I'm SOOO behind in scrapbooking. So behind that I have to pare it down to something that will mean something to them someday: So, a school book for each kid. Two pages summing up their school experience for each grade, school and class photos, projects, notable moments, outside activities, report cards and awards.
So, while tackling this project, I came across Gabriel's STAR Student Report. Starting in the 2nd grade, all schools in California spend two weeks performing standardized tests on 2nd - 8th graders, for which the scores get summed up into the ever-important "API" for the school. Scoff not! Your local school's API score has a lot to do with your real estate's value.
Then there's a Web site that shows how all California schools did on average (STAR Test Results 2010). Naturally, I had to compare.
I learned a few things. First, while our school isn't the highest-scoring in the district, it's up there. Really, no need to worry about a kid who goes to Collins. (Do worry about the parents of the kids who go to Collins, because in this demographic, the higher scores reflect a hyper-paranoid parent population, and the schools that did better have even more paranoid parents.)
Next, for some reason at our school, and comparably-scored ones (Stocklmeir, Garden Gate, Stevens Creek Elementary), the 3rd-grade mean math scores are higher than any other grade. Maybe that's because the difficulty takes a leap in 4th grade, doesn't take a big leap from 2nd to 3rd.
Then I learned that my son is in 3rd grade now and that I should be looking at the 2nd grade scores, which is what he was in when he took the test. Hel-LO! OK, so I wrote this whole thing and now have to start over.
Seems our school's 3rd-graders are among the best in Language Arts, but not the 2nd-graders, where its average of 409 out of 600 for 2nd-graders is well below those of the top schools. The big surprise here is that Gabriel's score of 491 out of 600 is above the best averages I could find at any school (460 at Garden Gate but I didn't look at all of them).
Math...well, not so much. His score was 488 out of 600 -- in the Advanced level as pretty much all kids at his school are -- but below average for many of the schools in the district. Just above average at his school, where Collins' 2nd-graders averaged 466.
Still, overall math averages were higher than Language Arts at all schools (that's with selecting for English proficiency). So what's with our digital kid doing better in the analog world? Gabriel resists writing, expresses his creativity in very digital mathematical terms (like all his electronics circuits), claims to hate language arts, and doesn't challenge himself much with reading. Yet he did better in the language than the math, and not great on either compared to what he could do.
And why with all his early promise in math isn't be blowing the math scores away, especially with all his arrogant claims of the tests being so easy?
I'm not super big on standardized tests, but it does give you a calibration point about parent demographics at the schools. I firmly believe the scores reflect the parent population far moreso than the kids or teachers. Faria parents REALLY REALLY want the high scores, they're going to push their kids to get them. McAuliffe parents embrace a "whole learning" philosophy, and many opt out of the testing. Collins parents like me are sheep and just go with it -- though if Gabriel had done very very poorly, it'd have been a flag for action, given the highly privileged circumstances he comes from.
Still, it is interesting that a toddler who had a serious language delay, hadn't said a word by age 2, and needed speech therapy, but who could calculate clock time before he was 4, would do better in language arts than math at age 8. And interesting that a kid who shows such ability in certain things tests pretty average.
I'm OK with "average," and I'm OK with "I really don't get this," but I'm not OK with not doing your best.
Now, back to scrapping the good stuff!
11/28/2010
Saturday, November 27, 2010
11/27/2010 Rainy Day Bowling
I've had this in my back pocket for months now: what to do on a rainy day when the kids really need to get out? Bowling!
Strike (now named Bowlmor) is closeby and perfect for kids, since you can program gutter bumpers up or down on a per-player basis. The boys have been there before on CDC field trips, and of course we had Gabriel's 6th birthday party there, so they were thrilled at this idea. And, I like to bowl.
This helped them get over the fact that they were not going to breakfast with Dad -- a coveted weekend morning affair. He's fed up with their constant messing around, making noise, shoving each other and arguing, and is still ticked off about their horrible behavior at the car show yesterday. Taking just Katrina, on the other hand, is a pleasant, relaxing cutefest.
So, boys had a quick breakfast at home, and off we went.
Both boys opted for bumpers, and Julian started off using the ramp, but gave it up to throw the ball like a man. Neither can be persuaded that a bowling ball is not meant to be thrown like a football and that it can be better handled with fingers in the holes.
Not easy to take photos in a dimly lit bowling alley.
I was typically inconsistent, and though I threw a double strike once, that game had my lowest score of the three games we did.
A couple of sliders (hamburgers), fries, lemonade, some classic rock music in the background...all we needed was a few beers!
11/27/2010
Strike (now named Bowlmor) is closeby and perfect for kids, since you can program gutter bumpers up or down on a per-player basis. The boys have been there before on CDC field trips, and of course we had Gabriel's 6th birthday party there, so they were thrilled at this idea. And, I like to bowl.
This helped them get over the fact that they were not going to breakfast with Dad -- a coveted weekend morning affair. He's fed up with their constant messing around, making noise, shoving each other and arguing, and is still ticked off about their horrible behavior at the car show yesterday. Taking just Katrina, on the other hand, is a pleasant, relaxing cutefest.
So, boys had a quick breakfast at home, and off we went.
Both boys opted for bumpers, and Julian started off using the ramp, but gave it up to throw the ball like a man. Neither can be persuaded that a bowling ball is not meant to be thrown like a football and that it can be better handled with fingers in the holes.
Not easy to take photos in a dimly lit bowling alley.
I was typically inconsistent, and though I threw a double strike once, that game had my lowest score of the three games we did.
A couple of sliders (hamburgers), fries, lemonade, some classic rock music in the background...all we needed was a few beers!
11/27/2010
Friday, November 26, 2010
11/26/2010 Car show
It wasn't a bad idea, but the execution? Ugh.
We drove to San Francisco today to see the International Car Show. The idea was to peruse through the options in one place and decide which dealerships to actually spend time in. Who knows, maybe there's a type of car that could work for us that we hadn't thought of before?
The kids "helped" us look at cars by climbing in the back seats and putting on seatbelts. In every car we tried, the boys would still need boosters to position the shoulder belt properly. Julian clearly needs some additional help with this concept.
Mostly, we were just trying to keep them busy as their enthusiasm for our research venture started to fade about 5 minutes into it.
There are times I wish we had a car with a 3rd row, for when we have adult visitors. Most 7-seater non-minivans (and even some minivans) can only fit kids in the 3rd row, but guess what -- we have those. It's highly likely that if we needed to transport 7 people, at least two of them would fit in the back.
This back 3rd row was especially spacious. (My picture-taking was very random and I'm not sure what car this was, but this 3rd row was one of the better ones -- the Hyundai Veracruz maybe.)
But guess what else we learned about 3rd-row SUVs: you sacrifice a real middle seat in the 2nd row. Look to the left of the measuring tape in the photo. See that small gap between the two seats? That's the remnant of the 2nd-row middle seat, and only if you lift the dividing console up. It's just not a real seat. (That's Katrina modelling the 3rd-row seat.)
One of our 3 kids really is going to spend time in the middle seat -- it's not just to squeeze another grownup in for a quick lunch run at work. I can't remember which car this was, but was either a Hyundai Veracruz, a Mazda CX-9 or a Toyota Highlander, all of which suffered this absurd tradeoff.
All those cars were too big anyway, which is why we didn't even test-sit a Honda Pilot (would even Honda make that blunder too?!).
But by the time we got to this level of realization, the kids were running out of steam fast. Julian was non-stop hyper-pestering, running into people, hands all over Katrina, throwing himself on the floor of the cars and refusing to get out. Katrina overall was OK, but Gabriel was the worst, and not in a way he's known for: he whined. Whined! Complained! Vociferously objected to how BOOOORING this was! Actually, even his whining is intense whining, not the draggy sort of whining. It was directed, stinging, "See how unhappy you make everyone by taking us to this STUPID thing?!" Cripes! Before long, we were more anxious to leave than they were.
