4/5/09 Playing House

This morning, there were unusual and suspicious happy sounds coming from the boys' room for quite some time. The children were all playing together, and no screaming? What could possibly induce such peace?

How about, playing House? Julian had tucked Gabriel and Katrina in together on his quilt on the floor.


Then read Katrina a bedtime story.


Later, we went to a friend's post-remodel open house, and got to see a beautiful house that's actually lived in, rather than camped in, as ours is. Thank goodness we did our open house before any of our things -- and us -- were actually in there.

Katrina found a dollhouse in no time. More playing House.


And of course, at home, it's just one big game of House. Furniture repair, box unpacking, shelf adjusting, door-fixing, stuff-sorting, thing-finding....this isn't just playing anymore.

4/5/09

4/4/09 Big Bunny Fun Run

We did the Big Bunny Fun Run today!

This is sort of a sentimental event to me, since it's what got me started running in 2007. This year, Gabriel ran the 5K with me, while Julian walked the 1K course with Laura and Lance. (Meantime, Dave took Katrina to her first gymnastics class, which went predictably: she refused to participate.)

I figured there was a good chance Gabriel and I would get separated on the course, but he's old enough now it's not a problem -- he can follow the people and the signs no problem. I figured he'd probably start off running fast and poop himself out and walk, so I warned him that I would ditch him if he did -- I'm in this to run it!

But once he heard that it's a real race, he talked a lot about trying to actually win it. "Nope!" I informed him. "You're not going to win it." If a 7-year-old wins a 5K, it's not a very competitive one. But, I told him, you can try to win your division, which was Boys 6-8.

And he came in second!!!

First, the requisite photo with the Big Bunny as we were checking in. Julian is still afraid of the Big Bunny, even though I assured him that it's just a person in a costume.


Me and my dear boys, before the race.



My camera's battery died right as the race started, so I didn't get a photo of Gabriel actually running. Not that I had much chance -- he ditched me within seconds, and I didn't see him until we reunited at the end. He finished minutes before I did, at a time of 27:46. That's just under a 9-minute mile, faster than I've ever run the few 5Ks and 10Ks I did. (Though, that's not saying much; whatever strengths I had as a runner didn't include speed.)

After the race, we endured a late-running half-hour raffle, and then incomplete results, to finally hear the awards for the Boys 6-8 division. Competition wasn't stiff; the 3rd place finish was 32 minutes, but the first-place in his division came in at 25 minutes (wow). Gabriel will have to work very hard in two years to place: the third-place boy in the 9-12 age group came in at 21 minutes. The first-place boy in the 9-12 age group finished in under 18 minutes!

Still, I was very proud for Gabriel's moment on the podium accepting his trophy. And so was he!


I should know better by now not to underestimate this child. He was absolutely determined to win. He said later that when his body told him to walk, he didn't, because he was going to win. I told him I was very proud of how hard he tried today -- that I'm very happy for him that he placed second, but I'm most proud of his effort and his focus. I know it sounds hokey to kids -- they want the trophy -- but it really is true. His focus and persistence are what make him so remarkable.

And his patience. Katrina insisted on combing his hair tonight, and he sweetly begrudged her. This makes him even more of a winner to me. (Sorry for the corn.)


Well, I'd hoped to stave off my sons being faster than me for a little longer, but, today proved the torch has been passed!

4/4/09

4/3/09 Busy Boy Mom

I did so much with the boys today. I really liked that!

First, Gabriel's school had its first-grade concert today. Lots more kids than parents there, but despite my pending unemployment, this was too important to miss.


Gabriel was very, very happy I was there, and kept looking for me.


His class did a silly-face photo. The girl next to him I've made friends with, she's very outgoing and confident and I really like her. I definitely joke around and interact with the kids differently than most of the moms, but then, most of the moms and I were raised in very different cultures.


Then later in the afternoon, I took the boys to their first swim lesson. Julian was hilarious on his first back float in 2 years, holding his mouth wide open, literally like a fish out of water gasping for breath. But he had a great time.

Gabriel, not as much, though I couldn't get a straight answer out of him why. First he said he didn't like his swim trunks (and I did have to apply an emergency safety pin in the midst of his class), but later he said that everyone in his class swam better than he does. All the more reason. I consider these lessons mandatory, at least for a little while.

Then we went to pick up Katrina, but Tonya had taken the kids out for a long walk and wouldn't be back for another 35 minutes. What do you do with 35 minutes? I knew what I should do -- swim lessons underscored how long the boys' hair had gotten (goggles are a pain) -- but, being iPhone-free, I had to take a chance on driving around and hoping I'd pass by a SuperCuts. My gamble paid off, and the boys are now a-stylin'.


Then after dinner, the boys and I made cookies. My first baking in my new kitchen! I hadn't planned to have them help me; these were initiation cookies to get familiar with my kitchen and optimize locations of things (note to self: move measuring cups to the top drawer!), but they both got really excited about helping me. They were both having such a good time, seemingly relishing this sort of activity together (~ouch~working~mom~guilt~ouch~) that I didn't mind the delay, though it got really late. They did great taking turns, talked excitedly about measuring things and holding the mixer, and each got to lick a beater.

I even got Julian's toenails clipped today -- arguably the biggest accomplishment!

Having afternoons together after school every day -- or even just some days -- would be the perfect balance.

4/3/09

Howdy, SUCKA!

