the water, only for him to grab a quick breath and go right back under. It is not relaxing at all! But I'm so delighted that he loves the water so much that he is in it -- well, under it -- constantly. The goggles only encourage him to go under.

Tonight I went to an outing with my Mom friends, to a place called Dream Dinners. There, we each prepared 6 meals each to bring home and freeze, made at prep stations completely outfitted with ingredients and measuring tools. And it was fun! Meantime, while I was preparing gourmet meals, the boys were at home eating mac'n'cheese, talking about Julian's new goggles.

Dave reports that after the boys' dinner, he took them both down the block, Gabriel riding his bicycle and Julian riding a tricycle. This gives me grand visions of the whole family riding together soon! Both boys have a long way to go...or do they? It can't be that far off! I'm starting to see that one thing I was really dreading about baby#3 was putting the rest of our lives on hold for a while, being back in baby mode. But the 3rd baby doesn't dominate the family dynamic, he/she can't put us into baby mode single-handedly as the 1st baby did. Gabriel and Julian are active little boys who want to do things, and I want to do things with them -- that's not going to stop because of a baby. It can't. So maybe my grand visions of snorkeling and camping and cycling aren't going to be put off for 3 years as we'd thought. Asking Gabriel and Julian to wait is too much. And yay for that!

Gabriel and Julian's "Mad World"

Some months ago, a song became a mild hit called "Mad World," sung by Gary Jules, a cover of the original song by Tears for Fears. I loved the Gary Jules version, but was curious about the original version. It appears on the Tears for Fears best hits album, which I bought and put in my car. I meant to only play it when I was alone, but one day some weeks back, Julian was in a screaming fuss about having been forcibly placed in his carseat after glaring at me like a petulant teenager with his tongue sticking out while he ran down the "get in or get put in" countdown. If there's too much kid noise in the car, I blast the grownup noise -- in this case, Tears for Fears' "Mad World." A few times of this strategy, and they both grew to like the song.

So now, Gabriel refers to it as "my favorite song." When I start the song, as soon as they hear the distinctive percussive opening, they both shout, "YES!" as though they were at a live concert. It's so cute, it makes me laugh every time. Julian actually tries to sing the music, mimicking the heavily synthesized sounds. Someday they'll be very embarrassed that 1980s pop was ever a favorite!

Speaking of singing, Gabriel and Julian have both been singing together more and more. At first, I thought they were singing songs they'd heard at Tonya's, but then I realized that some of them must come from Gabriel's preschool, and Julian picks up on them. Some of them don't sound like anything at all, and i think they're just making them up. But they sing in unison, looking at each other, occasionally laughing, reminding each other of the words. I've got to capture this on video, it's really cute. It'll be very interesting to see how they sing with their musical cousins!

Gabriel and Julian "Pump It Up"

Today our Sunday outing was to Duncan's 4th birthday party, at a place called "Pump it Up." It's a place with huge rooms with several inflatables -- slides, obstacle courses and gigantic jump houses. There must have been 30 kids invited, so it was a perfect place for a big party. The party started out in one room with various slides and jumphouses, then moved to another room with yet more, then into a banquet room for pizza and cake.

I half-expected Gabriel to get stuck in the inflatable obstacle courses, as he did in a similar thing last fall at a fair. He's really not that good at climbing up the "ladders" in those things, but this time, he did fine. He almost didn't stop laughing or running, he had such a great time tackling all the equipment.

Julian, typically, would have nothing whatsoever to do with the jump houses or obstacle course, not with me, and certainly not on his own. But, the second room had a ball play area, with nets to hold the balls and a backboard with various holes to throw the balls into. This was much more his speed, and he had a great time kicking and chasing the balls.

I did get Julian to go down one big slide, but only when I carried him up the ladder (urf) and then held him while we zoomed down. Those slides go FAST, and the stops at the bottom are not designed for adults, who barrel right over them onto their butts! Fortunately, Julian laughed the whole way. I went down with Gabriel a few times too, he loved doing that with me ("come ON, Mom!").

I love seeing them zoom around happily, what a perfect party!