Truth is, I'm not crazy about convention centers and crowds either, but an hour there could save many hours later driving around to dealerships just to rule out things like big SUVs with bogus middle seats. Still, it was a big disappointment to Dave -- a car show! The motherlode! This should be fun! Instead, we could barely exchange a few words together.
We did learn a few things however (other than leaving kids at home next time). I was delightfully very surprised when I sat in a Hyundai Tucson, then a Hyundai Santa Fe. Incredibly, I could reach the foot pedals without having intimate relations with the steering wheel! Most cars are just not made for shorter drivers. Only in my beloved old Honda Accord was I able to sit comfortably with the steering wheel at arm's length. In my Subaru, the steering wheel is just a teensy bit too close for comfort. I never understood this -- putting the steering wheel and pedals closer together and giving more arm-room is more comfortable for shorter and taller drivers, why don't more cars do that?
Another major annoyance was that most cars now have electronic hatch-opening and electric driver-seat adjustments -- and many many cars have dead batteries at a car show. So I couldn't adjust many driver's seats to see how I'd fit, and some rear hatches we couldn't open to peek in.
Fortunately the Hyundais all had working batteries. Overall I thought the Hyundai SUVs were really nice, well-priced, decent gas mileage, and they come in a manual transmission if we still insist on one. Hmm! This is exactly the surprise we were looking for.
The Ford Edge was another "crossover" we went to look at. Blah. Overpriced, cheesy fit & finish, some afterthought sorts of things (like an intrusive bar on the rear gate that is probably for auto-open/lift). That was a fast no.
Dave ruled out the Honda CRV because it doesn't have a manu-matic. I LOVE the CRV's driver's armrest, but otherwise the CRV didn't do that much for me, to my dismay. Still, it is a Honda and other than the restrictive transmission there was nothing to rule it out. After 16-1/2 happy years with my 1983 Accord, I am forever a Honda person.
Neither of us liked the Toyota Rav4, and Dave pointed out that the side-opening rear hatch could be a real problem if the car is parked on a slope. A Kia crossover also didn't thrill, nor did the Nissan Murano and Rogue. Dave didn't even want to consider a Volkswagen given the problems the company has had. Then again, kid-meltdowns were well on their way and we were having a harder and harder time looking at the cars.
We didn't go near any of the higher-end brands: Lexus, Acura, Volvo, Audi, Mercedes, BMW. Just no need for that.
Our real objective was to sit in the newer Subaru Outbacks, still the top candidate. After all that SUV-sitting, the Outback felt so .... well, familiar. And carlike. I only had a few minutes in the new Outback before I had to start hiding from our children and pretending we weren't the ones responsible for these ill-mannered, out-of-control brats, but after all the SUVs I'd sat in, it felt very much like my own car (even if it is 9 years newer).
And can I let go of the idea that an Outback fits our lifestyle? I chatted briefly with a very nice woman who has dogs, camps a lot, and does triathlons -- this is the demographic Subaru is after! She seemed so cool, I wish I could have sat and dished at a Starbucks with her for a while. But she certainly isn't us -- though we'd like to think of ourselves as the cool hip adventurous Outback types, our driving reality is that of minivan-life. My Outback is little more than a mommymobile. But I intend to cling to denial as long as possible.
That said, there is one last development in our lives that could actually justify the Outback or some 4WD SUV. Remember we did our first snow trip last March, and my enthusiasm and excitement about snow and skiing hasn't waned one bit. And I'm also newly wild about camping with kids. And these really are good reasons to pick a car that is well-suited to outdoor activities. Not that an Accord sedan would stop us, but loading up for a weekend away is a whole lot easier in my Outback. And Outbacks look cool with dirt on them. Other cars just look dirty. 'Cause you know, cars are all about image, right? You are what you drive, right? Seems I'm just as prone to the vehicular ego trip as a tricked-out low-profiled bass-booming Civic driven by a short Asian guy!
So in the end, my short list is: the Subaru Outback and the Hyundai Santa Fe. Second tier is the Honda CR-V, Mazda CX-7 and Toyota Venza (didn't get a chance to see it, thanks kids, but my Outback friend suggested it).
No actual car purchases will occur until our mortgage refinance is complete -- this is not the time for new credit inquiries -- but that gives us plenty of time to do some test-driving and soul-searching (and, apparently, image-preening). Without our bratty little brood.
11/26/2010
We drove to San Francisco today to see the International Car Show. The idea was to peruse through the options in one place and decide which dealerships to actually spend time in. Who knows, maybe there's a type of car that could work for us that we hadn't thought of before?
The kids "helped" us look at cars by climbing in the back seats and putting on seatbelts. In every car we tried, the boys would still need boosters to position the shoulder belt properly. Julian clearly needs some additional help with this concept.
Mostly, we were just trying to keep them busy as their enthusiasm for our research venture started to fade about 5 minutes into it.
There are times I wish we had a car with a 3rd row, for when we have adult visitors. Most 7-seater non-minivans (and even some minivans) can only fit kids in the 3rd row, but guess what -- we have those. It's highly likely that if we needed to transport 7 people, at least two of them would fit in the back.
This back 3rd row was especially spacious. (My picture-taking was very random and I'm not sure what car this was, but this 3rd row was one of the better ones -- the Hyundai Veracruz maybe.)
But guess what else we learned about 3rd-row SUVs: you sacrifice a real middle seat in the 2nd row. Look to the left of the measuring tape in the photo. See that small gap between the two seats? That's the remnant of the 2nd-row middle seat, and only if you lift the dividing console up. It's just not a real seat. (That's Katrina modelling the 3rd-row seat.)
One of our 3 kids really is going to spend time in the middle seat -- it's not just to squeeze another grownup in for a quick lunch run at work. I can't remember which car this was, but was either a Hyundai Veracruz, a Mazda CX-9 or a Toyota Highlander, all of which suffered this absurd tradeoff.
All those cars were too big anyway, which is why we didn't even test-sit a Honda Pilot (would even Honda make that blunder too?!).
But by the time we got to this level of realization, the kids were running out of steam fast. Julian was non-stop hyper-pestering, running into people, hands all over Katrina, throwing himself on the floor of the cars and refusing to get out. Katrina overall was OK, but Gabriel was the worst, and not in a way he's known for: he whined. Whined! Complained! Vociferously objected to how BOOOORING this was! Actually, even his whining is intense whining, not the draggy sort of whining. It was directed, stinging, "See how unhappy you make everyone by taking us to this STUPID thing?!" Cripes! Before long, we were more anxious to leave than they were.
Truth is, I'm not crazy about convention centers and crowds either, but an hour there could save many hours later driving around to dealerships just to rule out things like big SUVs with bogus middle seats. Still, it was a big disappointment to Dave -- a car show! The motherlode! This should be fun! Instead, we could barely exchange a few words together.
We did learn a few things however (other than leaving kids at home next time). I was delightfully very surprised when I sat in a Hyundai Tucson, then a Hyundai Santa Fe. Incredibly, I could reach the foot pedals without having intimate relations with the steering wheel! Most cars are just not made for shorter drivers. Only in my beloved old Honda Accord was I able to sit comfortably with the steering wheel at arm's length. In my Subaru, the steering wheel is just a teensy bit too close for comfort. I never understood this -- putting the steering wheel and pedals closer together and giving more arm-room is more comfortable for shorter and taller drivers, why don't more cars do that?
Another major annoyance was that most cars now have electronic hatch-opening and electric driver-seat adjustments -- and many many cars have dead batteries at a car show. So I couldn't adjust many driver's seats to see how I'd fit, and some rear hatches we couldn't open to peek in.
Fortunately the Hyundais all had working batteries. Overall I thought the Hyundai SUVs were really nice, well-priced, decent gas mileage, and they come in a manual transmission if we still insist on one. Hmm! This is exactly the surprise we were looking for.
The Ford Edge was another "crossover" we went to look at. Blah. Overpriced, cheesy fit & finish, some afterthought sorts of things (like an intrusive bar on the rear gate that is probably for auto-open/lift). That was a fast no.
