2/11/08 The Scramble

Katrina greeted me this afternoon with a huge smile, and walked up to me happily, arms outstretched. And I got a shoulder kiss too, aww! Quite the change from the usual shriek and pushing away. I'm starting to like the little bugger!

I caught a few moments of her being very sweet after I put her in the car, kissing Julius.



And Gabriel's beloved Bear.



This morning was a big scramble, or could have been had I not scrambled the night before to prepare. I talked to the boys about getting up really early, packed my lunch, Gabriel's lunch and Julian's breakfast, and as usual, set out everyone's clothes (including mine).

Dave left for Phoenix at 5am, and I was on my own. Still, preparation paid off -- we were all on the road at 7am. Dropped off Katrina, dropped off Gabriel, dropped off Julian at 7:35 (5 minutes late, but 2 minutes after they opened 3 minutes late), and a Kids Inc lady helped him with his packed breakfast. I zoomed to Los Altos and arrived at my 7:45am appointment at 7:47am, where I proudly presented myself to my therapist.

"What are you doing here?" he asked. "Don't you have an appointment tomorrow?"

AAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2/11/08

2/10/08 The Shoes

I managed a photo-op this afternoon, which only happened because I didn't quite notice that Katrina was carrying around two markers and a glue stick. This never would have happened if I tried to take them away.

Dave took the boys to The Jungle today, for a birthday party of a classmate of Julian's. I suggested he bring Gabriel to play too, as a member of the general public. But, not being familiar with Jungle parties, it turned out that keeping Gabriel separate wasn't really practical, and the generous hosts of the party invited him in for pizza and cake. Once again, a Doudna boy crashed the other's party.

The boys both had a great time, but Dave witnessed an episode that furthers our concern about Gabriel's aggression, if we can call it that yet. Gabriel and a first-grader (and Julian to some extent) got involved in some game in the ball pool. Some conflict arose, shouting and throwing balls ensued, and in short order, the other kid decided he'd had enough and tried to get out. But Gabriel went after him and restrained him, holding his legs so he couldn't easily climb out of the ball pool. The kid got annoyed enough to whack Gabriel in the face, but Gabriel wouldn't let go. By then, Dave could see this was really conflict (it's hard to tell sometimes), and intervened to distract Gabriel so the kid got free. Dave said he could see then that Gabriel was truly angry that the kid got away. As usual, Gabriel wasn't at all deterred by the fact that the other kid was older and much bigger (Julian sidelined himself from the conflict).

And this morning, Julian was crying because Gabriel hit him with his teddy bear (usually a benign, but still obnoxious act), while Julian was in bed.

So, another "intervention" talk tonight. Gabriel clearly blames us for these talks, outraged that we're doing this "to him" again. We talked sternly again about hitting, reviewed the consequences with him, and told him that he wasn't getting any TV tonight. (I'd already sequestered Julian upstairs with a Wallace and Gromit video.) He started to cry angrily and then started in with the threats, claiming he was going to watch TV anyway. Incredibly, we managed to deflect it and talk about other things, and he got over it much more quickly than we expected.

This is new ground for us, the talking-tos and serious non-immediate consequences -- how and when to carry them out, for instance. We should have taken the TV away this morning when we first heard he'd hit Julian (he admitted it), but the TV-watching is also tied to cleaning up the family room. How would we have enforced that? Would the TV deprivation later in the day be too far removed from the offense for it to sink in? These are things we have to figure out.

Later in the day, something happened that caused me to get a good look at Gabriel's shoes. And Oh My Heavens -- talk about bad mom me! They were full of holes! Not only was much of the stitching worn off, causing holes at the seams, but the toes had holes worn through the rubber toe protector things. So after working out the logistics with Dave, I took the boys to Vallco to get Gabriel some badly needed new shoes.

On top of the awful condition of his shoes, he'd grown a size too. I guess this can happen if you don't put the kid's shoes on every day anymore!

After the shoes, even though it was 5:15pm and getting very late to be out, Gabriel gave me the little push I needed to go get my little scraggamuffins some haircuts. And, we pulled it off before Supercuts closed at 6pm. New shoes, haircuts...a banner day for accomplishments for me!

But nothing matches the challenge I face tomorrow morning. Dave is flying to Phoenix for the day, leaving the house at 5am. That leaves me with all three to get ready and drop off and make a 7:45am physical therapy appointment. If I can do that, anything's possible.