Julian's school brought in a photographer with a pony to take adorable photos of the kids. I had no intention of participating, and didn't even ask about it or sign Julian up. Photos like this are the worst of the worst to me -- staged is bad enough, but I really don't like costumes and props, especially ones that have no relevance to our lives. Forget it.

But, as it turns out, they take photos of all the kids regardless, and parents have the option later of buying the photos, or not. Yeah, right. What option? Like you can possibly turn down your kid with a pony?

And sure enough, the photos were even hokier than I could possibly have imagined! So hokey that they tipped to the other side and are absolutely, positively hilarious.

How campy does this get: a cowboy strumming a guitar, and carrying a rope.


Or tipping his 10-gallon hat while astride his trusty steed.


It's so bad it's great. Then there's the complete love of seeing your child's beaming smile, even if it comes next to an animal he's probably terrified of and normally wouldn't get within 100 feet of.


Bill's Pony Pictures lightened my load by 40 bucks today. I just couldn't resist the guitar.

4/2/09 The Turnaround

I still remember the advice we got from several sources -- including an expensive child psychologist expert -- when I exasperatedly asked what to do when toddler Gabriel would throw a huge fit in our driveway and refused to come inside. Inevitably, the advice dodged the question and handed him control: "Just let him." Yeah, but what if I don't want my 2-year-old screaming in the driveway -- or screaming inside because I carried him in -- for 45 minutes every day while I'm trying to make dinner and take care of other children? What if I find the whole situation disruptive, distracting, and unacceptable? I'm allowed!

What should I do?

I finally concluded -- largely thanks to the non-help of experts, that there really was no answer, and that I had to handle each new iteration as its own episode, and choose one or two aspects of the situation to focus on, grit my teeth and stick it out. That's how I got through Gabriel's difficult and painful toddlerhood.

The memories rushed back today as I pulled a grumpy Katrina out of the car, and she threw herself on the ground and shouted "No!" when I asked her to bring her lunch inside. Shades of the past! Meantime, Gabriel, the Original Sinner, agreeably took his own lunch inside, chuckling at his sister's antics.

What should I do?

Well, despite this re-enactment bringing up my PTSD, I was able to stay calm and do what I often do when I just don't know what else to do: take pictures. And incredibly, my attempt to document a reincarnated moment turned it around.

Katrina started off having a tantrum in Gabriel's driveway-tantrum spot, but then found that her lunch bag made a fine rabbit in a pinch, and started "hopping" the bag up and down until she was laughing and relaxed. This is what those experts are thinking of -- a normal rich array of possible responses on the part of fickle toddlers, induced by distraction and not reacting to the tantrum. That never came close to working on Gabriel. Katrina isn't exactly textbook in toddler response, but she's at least in the library. Gabriel wasn't.


And then she was very funny and agreeable the rest of the evening, even volunteering to go pee in the little potty once, and making it happen. Definitely her brother's sister, but thankfully no carbon copy.

4/2/09

4/1/09 The Addition

Dave and I had an interesting idea tonight....now that we're back home and starting to settle in (keyword there is "starting"), and our schedules are becoming utterly predictable with two out of three kids in school soon, maybe we can start thinking about a new addition to the family!

We've both always loved dogs, and came very close to getting a dog before Gabriel came, when we reluctantly bowed to practicality and decided to wait. I used to go to agility trials as a rare spectator -- no one who doesn't have a dog goes to those! We always thought we should wait until the youngest child was 4 or 5, but that was before another youngest child shifted everything by a few years. Maybe it's time to un-hold a lifelong dream.

Having looked into this a lot already, I already know where to start: rescue organizations for a breed or basic type/size of dog we'd like, that have fostered the rescues and that can place them wisely with the right family. Oh my how the kids would LOVE it! Even Julian, who's always been a little afraid of dogs, but has always been very interested in them. But really, it's for me -- I've always wanted my own dog.

Meantime, Katrina was being silly with her spoon tonight. Not silly enough to distract Gabriel, who's been walking around all day with his nose buried in his newly beloved Rainbow Magic book.

He even insisted on bringing his new books -- carefully placed inside the Borders shopping bag, receipt and all -- to school today, and I found him wrapped up in them again when I picked him up at the CDC. He's carried one of the books everywhere with him today, and won't even take his eyes off it walking into the bathroom to brush his teeth.


I should know better than to really cook on a "work night," but I'm starting to get into a groove in my new kitchen. Tonight, it actually happened that I used all six burners on my cooktop. So I had to take a picture.

OK, I could have made all this with four burners, and in fact, it turns out that it's pretty hard to keep track of six things going at once, but partly it eliminated some timing logistics, and partly I did it just because I could.

And partly, because I have a somewhat picky family and because I'm compulsive. Gabriel doesn't like asparagus, so does that mean the whole family never eats asparagus, or that he gets out of eating a vegetable when the rest of us have asparagus? And Dave really likes it grilled, but I wanted to try a shallot-mustard-orange sauce on steamed asparagus. So: all of the above. Gabriel gets green beans, I grill asparagus for Dave, steam it for me and Julian, and make a sauce. These variations alone accounted for three burners!

Thanks to my new high-BTU burners and kick-*ss range hood, I can grill indoors again, and in fact have used my grill pan more than any other pot or pan so far. I need another one; this one is too small and is such a pain to clean. Or better yet, a real grill outdoors. Mmm.