Dave ruled out the Honda CRV because it doesn't have a manu-matic. I LOVE the CRV's driver's armrest, but otherwise the CRV didn't do that much for me, to my dismay. Still, it is a Honda and other than the restrictive transmission there was nothing to rule it out. After 16-1/2 happy years with my 1983 Accord, I am forever a Honda person.
Neither of us liked the Toyota Rav4, and Dave pointed out that the side-opening rear hatch could be a real problem if the car is parked on a slope. A Kia crossover also didn't thrill, nor did the Nissan Murano and Rogue. Dave didn't even want to consider a Volkswagen given the problems the company has had. Then again, kid-meltdowns were well on their way and we were having a harder and harder time looking at the cars.
We didn't go near any of the higher-end brands: Lexus, Acura, Volvo, Audi, Mercedes, BMW. Just no need for that.
Our real objective was to sit in the newer Subaru Outbacks, still the top candidate. After all that SUV-sitting, the Outback felt so .... well, familiar. And carlike. I only had a few minutes in the new Outback before I had to start hiding from our children and pretending we weren't the ones responsible for these ill-mannered, out-of-control brats, but after all the SUVs I'd sat in, it felt very much like my own car (even if it is 9 years newer).
And can I let go of the idea that an Outback fits our lifestyle? I chatted briefly with a very nice woman who has dogs, camps a lot, and does triathlons -- this is the demographic Subaru is after! She seemed so cool, I wish I could have sat and dished at a Starbucks with her for a while. But she certainly isn't us -- though we'd like to think of ourselves as the cool hip adventurous Outback types, our driving reality is that of minivan-life. My Outback is little more than a mommymobile. But I intend to cling to denial as long as possible.
That said, there is one last development in our lives that could actually justify the Outback or some 4WD SUV. Remember we did our first snow trip last March, and my enthusiasm and excitement about snow and skiing hasn't waned one bit. And I'm also newly wild about camping with kids. And these really are good reasons to pick a car that is well-suited to outdoor activities. Not that an Accord sedan would stop us, but loading up for a weekend away is a whole lot easier in my Outback. And Outbacks look cool with dirt on them. Other cars just look dirty. 'Cause you know, cars are all about image, right? You are what you drive, right? Seems I'm just as prone to the vehicular ego trip as a tricked-out low-profiled bass-booming Civic driven by a short Asian guy!
So in the end, my short list is: the Subaru Outback and the Hyundai Santa Fe. Second tier is the Honda CR-V, Mazda CX-7 and Toyota Venza (didn't get a chance to see it, thanks kids, but my Outback friend suggested it).
No actual car purchases will occur until our mortgage refinance is complete -- this is not the time for new credit inquiries -- but that gives us plenty of time to do some test-driving and soul-searching (and, apparently, image-preening). Without our bratty little brood.
11/26/2010
Thursday, November 25, 2010
11/25/10 Jedi Battles on Thanksgiving Day
What an AWESOME Thanksgiving Day!
OK, it didn't start out so well. Sometime after midnight, Gabriel threw up all over his bed, bedding, animals and everything on the bed, starting a multi-hour "hurlfest." (He pointed out that since it was after midnight, it was "definitely Thursday.") I scrambled to clean it up and set up a new bed for him on the floor while he was in the bath. He threw up twice more, once while he was up already (no cleanup) and once again in his makeshift bed on the floor (complete bedding/pajama replacement again). I didn't get to sleep until 3:15.
But, thanks to my recently acquired cooking experience and my favorite celebrity chef, I'd done most of the prep Wednesday (with lots of help), and didn't have all that much to do Thursday. Oh, cornbread here, mashed potatoes there, but these aren't big deals. Baking takes a lot longer.
So before the big feast we all walked to the small park near our house. Ryan and the boys have invented a pretty elaborate "Jedi Battle" game, and the boys were anxious to play it. Katrina joined us, and she was bursting with joy at running around outside, playing on the slides, and being tossed in the air.
The Jedi Battles are fun. It's a lot like fencing, but there are rules: A set of Jedi Judges say "charge!" when the battle starts, and watch to see if one Jedi scores a sufficient hit on the other to win. If you get your leg "cut off" then you have to hop; if both are "cut off" you have to stay in one place. Both Jedis can use The Force three times, which is thrusting their hand out and the other Jedi is forced back.
Gabriel and Julian had some epic battles, Julian with Ryan's light saber (this Uncle comes with his own light saber!) and Gabriel with his double-saber, courtesy of duct tape. So interesting watching my sons be boys together. Julian had an advantage since his single light-saber was easier to handle, but still, he has more finesse and accuracy, while Gabriel is more aggressive.
Katrina had to get into the action too.
The Jedi Judges.
Jedi Laura took Jedi Julian on while Gabriel and Katrina judged.
Then an epic battle between Jedi Ryan and Jedi Katrina!
Use The Force!
Katrina and I left the fun a little early to go home and check on the turkey. Before long, a complete dinner spread was ready to go!
OK, OK, we didn't really need this much food, but it sure was fun and we weren't lacking for variety. Turkey, mashed potatoes, yams, brussel sprouts, cauliflower, two kinds of stuffing, cranberry sauce, gravy, cornbread, dinner rolls, pumpkin pie, apple galette, pecan butter tarts, and several kinds of wine, including mulled. Oh yeah, and a chocolate turkey!
Then we had a wonderful family Thanksgiving dinner together. We ate a ton (except Katrina who ate only broccoli and cornbread), drank a lot of wine, traded stories. Gabriel seemed OK, a little lower-key than usual but he wanted to eat despite his tummy troubles last night.
The most popular dish was -- get this -- the brussel sprouts! They were made from a nice simple Jacques Pepin recipe in a book that Mom gave me, and made by Ryan, who is very knowledgeable about cooking brussel sprouts. Ryan definitely has a touch when it comes to cooking.
We wrapped it up with a movie (Toy Story), dessert, more wine, more family time. This is what Thanksgiving is about!
11/25/2010
OK, it didn't start out so well. Sometime after midnight, Gabriel threw up all over his bed, bedding, animals and everything on the bed, starting a multi-hour "hurlfest." (He pointed out that since it was after midnight, it was "definitely Thursday.") I scrambled to clean it up and set up a new bed for him on the floor while he was in the bath. He threw up twice more, once while he was up already (no cleanup) and once again in his makeshift bed on the floor (complete bedding/pajama replacement again). I didn't get to sleep until 3:15.
But, thanks to my recently acquired cooking experience and my favorite celebrity chef, I'd done most of the prep Wednesday (with lots of help), and didn't have all that much to do Thursday. Oh, cornbread here, mashed potatoes there, but these aren't big deals. Baking takes a lot longer.
So before the big feast we all walked to the small park near our house. Ryan and the boys have invented a pretty elaborate "Jedi Battle" game, and the boys were anxious to play it. Katrina joined us, and she was bursting with joy at running around outside, playing on the slides, and being tossed in the air.
The Jedi Battles are fun. It's a lot like fencing, but there are rules: A set of Jedi Judges say "charge!" when the battle starts, and watch to see if one Jedi scores a sufficient hit on the other to win. If you get your leg "cut off" then you have to hop; if both are "cut off" you have to stay in one place. Both Jedis can use The Force three times, which is thrusting their hand out and the other Jedi is forced back.
Gabriel and Julian had some epic battles, Julian with Ryan's light saber (this Uncle comes with his own light saber!) and Gabriel with his double-saber, courtesy of duct tape. So interesting watching my sons be boys together. Julian had an advantage since his single light-saber was easier to handle, but still, he has more finesse and accuracy, while Gabriel is more aggressive.
Katrina had to get into the action too.
The Jedi Judges.
Jedi Laura took Jedi Julian on while Gabriel and Katrina judged.
Then an epic battle between Jedi Ryan and Jedi Katrina!
Use The Force!
Katrina and I left the fun a little early to go home and check on the turkey. Before long, a complete dinner spread was ready to go!