2/10/08

2/8/09 sink shopping

Gabriel and I went shopping for sinks today (kitchen and bathroom).

Splashworks in Willow Glen. I thought I'd settled on a kitchen sink until I saw this one. Why can't I be more like my friend Kristi, who told her husband to pick any old sink? I drive myself crazy!

Before leaving, I asked Gabriel if he wanted to come with me. Naturally, he asked where we were going. "San Jose," I said. He considered this, then said sincerely, "Oh, all right. I guess San Jose is OK!" Thank you, Gabriel -- a city of over 800,000 people breathes a huge sigh of relief at your endorsement!

We dared attempt going out to dinner tonight, at a new place nearby called Harvest. Abject failure: boys didn't eat dinner, Katrina would only eat Dave's rice, Dave didn't like having to cut chicken off the bones and that there were cranberries in his rice. I loved it, nice variety of interesting salads, and we ran into a 2004 mom + family who was also experimenting. They fared a lot better though.

But, Katrina had a FABULOUS time walking around, giggling her head off, and I LOVE that she will walk in places now. Still crawling sometimes, but the walking is SO SO SO much better -- I didn't have to carry her while we were ordering at the counter. Not only has she made a huge leap in mood and attitude, but the shaky baby-walking is unbelievably cute. I wish I had pictures of her today, her joy in walking is magnetic, infectious, relentlessly adorable. Naturally, I'm beside myself. WALKING IS MUUUUUCH BETTER FOLKS.

Dave said today that when he got Katrina up this morning (me: zzzzz...) she was kissing him! Nose, shoulder, arm. She was kissing Julian's knees yesterday too. Now this is a phase I can live with!

2/9/08

2/8/09 The Behavior

Today when I picked Gabriel up from the CDC, one of the teachers needed to talk to me about yet another infraction of Gabriel's: he'd just hit a kid who'd been Gabriel aside and reviewed with him what he's supposed to do in that situation (tell the kid to stop, tell a teacher, move away), and he knew, but he had no explanation for why he didn't do those things.

Then another teacher came over and said she too needed to talk to me about Gabriel attacking a kid with a hockey stick outside. I asked again if this was in play or aggressive, knowing the answer already with a sinking heart, and she said that while they're all playing around and of course hockey sticks tend to hit things, she felt what he did was out of line, going after someone for some reason she didn't see and he didn't care to explain.

Next, Gabriel's Friday Folder included a note from his teacher that said she'd been having the same problems with him in class as the CDC had been having -- and she wrote that before his two infractions this afternoon!

What's going on here? If it were any other kid, I'd think something were bothering him and causing him to lash out. That's possible, but that's really not his style. There is rarely any Deeper Meaning to his actions, rarely any chain of events that ties them together. It's usually in the moment and for the moment with him.

I thanked the CDC folks, and told them they have my full support in whatever consequences he has to deal with (no hockey for a month? Fine!). I explained that we know all too well how he can dish it out, we're not about to say this is odd behavior for him, though it's new that he's starting to act out so consistently around others.

So he got a Stern Talking-To tonight. Dave and I pulled him into the living room alone, which had a big impact as compared to sitting at the dining table with Katrina (who got a windfall of chocolate cookies for the occasion). He frowned and went between acting defensive and outraged and angry, but clearly didn't like being put on the spot. We told him in very firm, slightly angry tones, that he is absolutely not allowed to hit. I went through with him what his alternatives are, and he dutifully repeated them. We also told him that next time the teachers tell us he hit, he'll lose a highly-held privilege (Sunday TV, BMX park). Then some of the talks and readings I've attended over the years feebly kicked in, and I tried to be empathetic, telling him that we understand other kids make him mad sometimes and can be really annoying.

I'm not sure any of this sank in. Mostly, he didn't like the immediate situation, and even started to talk back and protest these talking-tos ("This is the THIRD TIME you've done this to me!" he said angrily). The formality of Dave and I sitting with him intervention-style was just enough to intimidate him -- this time. But did it do anything to stop the behavior? I doubt it. Kids are impulsive, and Gabriel has little empathy or fear to keep his behavior in check. His strong sense of order and rules is the best we have to go on. Maybe he has to get the cr*p beat out of him to connect that his big mouth and skinny little body are a bad combination.

It won't be long now before his first trip to the principal's office.

2/8/08

2/7/08 Music Day

This morning, instead of zooming out the door at 7:15am, I dressed Katrina, made breakfast for her and Julian, took Julian to pre-K, then took Katrina to music class at 9:30am. It was actually more hectic than my usual early mornings, since I had a lot more to do, but it was a really nice change.