4/1/09

p.s. I think we'll name our dog April Fool....gotcha.

3/31/09 Rainbow Magic

Gabriel was so enthusiastic about something today that he finished his homework -- the whole week's worth -- before dinner, then asked again and again if I would take him out after dinner so he could spend his own allowance money on it. I agreed, and took him out to the store, though I couldn't dissuade him from spending almost every cent he had on this highly desirable thing.

What could possibly motivate a 7-year-old boy so much to do his homework early and spend all his money? A Lego Bionicle? A remote-control stunt motorcycle? A video game?

Nope. Would you believe: a fairy story?

He had to have some "Rainbow Magic" fairy story books, such as India the Moonstone Fairy. He chose wisely, coming away with two four-in-one books, each $6.99, instead of individual stories for $4.99 each. This really counts when you only have $16 to begin with. The past few days, it's been all I could do to tear him away from these same books at the CDC, so they must be pretty good.

On the way home, we were waiting at a long red light, and he said, "When is this light going to turn green? I'm tired of breathing in this spot!"

Katrina was in true form tonight, being bossy and picky and resistant to everything, until she discovered a windfall of new puzzles.

It's handy to have friends nearby with girls outgrowing stuff just in time, though these puzzles aren't specifically "girl" toys. We really don't have a lot of girl-oriented things around here. Except for our boy's fairy books.

3/31/09

3/30/09 Wired

It's one thing to go overboard in wiring every room, some in multiple places, with cable, phone and data outlets. It's a little crazy to have an upstairs and downstairs patch panel. And to accidentally spend a small fortune doing so.

But it's another thing when much of it just doesn't work. And when you spend the entire evening carrying a TV and phone around to every outlet to test them, climbing in and out of a filthy basement, tracing, marking and moving cables, and discovering that yet more doesn't work. The effort, time and money we already put into this makes me resent every minute. This is definitely one of those things that if you want it done right, you have to do it yourself. I've run and traced a lot of cables in my career, and I mark them.

And I get to miss more work tomorrow morning because the plumbers can't tell left from right either (hot and cold in their world). Missing work was routine recently; now it's a major imposition. We have to get on with our lives already!

At least Dave figured out why our cable TV wasn't working upstairs, normally the only place TV ever gets watched around here (ironically). Just in time to find out that there really isn't anything to watch anyway. Food Network is packed with commercials, and I just don't have the heart to watch HGTV right now.

3/30/09

3/29/09 Emergency Furniture?

Dave and I were musing last night about what furniture we really "need." Everything we have, we've had for years, and it was a mishmash before that there was no point in replacing until after The Grand Remodel. Now it's overwhelming, and much of it is there, so it's hard to prioritize what to get first. I figured I'd let the answer present itself, that the most urgent need would make itself known in due time.

This afternoon after Katrina and I got home from another nice Easter party, she made a beeline upstairs to play. Dave and the boys were out, so I took the opportunity for a quick snack, then forced myself to spend 5 minutes on a project I've been avoiding. Katrina sounded perfectly happy upstairs (that should have been a warning sign), but it was approaching naptime, so I went up to get her ready.

As I went up the stairs, she appeared at the top, and I was shocked -- both her arms were completely coated in something white and gooey. First short-sleeved T-shirt of the year, too. I could see it was on her clothes and her shoes and she was making footprints of it. She must have found my hand lotion.

Then in the boys' room, there was a huge puddle of the white goopy stuff, with a craft project of Julian's soaking in the middle of it, and various other toys coated too. GREAT. I picked up Katrina to start to wash her off when I realized....oh no. This isn't lotion -- it's GLUE.

An entire bottle of Elmer's glue, dumped in a puddle and then luxuriously spread all over her arms and clothes. Julian had left it out when he'd asked Dave to open the box labeled "Crafts" so he could work on a wooden squirrel project, which he did on the floor right as you walk into the boys' room. A magnificent mess, and one with a clock, because the stuff would soon start to dry. I was so stunned I barely knew where to start. Fortunately I heard Dave pulling into the driveway just then, and carried Katrina under her arms down the stairs hollering, "HELP!" After we stripped her, he gave her a bath downstairs while I tackled the sticky puddle upstairs.

So I was right. The most-needed furniture would find a way to call out the criticality of its purchase. We need a craft table!

3/29/09

p.s. these just in from Sonia, some photos she took at the Easter party today. Katrina was in a very silly mood!

3/28/09 Egg Hunt

I took all three kids to an Easter party thrown by the 2004 Las Madres group today. This is a marvelous event, at a perfect venue, a church that has indoor and outdoor play areas, a large room with a stage, and a beautiful courtyard inbetween, a perfect place for an egg hunt.

First, Katrina had a MASSIVE tantrum about putting on a pretty dress this morning, most of which occurred after I'd given up and taken the dress off her. So the day didn't start well. But it was a gorgeous, sunny day and she lightened up immediately when we arrived at the party.

After a storytime, the kids lined up for the Easter Egg Hunt, then were set loose. I wasn't paying attention and didn't realize the hunt was about to start, then saw kids sprinting into the courtyard, and then Gabriel walking in a hurry looking around for me. He didn't have a basket -- and meantime the craze was on! I felt awful, he was spinning around looking for a basket in the first few moments of the fun. These are the moments that break kids' (well, moms') hearts. But he was very relaxed about it, spotting me and calling, "Mom, where's my basket?" His resiliency never ceases to amaze me. Julian was busy working on a craft project and hadn't noticed. Fortunately several moms were judiciously setting out eggs as needed, looking out to make sure every kid got their dozen, so even though the boys were late to the game, they were happy.