OK, OK, we didn't really need this much food, but it sure was fun and we weren't lacking for variety. Turkey, mashed potatoes, yams, brussel sprouts, cauliflower, two kinds of stuffing, cranberry sauce, gravy, cornbread, dinner rolls, pumpkin pie, apple galette, pecan butter tarts, and several kinds of wine, including mulled. Oh yeah, and a chocolate turkey!
Then we had a wonderful family Thanksgiving dinner together. We ate a ton (except Katrina who ate only broccoli and cornbread), drank a lot of wine, traded stories. Gabriel seemed OK, a little lower-key than usual but he wanted to eat despite his tummy troubles last night.
The most popular dish was -- get this -- the brussel sprouts! They were made from a nice simple Jacques Pepin recipe in a book that Mom gave me, and made by Ryan, who is very knowledgeable about cooking brussel sprouts. Ryan definitely has a touch when it comes to cooking.
We wrapped it up with a movie (Toy Story), dessert, more wine, more family time. This is what Thanksgiving is about!
11/25/2010
Wednesday, November 24, 2010
11/24/2010 Yoga
The boys spent pretty much all day with Uncle Ryan. Jeid light-saber battles raged outside for much of the day, but Uncle Ryan is also quite the yoga yogi, and got the boys to do some yoga with him!
OK, so how cool is that!! This goes way beyond the usual armpit-fart Uncle teaching!! These boys have some seriously awesome cool uncles.
11/24/2010
OK, so how cool is that!! This goes way beyond the usual armpit-fart Uncle teaching!! These boys have some seriously awesome cool uncles.
11/24/2010
11/24/2010 "In advance"
Making things "in advance" -- that's what my idol, Ina Garten, emphasizes. Many years of my poor mother dashing in and out of the family action to go tend to something in the kitchen underscores that.
Lucky me! I took the day off work yesterday to grocery-shop and prepare for Thanksgiving cooking, and I got to hear Ina interviewed on NPR's "Talk of the Nation"! So now I know how I'm going to do the turkey: super-easy and pretty much nothing. Butter, salt, roast, done.
'Cause, you all know how I'm about simplicity when it comes to cooking. Uh-huh. Well, I am basically practical, but that doesn't mean I can't apply my very own brand of insanity to to it. With Laura and Ryan here as willing guinea pigs, I'm going all-out. Turkey, 2 kinds of stuffing, 3 vegetables, mashed potatoes, candied yams, cornbread, an oddball chestnut dish, cranberry sauce (from fresh cranberries of course, mulled wine and 3 desserts. And a roasted butternut-squash-pumpkin soup today just...well, just because I had the squash and needed to use it.
Good thing I watch so much Food Network: do the desserts first, they take the longest. My experience with baking now also tells me that anything that involves fruit preparation (e.g. peeling and slicing apples) is very time-consuming. Pumpkin pies are really easy by comparison.
I made a pumpkin pie, an apple galette and Canadian butter tarts with pecans today for Dave.
Ina highly recommends making things in advance so you can be part of the party. I agree. She also strongly suggests not making too many things -- there's no need to, and unless you're feeding a frat house, guests really appreciate quality, not quantity. This latter I have trouble heeding, and it encroaches upon the former. Which is why at 11:30pm I'm on my way to the kitchen to work on another stuffing!! Ina, save me from myself!
11/24/2010
Lucky me! I took the day off work yesterday to grocery-shop and prepare for Thanksgiving cooking, and I got to hear Ina interviewed on NPR's "Talk of the Nation"! So now I know how I'm going to do the turkey: super-easy and pretty much nothing. Butter, salt, roast, done.
'Cause, you all know how I'm about simplicity when it comes to cooking. Uh-huh. Well, I am basically practical, but that doesn't mean I can't apply my very own brand of insanity to to it. With Laura and Ryan here as willing guinea pigs, I'm going all-out. Turkey, 2 kinds of stuffing, 3 vegetables, mashed potatoes, candied yams, cornbread, an oddball chestnut dish, cranberry sauce (from fresh cranberries of course, mulled wine and 3 desserts. And a roasted butternut-squash-pumpkin soup today just...well, just because I had the squash and needed to use it.
Good thing I watch so much Food Network: do the desserts first, they take the longest. My experience with baking now also tells me that anything that involves fruit preparation (e.g. peeling and slicing apples) is very time-consuming. Pumpkin pies are really easy by comparison.
I made a pumpkin pie, an apple galette and Canadian butter tarts with pecans today for Dave.
Ina highly recommends making things in advance so you can be part of the party. I agree. She also strongly suggests not making too many things -- there's no need to, and unless you're feeding a frat house, guests really appreciate quality, not quantity. This latter I have trouble heeding, and it encroaches upon the former. Which is why at 11:30pm I'm on my way to the kitchen to work on another stuffing!! Ina, save me from myself!
11/24/2010
Tuesday, November 23, 2010
Monday, November 22, 2010
11/22/2010 Car Talk
Last week I was chatting with a friend who's in need of a new car (and you know who you are -- we'll all be overjoyed on your behalf when that happens!).
Well, turns out I might be in need myself. My car is in decent shape, but it's never been the best example of a Subaru, and it's always burned more oil than it should. Now it's burning more, and we've had to do a few extra unusual/extra repairs on it in my ownership, more than a tried-and-true Honda lover like me should ever have to put up with. That'd all be OK if I really liked driving it, but I really never have..
There are things I really like about it, and the main reasons I chose it remain: it has the biggest wagon space for the price, really comfortable seats (heated too!), and great visibility and mirrors. It'd be hard to go to a car with less cargo area, which rules out most small and mid-sized SUVs, which I'm not sure I want anyway. People like SUVs because of the higher viewing perspective, but I'm not crazy about the tipsy high center-of-gravity feeling I get while driving them.
Anyway, seems we're unofficially in the market for another car. Now how do I break it to my checkbook?
11/22/2010
Well, turns out I might be in need myself. My car is in decent shape, but it's never been the best example of a Subaru, and it's always burned more oil than it should. Now it's burning more, and we've had to do a few extra unusual/extra repairs on it in my ownership, more than a tried-and-true Honda lover like me should ever have to put up with. That'd all be OK if I really liked driving it, but I really never have..
There are things I really like about it, and the main reasons I chose it remain: it has the biggest wagon space for the price, really comfortable seats (heated too!), and great visibility and mirrors. It'd be hard to go to a car with less cargo area, which rules out most small and mid-sized SUVs, which I'm not sure I want anyway. People like SUVs because of the higher viewing perspective, but I'm not crazy about the tipsy high center-of-gravity feeling I get while driving them.
Anyway, seems we're unofficially in the market for another car. Now how do I break it to my checkbook?
11/22/2010
Sunday, November 21, 2010
11/21/2010 Trial classes
Saturday I took Julian and Katrina to trial classes, finally!
Katrina's was a dance class, and Julian's was, believe it or not, a Kung Fu class.
I wasn't planning on a Kung Fu trial for Julian that day, but he was being a serious pain at home, so I brought him with me to Katrina's dance class. On the way back home, I noticed a Kung Fu place right near our house, and it was open. We stopped and watched, and saw that there was a beginner class in about 2 hours, and they said we could take a free trial class. So, Kung Fu.
First, Katrina. She had been all excited about "twirling" in her dance class, so she was seriously nonplussed when it started out with tap shoes. I agree, I've never been a fan of tap. (That's Katrina in the purple leotard and her head against the barre. Sigh.)
She pretty much refused to do anything in most of the class.
A few props came out in the end: teddy bears and skirts, enough to elicit a smile or two, but not exactly raging enthusiasm.
She liked the skirt but mostly just stared at herself while the other girls danced and twirled.
One little friend tried to take Katrina under her wing, to little avail.
Not a follower, this one!
I don't think we're going to pursue this. The school is structured with an inflexible "tuition" policy, and I think we need to start more flexibly, and lower-key. I know Katrina wants to dance, but I also know from much experience myself that it takes a few times to find the right place.
So as we were almost home, we cut into the parking lot with the Kung Fu place. I'd seen kids at Trader Joe's with the T-shirts for this place (good advertising!). I was really impressed with what I saw -- it looked so much more interesting and active than Tae Kwon Do. Julian resisted even watching at first, but as soon as he saw there were weapons involved, he was all over it.