And Katrina loved music class today! She lit up, bopped happily around the room, climbed on me, giggled aloud, stopped to pay attention to the teacher, then more playing. She really loved when the class stood up, and I held her hand and walked her around the room. I think she imitated one of the tonal patterns once too.

I'm so glad we're doing this; time alone with her is at a premium, and it was so nice for us both to be together doing something we both enjoy so much, with no distractions. She'd been under the weather for so long (and she still can't scream right) that it was so nice to see her so relaxed and animated and throwing herself into fun. It made me smile all day long to remember her happy little face.

2/7/08

2/8/08 It's all in the toes

I had my first physical therapy session this morning! I explained at length to Conrad, an Australian runner, the nature of my troubles. He explained back in far more detail than I can remember the biomechanics of the foot and leg.

After some testing, measuring and watching me move my feet, the results were in: I have weak toes!!

OK, there's more to it than that. Since there's no bleeding or obvious injury, all we can go on is highly educated guesses. My calves are actually very tight, not allowing enough flexion at the ankle and proper pushoff, especially up hills. Exercises to loosen calves, check.

But the real surprise was when he told me to curl my toes, and then was easily able to uncurl them with his fingers. The muscle that controls the toes also controls how your foot lands and pushes off, and should be much too strong for him to uncurl my toes. So it's a good guess that I must not be pushing off correctly, or in the right direction, especially up hills. So, exercises to strengthen my toes (no kidding!) are called for, like lifting a towel from the floor with just toes numerous times...isn't there a song about ankle bone being connected to the leg bone, the leg bone's connected to the....oh well. Exercises to strengthen feet via the toes, check.

So, ice, anti-inflammatories (I've heard conflicting things, but to heal the existing inflammation, OK), rest (wah), exercises, and then inserts/orthotics to correct the slight pronation and help train my foot to strike properly. All things I'd have considered to be minutiae -- but the persistent, nagging sensations around my ankles say otherwise. Oh yeah, or quit running. No.

Last night, Katrina got into some sort of snit when I tried to give her dinner -- food she likes, and she was hungry. I tried everything, including my usual final straw of taking her outside, still nothing but back-arching, screaming-crying, pushing my hand away. Fed up, I sat her down in the living room to go tend to the stove for the boys' dinner. I thought she'd come into the kitchen after a few minutes, looking for the sippy-cup of milk that can act as a moment-changer, but no, she pushed herself around on her back in the living room and cried angrily nonstop for a solid 20 minutes. I couldn't believe it -- a full-on, and LONG, tantrum (20 minutes is a long time for a 16-month-old!).

After I finally had the boys sitting down -- no mean feat, as Julian was giving me a hard time and I made several trips to the garage to put toys away -- then I tackled the toddler tantrum problem. I can't quite remember what I did, some combination of offering her something else, moving her somewhere new, distraction, and time, finally broke her down to take a few bites, and then we were finally on our way. Whew. She showed no signs of slowing down, either, it could easily have gone on had I not put my full attention to "redirecting.

I mentioned this episode to Melissa this morning, later thinking I was making too big a deal of it. But Melissa encountered the same exact thing today, unable to break her out of a major snit when her Plan for life was thwarted. Melissa remembers all the trouble we had with Gabriel, so she's prepared.

I can't believe I have another tantrumer on my hands! Yes, all toddlers have tantrums, but I know whence I speak when I say tantrumer!

One thing that's not like Gabriel, thank goodness: tonight, Dave was carrying Katrina, and for some reason, she bit his shirt. It wasn't quite malicious, but it's that classic experimental thing that can make it turn so, as Gabriel's pinching did (evolving into a nasty 1.5-year hitting problem). Dave gently scolded her, telling her nooo, not nice. And she pouted and cried!!!!! YIPPEEEE!!!!!

I love that I can decide at 8:35pm on a Wednesday night that the ends of my hair are too brittle and gross, and run out to Supercuts and get a trim and be home by 9pm.

Second night in a row I've felt the house shift. First one, there really was a small quake across the bay, so small Dave didn't even feel it downstairs (I was upstairs). Tonight, just paranoia. Or exhaustion. Or....?

2/8/08

2/5/08 The Math Homework

16 months old and still crawling! It's official. All three of my children are genuinely late walkers. Katrina is walking more than crawling now, but she still crawls when she really needs to get somewhere. Her walking is getting better and better, though she's started holding her hands above her head for balance, I think because she's trying to go faster. But it's still mostly a game, rather than a mode of transportation.