Katrina got the hang of looking for eggs this time.


Katrina joined Julian for an egg-opening session, getting help from him as needed.


Gina and Gabriel compared notes too.


My friend Sonia helped me with a little photo session. The boys refused. They already had candy in their mouths, so my bribery option was gone. Katrina was cooperative as long as she was near her eggs.



Big brothers and little sister....a view I never tire of.

It looks so adorable, but I had a hard time getting all three in the car -- constant interruptions with dropped and rolling-away eggs -- and had to take them across the parking lot and into the car one at a time. What a pain!

Despite a sleepover last night, and a busy day today, Katrina had a hard time falling asleep tonight. I could hear her on the monitor rattling around in her room, rocking the rocking chair, turning on the few battery-powered toys that have made it past my anti-noisy-toy net. I was cleaning up in the kitchen and hoped she would just wind down on her own, but after about half an hour, denial was obviously not the way to go. I found that she'd stripped down to her diaper and had completely emptied three of her drawers of clothes onto the floor in one big pile, as well as a bag of clothes to give away. "I want THIS pajamas!" she said, handing me a lovely 12-month footie that hasn't fit her for a year. First the dress this morning, now this. Picky, picky!

Despite the mounds of work facing me at home today, it was really nice to take the kids out and be a mom for the morning.

3/28/09

3/26/09 Lifesaving

There was a news story a few years back about an averted tragedy in San Francisco. A man saw his 2-year-old daughter fall through the rails at a pier, into the bay water. He stood shocked at first, then began calling for help. A nearby DHL deliveryman saw what was happening, and jumped into the chilly seawater to rescue the girl. Thanks to his heroism, she was fine.

I believe firmly in swim lessons from a young age as a matter of water safety. But not because I think the 2-year-old could have saved herself. Because the father, who never learned to swim, stood helplessly on the pier as he watched his daughter drown. Clearly his fear of water was powerful, as few parents can watch their children die without taking action. He knew he couldn't rescue her. That's the person I don't ever want my children to become.

Swim lessons were fun with the boys when they were babies (Katrina was never fun in swim lessons), but now the boys are old enough that knowing how to swim is a matter of safety and confidence and lifetime competence. Not to mention that I love water sports and water things, so I have future Hawaii trips in mind!

And thanks to our completed (where the term "complete" must be calibrated in the context of "remodel") house, I can now do this with them. So I signed the boys up for swim lessons today, starting in 2 weeks! The logistics will become a drag, I'm sure, but I'm happy to be doing something important and fun as a mom again, even though I'll sit on the sidelines and watch.

And finally being able to do some sort of regularly scheduled activity with my children again is downright uplifting. I think this is saving my life more than theirs!

noemi

3/25/09 Bossy baby!

Katrina gets so demanding about what other people do at dinner that she actually gets mad and starts to cry if they don't comply. If Dave pulls out his iPhone, she demands: "POCKET!" (put it back in your pocket). Tonight she insisted that Julian put his milk down -- he was just holding it while he swallowed, geez!

Yesterday I captured the tail end of a long fit in which she demanded that Gabriel eat his spinach. She was even pushing his head down into the food, commanding him, "Eat! EAT!" By the time I got the camera, she was mostly done with this campaign, and they quickly picked up their usual dinnertime antics.

Though the original "highlight" of this clip was her bossy behavior, actually the gentle way they interact together is the most captivating to me. Gabriel just calmly accepts her pushiness, runs with it and turns it into an affectionate game.

(Katrina doesn't know it, but she's getting her share of spinach too. "Near East" Parmesan-flavored couscous is a great vessel for bits of chopped spinach. She loves it and devoured over half of what I made from one box.)

Gabriel did ultimately eat his spinach though. There was another green item on the line: Girl Scout Thin Mint ice cream!

3/25/09

3/24/09 Upstairs, downstairs

As a kid, it used to drive me crazy when my parents sent me on errands up and down the 3 flights of stairs in our Brooklyn row house. For a while, I really thought they only had kids to go fetch things from the top story.

History repeats itself. I now make frequent use of all the ready child labor around here to bring things up and down the stairs. There are lots of things I swore I would never do as a parent. Thank goodness that isn't one of them. And bonus, there's three gofers! Well, there will be when one of them doesn't need both hands to get up and down the stairs that is.

I've finally liberated some photos and videos from my camera. I forgot I took these at the restaurant where we had dinner the day we moved. Katrina was unusually cooperative.


Tonight Dave had dinner at a conference he was at all day, so I did a quickie dinner for the kids. This is a view you will tire of soon, but I never will.


The novelty of the island is wearing off though; I keep having to move Julian to the end so he and Gabriel don't fight -- or play! Sometimes them playing together is more disruptive than fighting. Life is most peaceful around here when one of them is upstairs and one is downstairs.

3/24/09

3/23/09 Back to work

Today was the first day of "normal," sort of. Dave and I both went back to work today, and we didn't spend half the day emailing and calling to deal with the house. There are still some things that need to be dealt with soon, like the plumbing, but most of the pressure is self-imposed. That said, by the time I'm done making dinner, cleaning up and making lunches, overseeing homework and everything, I am in no mood to work on unpacking.