So I brought Julian back for a trial lesson at 1pm, and he took right to it. My ears thought they'd gone to heaven when I heard these boys say "YES SIR!!" Yes sir?! I'm sold!
Julian's in the dark green sweatshirt.
I liked the physical exercises, and I liked the no-excuses aggression, and the keeping kids in line (literally, they have to stay in a line). This is no warm-n-fuzzy namby-pamby "we let the kids guide us" sort of thing. No, the kids bow going in and out, and a kid out of line is quickly corrected back, and they all say smartly, "Yes SIR!" Things move fast and there is NO opportunity for messing around. And I like the precise physical positions they students go in -- it really appeals to the dance side in me. Cool!
The class chasse's across the floor. Julian is wearing a green sweatshirt (trial class), but it's his voice you hear right away: "yes SIR!"
A teacher (Sifu) took the rank beginners to the back to practice some moves. Julian loved kicking the big cylinder. It wasn't random kicking, it was part of a sequence.
I signed him up right after the trial class, swallowing the $100/month cost (thats $25/lesson), plus the initiation fee and the uniform.
I brought him back today, Sunday, for his first real class, wearing his black baggy uniform pants and the right kind of sneakers. I just love seeing how attentive he is, how respectful he is of the authority. He is the first and loudest to say "Yes SIR! and obeys immediately. Ahhh, this is what I like to see in a rebel boy!
Today in his first "real" class, he was challenged to jump and twist quickly. In the video, Julian is closest to the camera in the back row and being corrected by the teacher, which sort of works.
This Kung Fu place is hard to beat for convenience. There are 3 beginner classes a week, two on weekends and one Thursdays at 6, but we can attend whichever works for us any week. I bought a once-a-week package for 3 months, which was expensive -- that's a big downside. But I really liked the class, I think it's much more interesting, active and engaging of what we'd seen of Tae Kwon Do. This doesn't happen often in Sunnyvale, but we can walk to it (though it's in Cupertino).
Ironically, there is also a dance place in the same strip mall -- also walkable -- but no weekend classes. Dance classes are more rigid in how they let you take them. The school where Katrina took her trial class today is planning a show, and I was pressured into attending the meeting for the show -- a show, already? The director said something about a Parks & Rec class if we were looking for just exposure; this school is a little more serious. You can see from the videos just how serious Katrina was about it. I know there are better-suited classes out there for her.
I was seriouly impressed at the little girls in the Shaolin Kung Fu classes though -- would this be more my hesitant nonathlete's style? But first, she'd have to learn to say "Yes, SIR!"
11/21/2010
Katrina's was a dance class, and Julian's was, believe it or not, a Kung Fu class.
I wasn't planning on a Kung Fu trial for Julian that day, but he was being a serious pain at home, so I brought him with me to Katrina's dance class. On the way back home, I noticed a Kung Fu place right near our house, and it was open. We stopped and watched, and saw that there was a beginner class in about 2 hours, and they said we could take a free trial class. So, Kung Fu.
First, Katrina. She had been all excited about "twirling" in her dance class, so she was seriously nonplussed when it started out with tap shoes. I agree, I've never been a fan of tap. (That's Katrina in the purple leotard and her head against the barre. Sigh.)
She pretty much refused to do anything in most of the class.
A few props came out in the end: teddy bears and skirts, enough to elicit a smile or two, but not exactly raging enthusiasm.
She liked the skirt but mostly just stared at herself while the other girls danced and twirled.
One little friend tried to take Katrina under her wing, to little avail.
Not a follower, this one!
I don't think we're going to pursue this. The school is structured with an inflexible "tuition" policy, and I think we need to start more flexibly, and lower-key. I know Katrina wants to dance, but I also know from much experience myself that it takes a few times to find the right place.
So as we were almost home, we cut into the parking lot with the Kung Fu place. I'd seen kids at Trader Joe's with the T-shirts for this place (good advertising!). I was really impressed with what I saw -- it looked so much more interesting and active than Tae Kwon Do. Julian resisted even watching at first, but as soon as he saw there were weapons involved, he was all over it.
So I brought Julian back for a trial lesson at 1pm, and he took right to it. My ears thought they'd gone to heaven when I heard these boys say "YES SIR!!" Yes sir?! I'm sold!
Julian's in the dark green sweatshirt.
I liked the physical exercises, and I liked the no-excuses aggression, and the keeping kids in line (literally, they have to stay in a line). This is no warm-n-fuzzy namby-pamby "we let the kids guide us" sort of thing. No, the kids bow going in and out, and a kid out of line is quickly corrected back, and they all say smartly, "Yes SIR!" Things move fast and there is NO opportunity for messing around. And I like the precise physical positions they students go in -- it really appeals to the dance side in me. Cool!
The class chasse's across the floor. Julian is wearing a green sweatshirt (trial class), but it's his voice you hear right away: "yes SIR!"
A teacher (Sifu) took the rank beginners to the back to practice some moves. Julian loved kicking the big cylinder. It wasn't random kicking, it was part of a sequence.
I signed him up right after the trial class, swallowing the $100/month cost (thats $25/lesson), plus the initiation fee and the uniform.
I brought him back today, Sunday, for his first real class, wearing his black baggy uniform pants and the right kind of sneakers. I just love seeing how attentive he is, how respectful he is of the authority. He is the first and loudest to say "Yes SIR! and obeys immediately. Ahhh, this is what I like to see in a rebel boy!
Today in his first "real" class, he was challenged to jump and twist quickly. In the video, Julian is closest to the camera in the back row and being corrected by the teacher, which sort of works.
This Kung Fu place is hard to beat for convenience. There are 3 beginner classes a week, two on weekends and one Thursdays at 6, but we can attend whichever works for us any week. I bought a once-a-week package for 3 months, which was expensive -- that's a big downside. But I really liked the class, I think it's much more interesting, active and engaging of what we'd seen of Tae Kwon Do. This doesn't happen often in Sunnyvale, but we can walk to it (though it's in Cupertino).
Ironically, there is also a dance place in the same strip mall -- also walkable -- but no weekend classes. Dance classes are more rigid in how they let you take them. The school where Katrina took her trial class today is planning a show, and I was pressured into attending the meeting for the show -- a show, already? The director said something about a Parks & Rec class if we were looking for just exposure; this school is a little more serious. You can see from the videos just how serious Katrina was about it. I know there are better-suited classes out there for her.
I was seriouly impressed at the little girls in the Shaolin Kung Fu classes though -- would this be more my hesitant nonathlete's style? But first, she'd have to learn to say "Yes, SIR!"
11/21/2010
Saturday, November 20, 2010
11/20/2010 Passport to rebellion
I was determined to get the boys' projects that are due right after Thanksgiving done this weekend, so that we don't have to ruin the holiday.
This is proving to be very difficult. I'm really furious that they both have projects due right after a week off of school -- that means Julian's 4-week project and Gabriel's 3-week project include a week of vacation time, and right before they're due. Families travel, have visitors, relax, have time off during Thanksgiving. We're not talking about a paper due for a college student; this is time-consuming, labor-intensive work for the parents.
I think this time we need to rebel against Gabriel's "passport" project, partly on principle and partly because it's just too much work and not enough time. It was given Nov. 10th and is due Nov. 30th -- a span that includes only 6 school days -- and it was given concurrently with the main project, the "country study" report.
The "passport" project includes a booklet of questions in which you're supposed to draw a flag of the country of origin (that's a 1-night project right there) and trace your ancestors' path on a map and make a clothespin doll with the traditional clothing from the country of origin and bring in a dish from the country for a multicultural feast (separate from the "country study" recipe).
And answer these questions.
This is in addition to the Country Study report, which is the main report!! And regular homework, at least when there's school.
Really, this is too much. Or is it? Do other 3rd-grade parents think this is excessive? What about the assumption that you have relatives to ask these questions of? Or the assumption that this is what you, the kid and the relatives want to be doing over the holiday?