She did have fun walking around barefoot after I changed her and took her leggings off. First, I had to peel off a hugging brother.

Seeing her legs bare under a dress, I think her ankles are still pretty skinny!

I was intrigued today because Gabriel's math homework seemed to take a sudden leap in difficulty, with actual addition problems. So I scanned it to comment on that, but later realized that the page with addition problems was an "extras" page.

The regular math homework is simpler and more conceptual: draw a line under the longest item in each group, then draw the longest item overall in the box at the bottom, and is the sort of work Julian does too. (Gabriel did do it, but his light writing didn't scan well.)


But I think the "extras" page is a lot more advanced, or certainly a big step ahead of what the previous "extras" were. He finished both quickly without any trouble, though he didn't recognize the format in the 2+2 problem (that you write the answer under the line).

He also reads all the words, including the tiny-printed instructions at the bottom of the page for the grownups, and for the most part can follow their meaning. But he needed explanation for the "Are there enough?" problem: "Enough what?" he asked. (Hmm, is that climate discrimination? We don't wear mittens here!)

If we were the sort to push him, he could handle a lot more than this, I think. He was certainly more interested in the "extras" page, as each problem is shorter and it goes faster than work that involves drawing, as most of his homework does (like drawing the longest object on the regular homework page).

But really, he's just a kid, and mostly, he wanted to get back to assembling some Lego kits he got for his birthday. And I'm just fine with that.

2/5/08

2/4/08 The Return

Still not screaming, but Katrina is much, much more herself today. Melissa brought her home to me this afternoon, and she bopped around happily reading books, playing with balloons, getting into Gabriel's new Lego kits (he got two for his birthday and loves them).

Tonight was so completely back to normal -- the mad scramble -- that it's almost hard to remember that just this morning, I took my mother to the airport. It was such a wonderful visit that the fun of it all far outweighs the sadness of knowing it will be months before I see her again. One good thing about my long morning commute is that I call family a lot more often now -- might as well make use of my 30 minutes of captivity!

After dropping Mom off, I ran some errands, including a trip to Home Depot Expo. It helped remind me why I never bought anything there for the last remodel: too overwhelming, too underhelping. Why does every place display the most outrageous and funky bathrooms they can, instead of the 99% that the rest of us would actually use?

I saw my actual chosen rangetop, and didn't love it! I've seen it in range form, and in drop-in cooktop form, but not rangetop form. It looks so plain (even though I chose it partly for its looks), and I didn't like the knobs (even though I'd already tried them), they're a little thick and the plastic part is a little rough. The Viking knobs have as perfect a feel as they get, and suddenly the imposing grates look cool. This sort of indecision and doubt is exactly what undermines project schedules. I'm not changing cooktops now!

OK, fun's over. Back to work tomorrow.

2/4/08

2/3/08 The Party

What highly anticipated once-a-year major party event occurred today? Oh, you mean, the Superbowl?! Nope. Gabriel's gymnastics birthday party!

First, some other things happening around here. Bonne Maman brought a gift from our longtime family friend Francoise, a book titled "Ou est Charlie?" -- the French version of "Where's Waldo?" I had NO IDEA this would be such a hit. The boys LOVE it. Here's why neither of them bothered Katrina this morning:


Bonne Maman also got Katrina the world's most adorable socks from a nearby store in NYC. The brand is Little Miss Matched and they came up with the most clever idea of putting three socks into a set!

OK, now that's cute.

Now, onto the big stuff. Gabriel's party was a smashing success, at least in that no one actually got smashed (which is more than I can say for many of the other parties going on around the country today). I loved it, the kids had a great time, and it was exactly what I wanted: low-key, fun, under control, simple.

It helped that the first hour, they were all under the control of a highly capable gymnastics teacher. And, that most of the kids had done this sort of class before.



The one thing I felt terrible about is that siblings couldn't join -- we were limited to 8 total kids. Andrew had been coached carefully about this ahead of time by his aunt (Betsy was out of town), but he was really upset about not being able to participate. Meantime, I was busy setting up when the teacher lined up the kids for the class, and didn't notice that Julian had made his way into the mix. Whoops.