I did do a little "homework" tonight anyway -- I got my computer and peripherals all connected! From which I type now, though I don't have the energy to deal with photos.

Gabriel asked today, "When we don't have a house full of boxes, can we go to Legoland in San Diego?" That'd be great, kid.

Katrina has been a little ray of sunshine lately, with few tantrums and lots of playful laughter. If she gets hurt, she even wants a hug, though typical Katrina, she demands it: "HUG ME!" That's one time I don't insist on a "please."

3/23/09

3/22/09 chit-chat

I still don't have my computer up, so, no photos or videos yet. Too bad, 'cause today Gabriel spent a good half-hour playing "cable car" with Katrina, pushing her around on a little wagon, with a stop and start to the track, and her going "ding ding!" as they circled the house. SO cute. It's unthinkable what her life would be like without him.

I think we're done with the high chair. She loves sitting on the barstools in the kitchen at the island, though as I expected, disagreements about who gets which fruit have arisen. "I want to sit on GRAPES!" she'll announce. She always gets her way first, and the boys are left to duke it out over Cherries.

This afternoon she sat and munched some apple for quite a while as I muddled through the daunting task of unpacking and arranging the kitchen. It was fun sitting and chatting with her, as much as a 2-year-old chats. She points out numbers and shapes and colors around her, she nibbles a piece of apple and tells me what shape she made it, and I make silly faces at her and tell her little things she probably doesn't understand but she seems to enjoy hearing.

It occurred to me that I have another person in my life now who I can always call or email with for no particular reason, and it starts now. It probably started some time ago, but the layout of our new kitchen opens up that world now. My favorite view is seeing all three of them sitting together at the island, looking at me while I work, and I can easily see and smile at them at the same time. I'm glad they'll remember my face instead of my back.

3/22/09

3/21/09 Holding Out

Not surprisingly, moving home doesn't mean we have any more time to spend playing; not with stone backsplashes to seal, privacy window film to install, butcher block tops to treat, and thousands of boxes to unpack.

So I hung out with Katrina after her "nap" (if having Julian join her in her room to play counts as a nap, grr), and got her to sit on the potty for a while. Then she wanted underpants, great.

She played outside for quite a while and stayed dry, so I took her upstairs to see if I could get her to sit on the potty again. Of course not, and then she literally got her knickers in a twist, insisting on putting both her legs through one leg-hole in her underpants and having a huge fit about not being able to put the underpants on, but refusing my help. Whatever.

Pretending to ignore her, I "tested" the shower in the bathroom again, spritzing the handshower all over the bathtub. And incredibly, the sound of dripping water did the job. She walked over to the little potty, sat down and concentrated for a moment, stood up, and announced her accomplishment. I couldn't believe it! This was no accident, no random event -- she made it happen.

She's been holding out on us!

3/20/09 Digging Out

It's still in the overwhelming stage. Just the most basic tasks take a lot of searching and opening and arranging. But I did make dinner tonight!

We're slowly crawling out of the hole. We got a microwave, shelves are getting adjusted, leaky gas line fitting tightened, floor heat thermostats set, laundry detergent unearthed. I have a goal of unpacking at least 3 boxes a day, which sounds like a very small goal, but it's amazing how quickly a day goes by. And it's SUCH a drag unpacking the kitchen stuff! Did the movers have to individually wrap every water bottle??

The plumbers were here today, and admitted to swapping the hot and cold in two bathrooms. Geez! Fortunately this can be fixed with "reverse cartridges," which the Grohe rep told me he's sold so many of, to recover from plumber's mistakes, that they put his kids through college. The 3rd bathroom's thermostatic valve just needed calibration, so now we're up to two working shower/baths.

Last night as I cut up cantaloupe for lunch, Julian sat at the island across from me and colored a flower picture from school. I loved that I could do my thing and he could do his right in the same space, and we could easily chat about the silly names for the colors on the colored pencils he was using. It was really nice. This was only sort-of possible at the rental house, and completely impossible in our old house.

Gabriel asked me today I'm ever going to pick him up from school again. That kid has an astounding capacity to shatter my heart in a flash. I miss the other two also, but it feels worse for the one in school. But I'm starting to feel it for Julian too, who needs more interaction and playtime with me than Gabriel did. Katrina is still young enough to be happy to bop around with anyone, though the happy way she greets me at the end of the day is starting to add to the guilt pile too.

Next week, we get to go to work without the pressure of Friday jobsite meetings, or being called or emailed and having to drop things at any moment to go handle some crisis, and with a lot of annoying driving eliminated. Next week starts the new normal.

3/20/09

3/19/09 We moved!

Typing from Dave's computer here; most of the office is still in boxes.

WHAT a day. I don't think I've ever been so tired in my life. It went well, but moving is very very intense. I wanted SO much to just blow off the rest of the evening and go to bed, but, kids needed their beds made, clothes set out, and lunches made. It took hours to find everything needed just for those basic operations.

Kids were excited, all three had new beds in new places. Funny with the 3rd kid -- the transition from a crib to a bed, usually a big deal in a toddler's life, let alone in a new room in a new house was, "here ya go baby, good night!" She did fine. Katrina is a very adaptable person.