I don't know, I'm starting to think the only thing that Gabriel should turn in is a note from his parents saying this is too difficult for Americans who have assimilated, and is too much work in too little time. But I don't have the gumption to rebel against teachers and stick Gabriel in the middle of it.
11/20/2010
This is proving to be very difficult. I'm really furious that they both have projects due right after a week off of school -- that means Julian's 4-week project and Gabriel's 3-week project include a week of vacation time, and right before they're due. Families travel, have visitors, relax, have time off during Thanksgiving. We're not talking about a paper due for a college student; this is time-consuming, labor-intensive work for the parents.
I think this time we need to rebel against Gabriel's "passport" project, partly on principle and partly because it's just too much work and not enough time. It was given Nov. 10th and is due Nov. 30th -- a span that includes only 6 school days -- and it was given concurrently with the main project, the "country study" report.
The "passport" project includes a booklet of questions in which you're supposed to draw a flag of the country of origin (that's a 1-night project right there) and trace your ancestors' path on a map and make a clothespin doll with the traditional clothing from the country of origin and bring in a dish from the country for a multicultural feast (separate from the "country study" recipe).
And answer these questions.
Family History
When did your family or ancestors come to the United States? (What year?)
Where did they live before?
How did they travel to the U.S.?
How long did it take them to get here?
Describe the route they took, who came with them, and their traveling experiences.
Tell what happened when they first got to the U.S.
What was hard for them to get used to?
What was easy for them to get used to?
What do you think they miss the most from their old home?
Tell what special traditions and customs they brought with them.
Did they bring any special mementos or favorite things?
Did they bring knowledge of any special skills or languages?
Description of the place they left.
Place name:
Latitude:
Longitude:
The physical setting (mountain or valley, hot or cold, rainy or dry, etc).
Tell something about what it might have been like to live there.
Make a drawing of the flag of the place your family came from
Name of country:
Additional information?
Color the map to show the place your family left, and the route they took to the United States.
Come to class ready to show something about your family's immigration to the United States! We encourage students to take advantage of the Thanksgiving holiday to find out the answers to those questions by asking the family members would would know! Parents should provide guidance in filling out the passport.
This is in addition to the Country Study report, which is the main report!! And regular homework, at least when there's school.
Really, this is too much. Or is it? Do other 3rd-grade parents think this is excessive? What about the assumption that you have relatives to ask these questions of? Or the assumption that this is what you, the kid and the relatives want to be doing over the holiday?
I don't know, I'm starting to think the only thing that Gabriel should turn in is a note from his parents saying this is too difficult for Americans who have assimilated, and is too much work in too little time. But I don't have the gumption to rebel against teachers and stick Gabriel in the middle of it.
11/20/2010
Thursday, November 18, 2010
11/18/2010 The Prince
Julian had his first trip to "The Prince"'s office yesterday. You know, that Prince that is your Pal? This is why, from his teacher:
Julian is also a budding liar. He claimed he didn't know it was a bad word, but it was completely obvious to me and Dave and his teacher that he knew. And baseball field?? Baloney.
Funny, Gabriel doesn't lie about stuff like that -- he stands up and says things like "it's my life and I can do what I want with it" -- resistant, but tackles it head-on. Julian, on the other hand, tries to worm out of it with a fib. He's not very good at it.
It's just one thing after another with these boys!
11/18/2010
Today Julian was teaching some of the students the F*** word. I asked him
where he learned this word from and he told me from the baseball field. I
informed him that this word is inappropriate to use and he should not be
using it. I also told him if he doesn't know what a word means he should
ask an adult before using it or teaching it to others.
Julian is also a budding liar. He claimed he didn't know it was a bad word, but it was completely obvious to me and Dave and his teacher that he knew. And baseball field?? Baloney.
Funny, Gabriel doesn't lie about stuff like that -- he stands up and says things like "it's my life and I can do what I want with it" -- resistant, but tackles it head-on. Julian, on the other hand, tries to worm out of it with a fib. He's not very good at it.
It's just one thing after another with these boys!
11/18/2010
Wednesday, November 17, 2010
11/17/2010 Projects
These school projects are ruining our lives. Really!
I get home from work and before doing anything else, go straight to the office to get Julian started. Tonight I also had to do something for Gabriel (find and print a black-and-white Canadian flag so he can color it). I spend at least an hour trying to herd the boys with this work, running back and forth between the rooms where they're set up and the kitchen, while attempting to make dinner and take care of everything else. If Dave gets home in time, he helps too, but much of the trouble is in keeping Katrina from distracting them.
As a result, we've had dinner far far too late every night, after 7:00. This pushes bedtime far too late -- as I type, Katrina is crying her eyes out about not wanting a bath, way overtired, and it's that much more difficult to keep the boys on track. My main thoughts about Thanksgiving have been how on earth we're going to finish Julian's project by Nov. 29th, the Monday after the break. I spend dinnertime either in the office trying to keep up with school things (contribution for teacher gift, paying for Katrina's preschool gymnastics, ordering shoes, whatever) or rushing around the kitchen cleaning lunchbags and making lunch for the next day. Actually sitting and talking to everyone is out of the question, and besides, I need a break by then.
It's clear from the project instructions that they think this will promote family time together. It has the exact opposite effect. Time in the evenings with my children is little more than a stressful nagfest. There are good moments, but there is little opportunity for relaxed enjoyable time together, like listening to Gabriel's latest blues composition on the piano.
Gabriel actually has two reports due in early December. One is a "country studies" report (on Canada) and one is a "passport to the 3rd grade" project, in which he has to answer pages of questions about his ancestors, where they arrived in the U.S, where they came from, etc. This is not something he can do himself, he needs a great deal of time and interaction. In fact, the intent is to work on it over Thanksgiving, when presumably we'll be with family members to ask all the questions!! GREAT IDEA! Let's spend Thanksgiving with family doing schoolwork!
On top of it, I just discovered that while I escaped a craft project for the "country studies" report, the "passport" report includes a freakin' clothespin doll. I HATE THOSE!! Oh yeah, AND, a multicultural feast, in which we're supposed to bring a dish from the "passport" country. That's two cooking projects.
"Gabriel's in 3rd grade, isn't he supposed to do these things himself?" Dave asked. Not a clothespin doll. Not a recipe from Canada. Not a dish from France. Not pages of questions that can't be answered by looking things up yourself. Not going to the library to get books on Canada. Not planning your time, reading through the pages of instructions, and breaking it down into projects that can be done in an evening.
Julian's report is turning into a nightmare too. He's cooperative and wants to do it, but he resists direction on how to do it. For instance, I'm suggesting that he write his sentences on a separate paper than the one he does the drawings on, then cut out the drawings and glue them to the paper with the sentences. That way, if he makes mistakes in the sentences, he doesn't spend half an hour erasing everything. Kids erase FAR FAR too much, it looks awful, takes forever, and leaves eraser scraps all over the place and it's SUCH a pain! But he can't be convinced to do his sentences and drawings separately. I get impatient and have to leave it -- after all, I have dinner on the stove and can't spend a lot of time persuading him in how to put this together. It is his project, but if he makes a mistake he will want to do the drawings all over again, and we already ruined one evening just getting those done. So far he's almost done 3 out of the 6 pages he has to do, and it's taken about 6 very painful nights to get even just that done.
It's quite clear the school is geared toward families with 1 or 2 children, two parents, one who stays at home, and parents from cultures who don't mind extra work.
I guess I have to expect to ruin this weekend in order to save Thanksgiving. This SUCKS.
11/17/2010
I get home from work and before doing anything else, go straight to the office to get Julian started. Tonight I also had to do something for Gabriel (find and print a black-and-white Canadian flag so he can color it). I spend at least an hour trying to herd the boys with this work, running back and forth between the rooms where they're set up and the kitchen, while attempting to make dinner and take care of everything else. If Dave gets home in time, he helps too, but much of the trouble is in keeping Katrina from distracting them.