I let it go at first, since two kids were late and one didn't want to join in right away. But after about 10 minutes, the latecomers arrived and the other kid decided to join in, and now we were over capacity. But Julian was so well ensconced and having such a great time by then, I just couldn't bring myself to pull him out. The teacher let him stay and he didn't hold up the class or anything, as he's done this before. Still, it hardly seemed fair to Andrew (whose aunt had wisely taken him to go do something else).

Actually, the teacher had seemed greatly relieved when she asked me what the age range was before the class, and I told her the kids were all within months of 5-1/2, except the 4-year-old brother who wasn't supposed to join (eeps). (Come to think of it, maybe she let him stay since she knew he was the brother of the birthday boy.) She later said it was a really good group, easy to handle, overall calm, everyone participated and listened. Whew!

One of my favorite moments was when Gabriel's little pal from class, Anushka, kept giving him hugs, and he good-naturedly pushed her aside, rolling his eyes. He didn't want to be bugged at the moment, but he took it really well.

Then Parth joined in the action, and the three friends all laughed together.

It struck me seeing Gabriel interact with Parth in particular, a really nice boy who I talked to a lot at Gabriel's class party. Gabriel has his own friends now, not just friends he makes because I'm friends with their moms, and his own games and interactions with people I don't know at all. Gabriel and Parth and Anushka spend every day together in class and then at the CDC, more time with each other than he does with me. All part of the daily miracle, with a touch of tragedy, of growing up.

After the gymnastics class, the kids sat down and had some fruit cups, juice, popcorn and .... never mind -- don't I know enough by now that no food is of any interest after popcorn? So much for the sandwiches that Bonne Maman worked so carefully on cutting out in shapes!

(Notice who is the only one who didn't ask for a hat, and indeed refused to consider it.)

After a snack, we played musical chairs twice. A little advice about musical chairs: bring songs that don't already have stops in them! Andy Z doesn't work well for this. And, bring a boom box with some volume, instead of a wimpy little clock radio. And an extension cord!

Other than that, it worked well. Gabriel and Parth were the last two both times, with Gabriel the winner once, and a tie the second time. These two have played musical chairs at the CDC many times together, so apparently they've developed strategies. Gavin was my button man after he got eliminated, helping me turn the clock radio (urgh) on and off for the rest of the game.

Finally, the cake. More singing, more junk food. And, another Giant Cupcake cake.

By now, I should have some experience with my tricky Cupcake cake pan, but this one gave me by far the most trouble. First I made a Devil's Food (mix), split the batter across both pans. NG, the cupcake top was too small, but the bottom salvageable. Inexplicably, I used another flavor to make another top, but put too much batter in, overflowed the pan, and started a fire in my oven!! It took my Mom and I a few minutes to frantically scrape everything aside to put out the fire. Then, I had a hard time decorating the cake, using yellow frosting with yellow M&Ms, but all that did was make it look drab, and it just ended up looking like a lopsided tutu. The final straw was that I didn't use toothpicks to fasten the top to the bottom, and the top slid off in the car ride to ghe gymnastics place and one side got all smushed!

Of course, the kids didn't notice, they just wanted to eat the cake. Julian thanked me for putting candy on it. Mom and I were both intrigued that the two kids of Indian descent didn't want any. There's an Indian bakery nearby - I wonder what Indian kids have for sweets?

I've always suggested no gifts for parties, so as not to put any pressure on guests and because we really don't need MORE STUFF. But, something happened this time that makes me reconsider: the kids themselves want to give the birthday honoree gifts, they want to see the birthdayer open a gift that the guest picked himself. I had to pull Gabriel away at the end of the party as he'd started opening things because his friends wanted him to open things they'd brought. Next time, I will work in gift-opening, as it's so nice that his friends are so generous and want to enjoy the giving. And it's time Gabriel learned gracious gift-receiving too, instead of being handed a giant anonymous pile of loot later.

Score three for me -- all three kids' parties this "season" worked out great. I will definitely do a gymnastics party again, and 8 kids total is a perfect number. They all had such a great time, and it felt like such simple clean easy fun.

And good news on the sick baby front: Katrina's lung capacity is still nowhere near normal, but her behavior was on track tonight. She bopped around much more happily, played, scolded brothers, snuck upstairs, pulled things off shelves, and acted much more like herself, just "de-barked" as Dave called it (a reference to barky dogs who've had their vocal cords surgically altered so they're not impossible to live with). She even ate a little dinner tonight, so I think this strange episode is past us. I'm glad my Mom got to see a little of the normal Katrina tonight, and the normal interaction between her and her brothers (constant pestering, much tenderness and love).