She's out of practice with stairs though, and not exactly a fast learner in the athletic department. "I scary!" But she got downstairs this morning herself, with some effort.

Boys are beside themselves about bunk beds. Julian's been sleeping on a crib mattress on the floor for months, since his toddler bed fell apart. For so long we knew we were moving that it wasn't worth upgrading his bed until we moved home, and now he finally has one. This is his first full-sized bed too.

A few problems though. NONE of the shower/baths in our new bathrooms work. That's THREE! One is only hot. One is only cold. And one is only lukewarm. It's like porridge! Fortunately one was "just right" -- the bathroom we already had, with my bathtub that I swore would never see a little boy's bare butt. Apparently we really do need four bathrooms. Gawd.

And our fancy new Bosch dishwasher doesn't dry dishes. They were dripping water this morning. Bug or feature?

And many of our phone and cable outlets, which we went to considerable expense and effort to have installed all over the house, don't work. No "Jon and Kate Plus Eight" in bed for me now!

But overall, we're really happy to be back here. I hadn't realized how confined I felt in our rental house. I like the taller ceilings, the ample windows, the wood floors, the second story, the multitude of spaces. I like walking around, I like the crazy way the spaces flow together. I like hanging out and looking around. That was the main reason we did this, something so intangible, yet so palpable. There's lots ahead, but it's mostly on our own time now.

And it only took Dave 20 minutes to drop everyone off this morning.

3/19/09

The photo session

Last Saturday, the day before the open house, my friend Paul came over to take some photos of the house. I pounced on an opportunity to get some photos of the kids by a good photographer with a good camera, and maybe even with me. Katrina was unusually cooperative, but Gabriel was really not feeling well. Still, Paul got some fun shots.



March 14, 2009

3/17/09 The Scholar

Tonight as I was helping Julian get ready for bed, he said excitedly, "Today in school, we did blending words!" Blending words? He continued, "The teacher asked us if we knew any words with 'sn' -- and I raised my hand right away and said 'SNOT!!'" Ah, a chip off the old block. My boy....makes me so proud.

This is the last night we spend at Hydrangea Court. I feel like I'm about to go to sleep in a black-and-white world and wake up in a color paradise.

3/17/09

3/16/09 Three on the island

I did get a few photos the day of our open house, before the event started. For once, I had the foresight to bring lunch for the bunch before the party. For actually sitting down and eating, we had to make do on the island. We'd intended the island to be able to seat three, somehow thinking at the time that three siblings next to each other would be a good thing.

And provided they're ordered carefully, it can be. Julian really couldn't bug Katrina much here, though he could kick the island under him a lot. I wasn't sure how Katrina would do on a barstool, but she was fine (though she's a long way from being able to climb up or down herself).

Our children's first meal in the house they will always remember as their childhood home. Such a moment.

I love these barstools. Black barstools definitely don't "go" in this kitchen, but painting the legs will take care of that.

I might just have to get "Pears" too.

The big push to pack is on!

3/16/09

3/15/09 Open House

Our open house today was a smashing success! I was so busy catching up with old friends, meeting neighbors and talking house that I never got to take a single photo. Many, many kids were there, and they had a great time with the hide-away closet under the staircase. The ping-pong table was in constant use (though I'm not sure much ping-pong actually got played), but the dirtpile was the favorite feature. I absolutely loved having our house overrun with kids running around and laughing and having a great time.

It was really fun to spend actual time in our house as a house, and not a jobsite. It meant that we could entertain and see our friends and make new ones -- primarily our neighbors that we've never met. There still are many things that need to be taken care of, but today was really the first time the house started to work for us, instead of us for it. It's going to be hard at work for years. Three childhood memories will be formed there.

3/15/09

The Milestone

Did I say the house is not a jobsite anymore? I counted five trades at the same time today -- painters, kitchen installers, floor guys, tile guys, and electricians. Plus the GC and GC's foreman. And the homeowner.

It should have been six trades -- our heat guy didn't get the message and didn't arrive today. Neither the upstairs nor downstairs heat works!

Please bow your heads and take a moment to honor a truly major milestone in this projecT: the porta-potty has been taken away! This moment was sufficiently momentous as to warrant a photo.

Bye!

Lots to prep for the open house Sunday, and then it's a big scramble to pack and move in. The house is the best it'll ever be right now -- gleaming new, empty, the tiniest flaws immediately repaired. I'm not the sort to be fussy about a perfect house -- my philosophy runs along the lines of "the house works for you, you don't work for the house." I respect shoes-off policies in other homes, but it doesn't at all fit us. Still, the first ding, the first furniture mark, the first crayon graffiti, will sting. For a few more days, it's still a showpiece, but after that, it shifts to "home."

3/13/09 Triple Trouble

There are times, as we wrap up the biggest construction project we'll ever take on in our lives, that I wonder: was this really necessary? Did we go overboard? Couldn't we be perfectly happy in the 1800 sq.ft. 4BR house we've been living in the last 9 months?

Ultimately, perhaps. But it's dawned on me recently that the physical configuration of the eating area has caused real problems. Annoyances, we've known all along, but "annoying" long ago tipped over into "problem."

There simply isn't enough room in the eating area for a family of five. The table that fits only seats four, and we have to seat the boys across from each other (and they still kick at each other under the table). If I do manage to sit down during dinner, Dave and I can't talk at all because the boys make so much noise yakking loudly to each other. Sitting them next to each other is unthinkable.