As a result, we've had dinner far far too late every night, after 7:00. This pushes bedtime far too late -- as I type, Katrina is crying her eyes out about not wanting a bath, way overtired, and it's that much more difficult to keep the boys on track. My main thoughts about Thanksgiving have been how on earth we're going to finish Julian's project by Nov. 29th, the Monday after the break. I spend dinnertime either in the office trying to keep up with school things (contribution for teacher gift, paying for Katrina's preschool gymnastics, ordering shoes, whatever) or rushing around the kitchen cleaning lunchbags and making lunch for the next day. Actually sitting and talking to everyone is out of the question, and besides, I need a break by then.
It's clear from the project instructions that they think this will promote family time together. It has the exact opposite effect. Time in the evenings with my children is little more than a stressful nagfest. There are good moments, but there is little opportunity for relaxed enjoyable time together, like listening to Gabriel's latest blues composition on the piano.
Gabriel actually has two reports due in early December. One is a "country studies" report (on Canada) and one is a "passport to the 3rd grade" project, in which he has to answer pages of questions about his ancestors, where they arrived in the U.S, where they came from, etc. This is not something he can do himself, he needs a great deal of time and interaction. In fact, the intent is to work on it over Thanksgiving, when presumably we'll be with family members to ask all the questions!! GREAT IDEA! Let's spend Thanksgiving with family doing schoolwork!
On top of it, I just discovered that while I escaped a craft project for the "country studies" report, the "passport" report includes a freakin' clothespin doll. I HATE THOSE!! Oh yeah, AND, a multicultural feast, in which we're supposed to bring a dish from the "passport" country. That's two cooking projects.
"Gabriel's in 3rd grade, isn't he supposed to do these things himself?" Dave asked. Not a clothespin doll. Not a recipe from Canada. Not a dish from France. Not pages of questions that can't be answered by looking things up yourself. Not going to the library to get books on Canada. Not planning your time, reading through the pages of instructions, and breaking it down into projects that can be done in an evening.
Julian's report is turning into a nightmare too. He's cooperative and wants to do it, but he resists direction on how to do it. For instance, I'm suggesting that he write his sentences on a separate paper than the one he does the drawings on, then cut out the drawings and glue them to the paper with the sentences. That way, if he makes mistakes in the sentences, he doesn't spend half an hour erasing everything. Kids erase FAR FAR too much, it looks awful, takes forever, and leaves eraser scraps all over the place and it's SUCH a pain! But he can't be convinced to do his sentences and drawings separately. I get impatient and have to leave it -- after all, I have dinner on the stove and can't spend a lot of time persuading him in how to put this together. It is his project, but if he makes a mistake he will want to do the drawings all over again, and we already ruined one evening just getting those done. So far he's almost done 3 out of the 6 pages he has to do, and it's taken about 6 very painful nights to get even just that done.
It's quite clear the school is geared toward families with 1 or 2 children, two parents, one who stays at home, and parents from cultures who don't mind extra work.
I guess I have to expect to ruin this weekend in order to save Thanksgiving. This SUCKS.
11/17/2010
Tuesday, November 16, 2010
11/16/2010 Writing
I heard a panel discussion on KQED tonight (local NPR affiliate) in which a children's book author was asked, by a girl about 10 years old, when he knew he wanted to be a writer. He said he'd always known, he'd always wanted to be a writer.
What do you mean, want to be a writer? What writer wants to be a writer? What does want have to do with it?
I've always assumed I'd be a writer too, pretty much since I could write. But I was surprised to hear him say he wanted to be a writer. We born writers are stuck with it, it's not something we want to do or don't want to do, any more than we want to breathe or not breathe. It's integral to who we are, we're driven crazy by it and driven even crazier not to do it. It's not a matter of choice.
Other things are.
Today I told my immediate boss at work that I wasn't going to apply to move to a different group after all, which means I (and he) will continue to work under the umbrella of a truly awful Director. Why wouldn't try to move groups if I could? The move would mean brushing up on technology that's more marketable, more widespread (IP, layer 3 for you networkers), which would increase opportunities to work from home, flexibly, contract, part-time -- and working for a very reasonable and well-regarded manager. It would mean that my immediate boss, a great guy who I really like, will not be constantly running interference between me (who will not keep quiet) and our mutual Director (who will never see outspokenness as an asset).
But moving groups would also mean leaving a group I really like, and more importantly, a technology (Carrier Ethernet and MPLS for you networkers) that I really really want to learn about. And I have enough experience in my career (meaning, mistakes) to know better than to go against what I "want" or am driven to do at the moment -- practical or not.
Someday I would like to leave network engineering behind and move to writing. Of what sort, I don't know exactly (though I have lots of book and article ideas), but the answer has not yet presented itself in sufficient force to cause that to happen. Right now my "passion" for network engineering exceeds my drive to write. I can't say "passion" to write because that again would imply some sort of choice. Passion fades, shifts, goes in waves. Writing is a nonstop thorn in my side, always tormenting me, always relieving me, always there whether I want it to be or not.
Here's what this blog post tonight should have been:
Today when I picked up the boys from the CDC, Julian was engrossed in an unusually thick book for him. He could only be persuaded to get up and get his knapsack if he could bring the book home with him, he liked it so much. I was floored when I saw that he was reading poetry! Kids' poetry, the excellent popular Shel Silverstein book "Where the sidewalk ends." What a nice thing to find him doing. I think we need to get that book.
I wonder when Shel Silverstein knew he wanted to be a writer.
11/16/2010
What do you mean, want to be a writer? What writer wants to be a writer? What does want have to do with it?
I've always assumed I'd be a writer too, pretty much since I could write. But I was surprised to hear him say he wanted to be a writer. We born writers are stuck with it, it's not something we want to do or don't want to do, any more than we want to breathe or not breathe. It's integral to who we are, we're driven crazy by it and driven even crazier not to do it. It's not a matter of choice.
Other things are.
Today I told my immediate boss at work that I wasn't going to apply to move to a different group after all, which means I (and he) will continue to work under the umbrella of a truly awful Director. Why wouldn't try to move groups if I could? The move would mean brushing up on technology that's more marketable, more widespread (IP, layer 3 for you networkers), which would increase opportunities to work from home, flexibly, contract, part-time -- and working for a very reasonable and well-regarded manager. It would mean that my immediate boss, a great guy who I really like, will not be constantly running interference between me (who will not keep quiet) and our mutual Director (who will never see outspokenness as an asset).
But moving groups would also mean leaving a group I really like, and more importantly, a technology (Carrier Ethernet and MPLS for you networkers) that I really really want to learn about. And I have enough experience in my career (meaning, mistakes) to know better than to go against what I "want" or am driven to do at the moment -- practical or not.
Someday I would like to leave network engineering behind and move to writing. Of what sort, I don't know exactly (though I have lots of book and article ideas), but the answer has not yet presented itself in sufficient force to cause that to happen. Right now my "passion" for network engineering exceeds my drive to write. I can't say "passion" to write because that again would imply some sort of choice. Passion fades, shifts, goes in waves. Writing is a nonstop thorn in my side, always tormenting me, always relieving me, always there whether I want it to be or not.
Here's what this blog post tonight should have been:
Today when I picked up the boys from the CDC, Julian was engrossed in an unusually thick book for him. He could only be persuaded to get up and get his knapsack if he could bring the book home with him, he liked it so much. I was floored when I saw that he was reading poetry! Kids' poetry, the excellent popular Shel Silverstein book "Where the sidewalk ends." What a nice thing to find him doing. I think we need to get that book.
I wonder when Shel Silverstein knew he wanted to be a writer.
11/16/2010
Monday, November 15, 2010
11/15/2010 A friend's passing
Turns out, I don't do so well with death. I've never lost anyone truly close to me, but the few memorial services I've been to were extremely difficult, and these for people I didn't know well but really liked.
Sunday, a very longtime friend died at home, of some sort of respiratory illness. He ran one of the best BMW motorcycle dealerships in the country, and was a true champion of adventure riding. Kari was one of my first advocates when I started riding BMWs, helped me through one bike purchase and rebuild after another, led numerous group rides and adventures I was on, and was a frequent presence in a very big part of my life for 10 years. He was daring and confident and very kidlike in his joy and glee for the sport.