I'm bringing Bonne Maman to the airport tomorrow, with joy and sadness. What a wonderful visit! It's been only a few days, but such full fun ones, rewarding and relaxing and intense all at the same time. We had lots of time to be mother and daughter, and grandmother and mother too. I can only hope for such wonderful times with my own children when they're all grown up.

2/3/08

2/2/08 The Photo Session

Ever really wanted to throw a child off a balcony? No, of course not, that's too extreme, right?

Reserve judgement: this morning, Katrina cried out at 6:20am. I got up to check her and found her door closed (we keep it open at night so her room doesn't get too cold). The boys' door was open (and it's closed at night). Gabriel was asleep, Julian...missing. Hmm. I quietly opened Katrina's door, and there was Julian, with his arm inside the crib, poking at Katrina. He'd gone into her room, closed her door, and now was trying to wake my sick baby. Where's that balcony?! I still want to strangle him when I think of that.

Perfect day for photos, overcast and rainy. Now if only the subjects would cooperate.

Mom and I took the boys to the Y this morning, where we attended a "sculpt" class. I'd never been to it and had no idea what to do. We asked a few clueless questions of the woman setting up next to us, who, as it turns out, didn't speak English well -- no surprise in Cupertino. But surprise -- she spoke French!

After the class and retrieving the boys, we collected acorns and then tried a photo session, but Julian wouldn't cooperate. And didn't fall for the usual "OK, no Julian in the picture" reverse psychology. And, he's been insisting on wearing his coat, hood and all, all day long, which makes for awful pictures.


But he was too interested in looking at Gabriel's Snap Circuits with Bonne Maman to object to this.


Bonne Maman had a fun project to do with the boys: she got us appliance-poor Doudnas a citrus juicer. To East Coasters, if you have an abundant orange tree in your front yard, it's criminal not to have a citrus juicer. The boys had a great time making OJ, though our oranges are not at their sweetest.


We never got to do a family birthday party for Gabriel on his birthday, as he and I went to the airport instead to pick up family. So, tonight we did a little cake and candle and opened birthday gifts.


Earlier in the day, I managed to find a moment in which all three kids were in decent shape and willing to take a photo. Not easy to pry Julian's hood off though! Katrina put up with this for only a few minutes, but it was just long enough to get something.


Katrina was still sick today, and not just sick, but really unhappy. Whatever's bothering her is in her lungs now, and she truly just can't scream at all. We've been giving her these breathing treatments, and they seem to help, but she still spends much of her time at home crying, and not eating. She did surprisingly well when Mom and I took her and the boys out to Diddam's and grocery shopping: her eyes cleared up, skin un-blotched, she smiled and made cute baby sounds and had a good time. Back indoors, right back to crying.

Poor thing, she's so uncomfortable. It's eerie, she's like a different person. I'm looking forward to my ornery, testy, demanding, screaming baby coming back!

2/2/08

2/1/08 The Lesson

Bonne Maman accompanied us to Katrina's 15-month appointment today, and helped me keep her entertained. This time, I asked the nurse if we could wait in the waiting room instead of in the exam room, which turned out to buy us about 10 minutes. It was still another 15-minute wait with a diapered baby in a room with nothing to do.

Well, except play with grandmother, that is. Katrina let Mom hold her and play with her, and was just as physical with her as she is with me.

And, Bonne Maman got treated to a rare cuddle.

She's still got a cold, and the doc thought she heard some wheezing inside her lungs, even though there's no sign of it from the outside. I realized today when a few times I'd have expected a scream from Katrina that she just can't.

Stats:

Katrina @16 months: 21 lbs 1 oz (25%), 31" long (70%).

(For the sake of useless comparison:)

Gabriel @ 16 months: 18 lbs 10 oz (0%), 31-1/4" long (45%)
Julian @15 months: 22lbs 2 oz (20%), 31-3/4" long (75%).

(Hmm, all I get out of that is that Gabriel is pathetic! And that I couldn't get two out of three to the pediatrician in time for 15-month appointments - how's that for pathetic?)

The doc was floored by her weight gain, going from 5%ile to 25%ile, and that's even while being under the weather and not eating well the past few days. Even her chicken-ankles have filled out.

Mom and I dropped Katrina off at Melissa's afterward, and went on to have a nice grownup lunch, a little browsing, more shopping, tea and a snack (those mini-tartelettes at Whole Foods are killer), then the onslaught of children.