It's often worse when Katrina is at the table, since then they bug her constantly, but then, there's no chance for Dave and I to sit at the same time anyway. Breakfast isn't so bad though.


As a result, dinners are stressful ordeals that Dave and I both just bear down and endure and can't wait until they're over. Family dinners keep families together? Where? It will be really really nice when we have a place to banish foul-mouthed loud gross little boys -- and soon, girl.

I had to spend most of the day at the house today, to keep an eye on the contractors my kitchen designer used for the kitchen installation. These guys weren't managed through our general contractor, and the difference is remarkable. These guys fit every contractor stereotype: late, uncommunicative, unprepared, try to get away with the bare minimum, heel-dragging, excuses. So I stayed all day to keep an eye on the guy. Sure enough, he expected only to have to install glass, and I made sure he didn't book out before I showed him the other items.

Not that hanging around our soon-to-be home is all bad....I'd forgotten how much I liked just being there. There are a lot of spaces, a lot of levels, a lot of views. That also means a lot of projects, and I gladly spent the morning making a tiny dent in the massive landscaping problem we have now. It's been a very, very long time since I've spent the better part of the day outside, working on the grounds, at our own home. It felt really good.

We're bracing ourselves for a very very busy next few days!

3/13/09

3/12/09 Back to Outback

Our house was thoroughly, completely cleaned today by a crew of about 6 people -- this makes it officially a HOUSE, not a jobsite!

And we passed final inspection today!!

This means there will be all sorts of work going on tomorrow there. The kitchen guys are supposed to finish up, neither upstairs nor downstairs heat works, lots of light fixtures to replace now that we've met and passed code, and numerous other doorstop-level details.

But I couldn't resist taking a peek and some photos after picking up our little brood. While they waited in the car, Dave and I ran through the house and checked it out.

The kitchen, minus cabinet glass, but otherwise complete.

(I sorta wish the backsplash had more oomph, but I can't take my eyes off that niche.)

The family room, viewed from the kitchen. Notice sunlight streaming in? That's why we did this.


One view of the guest suite. We have grandparent guests staying for a week next month, so they'll test it out for us!


Now, all this is leading up to: by the time we were done buzzing around the house, it was almost 6pm. So we booked it to Outback for dinner on a whim. I'm happy to say we can do this now, despite not having one accoutrement with us for a 2-year-old with us. Not that we use a lot at home anyway -- bibs, sometimes, if Katrina allows it, but sippy-cups and such have long since been abandoned. Most restaurants have what we need.

(One of my best toddler-restaurant survival tricks is to ask for an empty coffee mug, which all restaurants have. I pour some milk out of the styrofoam, lidded, strawed kid-cup and into a coffee mug, and she drinks out of that. Coffee mugs are heavy and stable and very difficult to knock over. The light styrofoam, especially with the straw to catch on reaching arms, are a sure-fire bet to get knocked over.)

We've been to Outback many times, but tonight the boys were mildly curious about the Australia thing. Gabriel asked, "Is this an Australian restaurant?" Like asking if Man Bo Duck is a Chinese restaurant. Then Julian asked, "Is this Australian butter?"

Incredibly, as we were gathering to go, a lady at the table next to us caught our attention and said severely, "Ma'am -- your children --" Uh-oh, I'm gonna get it now. Katrina was getting a little punchy and loud, signalling our time to exit. "Your children were so well-behaved!" Katrina, for once, didn't have us pacing her around the restaurant and outside, indeed, she was funny and delightful.

OK, this entire post was supposed to be about the Australian butter question, but it ran away with me.

Today was the last day I commute from our rental house to work. Next week, Dave and I are both taking the entire week off work. I think the grand act of putting our lives back in place deserves that.

3/12/09

3/11/09 The Baker

I performed an unnatural act tonight -- I went to a mall. That's because I performed a very natural act, procrastinating, and don't have time to order gift baskets in time for the open house this weekend.

I stopped by Williams-Sonoma to pick up a second mini-muffin tin, as I use mine a lot, and I often need a second tin. While checking out, the friendly salesman said cheerfully and slightly apologetically, "While you're here, do you need some paper liners that fit in this tin?" I shook my head, not bothering to look up. "Or maybe some cupcake mix?"

I raised my eyes and looked at him squarely. "M i x?" He hesitated, unsure if my flat tone came from ignorance or contempt, and started to say, "yeah, like if you want to m a k e...." My wilting gaze cut him off, he stopped, then burst out laughing, understanding. "OH! A scratch baker!"

And then we had a nice chat about the pros and cons of various bakeware. It was fun, and sort of validating. I like bringing reality to theory and when I have a riveted, fascinated audience to hear my compulsively detailed pro-con lists. He'd never heard of a very basic flaw in their ultra-adorable train pan, for instance (a pan I love): most consumers of train cakes are kids. But if you put frosting on a train cake, it covers all the detail. And kids want frosting on cakes!

I really have come a long way as a baker recently, in no small part because of our remodel project. I've baked something different, and often something I've never made before, every Thursday night to bring to the construction crew on Fridays. This was partly fueled by a personal challenge to use every scrap of fruit that entered my house, though don't pat me on the back for not being wasteful -- this meant many energy-sapping hours of a 350-degree oven. It was a great outlet to experiment and try new methods and recipes. I wouldn't dream of serving the guys Duncan Hines on Fridays.