Gabriel finally got his first piano lesson, sort of. My mother, the accomplished pianist, who performs, does chamber music, takes classes, practices for hours every day, showed him scales and chords and arpeggios and proper fingering....and then taught him to play Chopsticks! I mean, really!


He loved it, and so did she. She spent a lot of time with Julian on the little piano too, which he did for most of the evening tonight. I wish Melissa & Doug would make another songbook, as Julian knows all of them by heart now and is ready for more. Being 4, he treats it more like a toy than Gabriel does, who Bonne Maman thinks is genuinely interested in learning to play.

I'm sure we're in for nonstop Chopsticks this weekend.

2/1/08

1/31/08 First music class

It wasn't looking good. Katrina was grouchy and sniffly and miserable this morning, and barely ate any breakfast. I figured I'd at least make an appearance at music class, get the materials, and see if she'd last for a few minutes. And who knows, maybe she'd pull out a miracle and be fine in class.

Well, miracles do occur! She did great, and she loved it. As with most kids, as soon as the whole group starts doing the same thing together, especially with the teacher playing the flute, it caught her attention. She was interested, relaxed in short time, smiled, and even got up and wandered around. In fact, toward the end of the class, she just walked (and crawled, sigh) around the room and explored. She liked the instruments, she liked the group dynamic, and overall the whole thing was a smashing success. Not only was I immensely relieved, but it was a lot of fun! It was nice to be back in Music Together again.

Of course, any musical experience is greatly enhanced by having Bonne Maman there, as she likes anything music, and she participates and sings and dances along and acts goofy like everyone else.

Katrina looks a little different, huh? Maybe, like, a girl?

Well, that beautiful purple dress was a gift from Bonne Maman (from April Cornell), so Katrina had to model it. It isn't great for crawling, but at this point, anything that hinders crawling is fine with me. Also, her bangs are just too long, and I've been looking for things to keep them out of her eyes. It's hard to find simple baby barrettes that stay in, and I find these little pony-tail-holders to work OK, despite the fountain effect atop her head.

I can't believe it, but I think combing her hair and putting it back in the morning has become part of our daily routine. She's surprisingly cooperative about it. I never, ever comb the boys' hair in the morning, though they go to bed with it washed and combed, so it's not THAT bad. Gabriel and his lofty hair can get some pretty severe cases of pillow-head though -- severely funny, that is.

Mom and I (my mom that is!) then brought Katrina to Melissa's, and went to meet with my kitchen designer, to hammer down the final details. I completely caved on a few important things that I'd felt strongly about, and you know, I love the result. Everything fits so much better now -- and I may like having a microwave below the counter instead of 5" above my head! I'm thrilled. It was great and instructive to have my mother there for the kitchen details, pointing out things, giving me confidence about decisions, asking questions...44 years old and I still need my mommy!

And, we have an appointment with a promising contractor next week, and got a call back from another one. Boy, times must be tough if contractors call you back within a few hours.

Katrina still wasn't herself tonight, as she hardly ever screamed and was pretty mellow, but she was a lot better than yesterday. She didn't nap much today, and didn't eat very well, but she seems to be on the mend.

It sort of goes without saying that the boys are having a fabulous time with Bonne Maman, but it's nice to say anyway. Gabriel is happily showing off, and Julian is acting like a lovesick puppy (aww, such a sweetie pie).

1/31/08

1/30/08 Six Years Old!

Did a little party for Gabriel at recess at school today. I brought cupcakes for all 18 of the PMers in his class.

It was another boy's birthday too, so I brought two candles. Gabriel's teacher acknowledged it's hard to make cupcakes healthy, but she has to ask. So I made carrot cake, with half whole-wheat flour....well, sort of. Nothing healthy about the frosting though.


Gabriel came with me to pick up Bonne Maman at the airport. He'd made his own sign to find her, so he joined the other limo drivers for a photo-op. Passersby found this scene very amusing.

Katrina's sick! Wah! We'll poke our head into her first Music Together class tomorrow, and depending on how she's doing, maybe stay a little bit. I'm bummed, I was really curious to see how she'd like it.

I've been a Mom six years today! Yay!