So now, I stash a few mixes for emergencies, but if I'm in a time crunch, I'll buy a whole cake. If I'm really baking, then what's the point of a mix? And now I can rescue twice as much fruit, and waste twice as much energy, flour and sugar, in my two ovens.

3/11/09

p.s. Our front porch, almost done -- still some tape on the door, the doorbell button is missing, and those horrible code-passing flood lights on the walls need to be replaced after final inspection....but I just love this. This is one of the best views of the house. We hadn't planned to replace the old painted porch floor, but we had to, and I'm so glad.

3/10/09 The Medical Mistake

Last night, I got a message from the medical foundation where I'd gone to Urgent Care for my awful sore throat. The culture for strep came back negative, and I didn't need to continue taking the antibiotic they'd given me in case it was. Good, 'cause that stuff was nasty.

Tonight I got another call, following up, checking to see how I felt. I think that's the most shocking thing -- I'm not a regular patient there, but they called to follow up? Fascinating. I commented that I hated the antibiotic, I was glad I didn't need to take it. "What?" the nurse asked, "you tested positive for Strep-A."

I don't know, either I misunderstood or the nurse who'd left a message was reading someone else's chart, but this person double-checked and confirmed with the doctor: positive for strep. That explains that -- I'd had sore throats as a kid, and whatever I had last week was no ordinary sore throat, it was really, really, really painful.

Speaking of medical mistakes, Katrina has resumed her nightly dinnertime tantrums, pleased by nothing. The storm usually blows over suddenly; we just never know when it will. Tonight some brown basmati rice pilaf did the trick. Even after she's done tantruming, she's very demanding, never satisfied with the first choice of spoon or cup. Occasionally, she'll demand my attention just to tell me something: "MommyMommyMommyMommy..." [ I turn my head to face her ] "...I'm going to eat my RICE!"

Tonight she did that again: "MommyMommyMommyMommy..." and I went up to her and asked what she wanted. She rested her head against me and said, "I love you, Mommy."

I was absolutely blown away.

3/10/09

Lax Tax

Whee-haw, can I just gloat: taxes all done and filed and paid tonight. That's my Dad's taxes, our personal taxes and now, my corporation's taxes too.

I'm proud of myself, I did everything myself (I always do the personal, but now there's the business too), and I think I've figured out how pay myself from my corporation and Uncle Sam and keep it all kosher. We'll see when the tax man comes a-knocking next year. Meantime, no CEO-bashing, 'cause I'm all about excessive executive pay!

I still have some quarterlies to file with the state, but for the most part, I can let this go and concentrate on moving. And, Dave got all our address change stuff done too. We're ready to move now.

Please hold onto something so that my huge sigh of relief doesn't blow you over.

3/9/09 Daylight Savings Time

Literal, absolute-thinking Gabriel can't accept Daylight Savings Time. Yesterday when I'd mention the time, he say with great consternation, "NO IT ISN'T!" and then insist it was actually an hour earlier. "So WHAT if the clock says 7:00?" he'd say. "You still know it's really only 6:00." He thought it would be a mere matter of informing the teacher to get the school to reset the time.

But I really had to laugh this morning, when he said that it also wastes energy to have to turn on the lights in the morning. My mother will certainly chuckle at that too, because as a kid, I too was very offended by a daylight savings time change that forced us to get up earlier. That daylight savings change was made early, brought on by the energy crisis of the 1970s. I so hated getting up earlier -- still do -- that I wrote an angry letter to President Nixon, informing him of the error in his energy-saving logic: "...we get up and TURN THE LIGHTS ON!" Clearly he hadn't considered this unintended consequence and needed me to enlighten him!

One very fundamental difference between having babies and schoolkids is that daylight savings time that results in getting up "earlier" is a good thing with babies (Katrina was zonked well past the-new-7am), but it's a bad thing when you have to get kids to school on time. Unless, that is, the school changes its ways based on an angry letter from a know-it-all kid.

3/9/09

3/8/09 Ping-pong playdate

With moving and a big open house coming up, what better way to spend a Sunday afternoon than setting up a ping-pong table? Finalizing taxes, changing addresses, organizing and packing belongings -- who needs it?

My friend Laura offered to help me assemble the table, a baffling generous offer. I can't fathom having that kind of time right now, but she had second purpose: a playdate to keep her busy boy busy. It worked for me too, because the boys were dragging their heels about spending another afternoon at the house, but as soon as they heard Lance would be there, they were all over it.

So Laura and I built the table while the boys swung logs at the big dirt pile, chased each other, jumped off stepstones into a big mud puddle (a game that inexplicably got named "dinosaur chocolate"), and swatted balls into our neighbors' yard. Something tells me the neighbors might miss those nice quiet air compressors!

We got it done and then it was time to test it out.



I figured out how to keep things going: each boy takes turn hitting the ball 3 times, with me retrieving and bouncing it for them. They're all far, far away from actually keeping a rally going, or even hitting the ball back if it comes their way, but they had a great time trying. Even with their flailings and silliness, it looked to me like Julian was granted some talent in hitting and aiming the ball.

I really do think we're going to have fun with this. But who said this is for the kids? *I* like to play and I'm tired of not having a place to! Maybe not at an open house party in a muddy yard, but it was as good an excuse as any.

Now I really do have to get to those taxes.

3/8/09