1/30/08

1/29/08 The Walk

I went for an exercise walk at lunch today, driving to the creek trail I'd normally run to, making for about a 2-1/2 mile loop. I managed to stick with a power-walk for a while, then let myself break into an easy trot, back down to walk, then more light jogging. At first it was hard to run, I was winded, but it wasn't long before I settled into a rhythm. It was SO fun to be moving again, feeling the wind on my face, looking at the sky, listening to my iPod, and being immersed in the stormy outdoors. I had to tell myself, "at that next signpost, back to a walk....ok, the next signpost....oh, ok, one more...." I probably ran about a mile all told. My ankles had been feeling better and I've been strengthen-exercising them, and I was using the insoles that the sports podiatrist had adjusted for me.

Hours later, both insides of my ankles started screaming at me, right under the inner anklebone. They didn't bother me during the run, which I guess is an improvement, but this is very discouraging! It took months and many miles for the first twinge to develop, and now, it takes barely a mile of gentle trotting for the pain to return full-on. I'm finding myself feeling jealous of people who have healthy tibialis tendons and don't make use of them running. Not fair, I'd use them! I'll trade you!

Well, I deliberately tested it today to see what little I could get away with, and I have my answer. Lots more time off. Walking doesn't seem to bother it, but walking just isn't the same. Fooey.

Testing limits is an ongoing theme around here. Katrina has to be on whatever floor she's not these days -- if she's downstairs, she makes her way upstairs, and if she's upstairs, she makes her way down. I guess I'm supposed to be more paranoid about her being on stairs unattended, but I've lost track of her so many times now, it's hard to get too worried. Besides, Gabriel went down stairs headfirst, sliding on his chest, laughing the whole way. Julian did tumble down once, and I could hear him: boom boom boom WAH boom boom WA- boom WAH-AH-AHH! I've been through it already. My paranoia is weary. Such is the plight of the third child.

She's more careful than Gabriel was, and more confident and coordinated than Julian (who was probably the least stair-safe). Her worst hazard so far is getting stuck from her sideways method of going down, which involves using her head for balance.

Actually, her worst hazard is being discovered and whisked away, because, as you can all easily predict now, her reaction is violent, vocal and VERY LOUD!

Still crawling though. I think it's safe to say that she's going to reach 16 months old without a crawl-free day. At least the walking is getting a little steadier, though she still treats it like an exciting excursion instead of something you just do.

I wish I could get that excited about walking.

1/29/08

1/28/08 The Driver

Gabriel's homework tonight included an "extra," which was to write down who is important to his family, and why. Gabriel took one look at this and said NO WAY. He relented a teeny bit when I said, "What about Katrina, isn't she important to you?" and he answered, "yeah, because she's cute....but NO WAY MOM I'M NOT DOING THAT." And that was that.

Julian, listening to this exchange, piped in, "I know who's important!" So I asked, "Who?" and he said, "Mom!" Awww. I gave him a kiss and then asked him why. "Because Mom's the driver," he answered.

Pretty profound for a kid, huh?

Actually, I think he literally meant that I'm the one who drives the car when I pick him up. But I'll savor the ambiguity for now.

1/28/08

1/27/08 Forward-faced

Katrina opened a late and lost Christmas present today, these cute little squeaky eggs. She loved them! She laughed aloud at them and played with them for much of the morning and later in the afternoon. Then some or other brother put them away, and for the moment, they're lost. [ later note: found in an obscure drawer after brother #1 'fessed up! ]















After much wrangling, we managed to forward-face Katrina's seat and get two booster seats in the back of my car (minus one armrest, and by installing Katrina's seat with the seatbelt instead of LATCH). This was harder than it'd seem, since the boosters don't nest the way the old carseats do, and when the seatbelt is buckled, the buckle is held up in such a position that it's right between two hard parts of the booster seats. It's going to take some practice to learn how to get everyone in and out quickly.

Julian's only sitting in the middle because I enticed him to come to the Y by getting to choose which seat he sat in (Gabriel said he didn't want to go). Sitting next to Katrina is the carseat prize, which at the last minute, Gabriel wanted to reclaim. I kept my promise to Julian, but he's really not trustworthy enough yet. I caught him poking at her cheeks with his fingers, and he also provoked her into screaming (admittedly not hard to do) by making faces at her. Gabriel is more reliable for now.

Katrina loved facing forward, and I could see her gazing out with fascination at the scenery passing by in the right direction. I thought our Britax Marathon would dwarf her, but it fits her pretty well.

Another rainy day. When I lived in Rochester, NY, I grew to hate rainy days. Now, despite the many weeks in a row we've had, I still like them. I would probably feel a lot differently if I didn't have a reliable place to go on rainy weekend mornings, to get the kids out and to get in a workout myself. Thank goodness for the Y.

1/27/08