One of the moments I remember best of Kari wasn't about riding, however. It was when his wife had breast cancer, and he was so worried about losing her. One day I was at his dealership buying yet another part (we old boxer owners did that on a very regular basis) and he talked to me about what was going on with his wife's illness -- and broke down in tears. I hugged and comforted as best I could -- we were standing and he was quite a bit taller -- but he was as sincere in his grief and fear as he always was in his cowboylike fervor for riding. Dave and I ran into Kari at a motorcycle show once when I was pregnant with Julian, and he happily gushed about his oldest daughter getting engaged. Though he was a very very well-known rider and advocate for adventure riding, he was first and foremost a family man. (Thankfully his wife survived.)
I saw Kari at his dealership for the last time a few months ago. He'd slowed down a little, mostly because of some persistent respiratory illness, but was still his usual warm and friendly and enthusiastic self. It seems that same illness finally claimed him yesterday. He was only 62.
I know few people who more embody life and energy than him, and it's incredible he survived the countless daring adventures and crazy risks he leaped into happily. He was a really really fast and brave rider, taking on challenges that most would never dare, joking about his advancing age.
It almost seems unfair that he died for a relatively useless and not-fun reason; I can just imagine him saying he'd much rather die doing while something he really loved than be taken by a stupid cough. Then again, he was with his beloved wife and daughters, and that to him probably would be the best place to be.
A huge part of me and my past life is gone with him too. Though I wasn't running into him weekly as I was for many years, he was instrumental in a very major part of my life.
I'm not sure I can handle this memorial.
11/15/2010
Sunday, a very longtime friend died at home, of some sort of respiratory illness. He ran one of the best BMW motorcycle dealerships in the country, and was a true champion of adventure riding. Kari was one of my first advocates when I started riding BMWs, helped me through one bike purchase and rebuild after another, led numerous group rides and adventures I was on, and was a frequent presence in a very big part of my life for 10 years. He was daring and confident and very kidlike in his joy and glee for the sport.
One of the moments I remember best of Kari wasn't about riding, however. It was when his wife had breast cancer, and he was so worried about losing her. One day I was at his dealership buying yet another part (we old boxer owners did that on a very regular basis) and he talked to me about what was going on with his wife's illness -- and broke down in tears. I hugged and comforted as best I could -- we were standing and he was quite a bit taller -- but he was as sincere in his grief and fear as he always was in his cowboylike fervor for riding. Dave and I ran into Kari at a motorcycle show once when I was pregnant with Julian, and he happily gushed about his oldest daughter getting engaged. Though he was a very very well-known rider and advocate for adventure riding, he was first and foremost a family man. (Thankfully his wife survived.)
I saw Kari at his dealership for the last time a few months ago. He'd slowed down a little, mostly because of some persistent respiratory illness, but was still his usual warm and friendly and enthusiastic self. It seems that same illness finally claimed him yesterday. He was only 62.
I know few people who more embody life and energy than him, and it's incredible he survived the countless daring adventures and crazy risks he leaped into happily. He was a really really fast and brave rider, taking on challenges that most would never dare, joking about his advancing age.
It almost seems unfair that he died for a relatively useless and not-fun reason; I can just imagine him saying he'd much rather die doing while something he really loved than be taken by a stupid cough. Then again, he was with his beloved wife and daughters, and that to him probably would be the best place to be.
A huge part of me and my past life is gone with him too. Though I wasn't running into him weekly as I was for many years, he was instrumental in a very major part of my life.
I'm not sure I can handle this memorial.
11/15/2010
Sunday, November 14, 2010
11/14/2010 Return to the BMX Park
Dave's always been the one to take the boys to the BMX park, since it is a vehicle-related thing after all. But now the boys are pretty comfortable there, and there's not a whole lot for a parent to do other than stand around and watch. Dave will ride his own bike a little, but he's not into the wall hills or death-defying drops into pits that attract the teen crowd. Nor is his mountain bike well-suited to it.
But I've always liked going. I put on running shoes, and follow the boys trotting along, taking pictures, watching the other kids.
One thing for sure: this place is a boys' bastion. Occasionally, as today, there's a girl there being encouraged by Dad, but she's usually pretty timid or held back by having worn her sparkly silver princess slippers (as happened today). If there is a boys' place, this is it.
I read about these little training bikes, ones with no pedals or brakes, for a shocking price of $150. There were three of them there today, and the little kids did pretty well!
Julian mostly stayed in the first zone. He's confident there, but despite his more natural balance than Gabriel, Gabriel's courage takes him to all the zones and now, all the bumps, in the park. Of course, there's plenty of fun to be had in the first zone anyway.
Then I chased around getting photos of Gabriel, which he just loves. He'll call from way the heck across the course, "READY MOM!! HERE I COO-OOME!!!" and then show off his best run. Aww, I love that. My boy showing off for me.
I really look forward to when they're big enough to get mountain bikes with gears -- the possibilities that will open up to us will be huge!!! I haven't ridden a bicycle in years (and my spin class yesterday morning doesn't count), but it's something the whole family will love. We do live in California after all, the birthplace of mountain biking. I can't wait.
Meantime, it's awfully fun chasing after my sons on these nice confined hills.
11/14/2010
But I've always liked going. I put on running shoes, and follow the boys trotting along, taking pictures, watching the other kids.
One thing for sure: this place is a boys' bastion. Occasionally, as today, there's a girl there being encouraged by Dad, but she's usually pretty timid or held back by having worn her sparkly silver princess slippers (as happened today). If there is a boys' place, this is it.
I read about these little training bikes, ones with no pedals or brakes, for a shocking price of $150. There were three of them there today, and the little kids did pretty well!
Julian mostly stayed in the first zone. He's confident there, but despite his more natural balance than Gabriel, Gabriel's courage takes him to all the zones and now, all the bumps, in the park. Of course, there's plenty of fun to be had in the first zone anyway.
Then I chased around getting photos of Gabriel, which he just loves. He'll call from way the heck across the course, "READY MOM!! HERE I COO-OOME!!!" and then show off his best run. Aww, I love that. My boy showing off for me.
I really look forward to when they're big enough to get mountain bikes with gears -- the possibilities that will open up to us will be huge!!! I haven't ridden a bicycle in years (and my spin class yesterday morning doesn't count), but it's something the whole family will love. We do live in California after all, the birthplace of mountain biking. I can't wait.
Meantime, it's awfully fun chasing after my sons on these nice confined hills.
11/14/2010
Friday, November 12, 2010
11/12/2010 Countries
These "country" projects the boys have really got me thinking. At the same time that I think they impose too much work on parents, I wish I could do the projects to the fullest with them. And there will be more to come, especially when Katrina gets to school, and I must think now about shaping my life and career (or not) toward that. I only get 10 more years of Gabriel (the last 6 of which he won't want anything to do with me), so now is the time to do these things with them. I'm not going to quit work tomorrow, but especially considering the extraordinary situation at work, I've got to start opening my mind to serious, and perhaps not-so-serious, changes.
I just realized that our two next-door neighbors are from each of the boys' countries of study (China and Canada).
My sister and her family are moving tomorrow -- I'm thinking about you all! Hope it goes well. It's hard, but you WILL survive an exhausting day!
11/12/2010
I just realized that our two next-door neighbors are from each of the boys' countries of study (China and Canada).
My sister and her family are moving tomorrow -- I'm thinking about you all! Hope it goes well. It's hard, but you WILL survive an exhausting day!
11/12/2010
Thursday, November 11, 2010
11/11/2010 Late morning
I had a doctor's appointment this morning, which meant that after dropping kids off this morning, I went back home and took a nap before the 9:45 appointment.
What a difference in my day! My mind was free and open, my old energy restored. I was concentrated and productive at work instead of dragging through every moment. I went running at lunch and joyfully powered through it. And all it took is that half hour I'm always so desperate for.
Ironically, I've also just reasoned that one small improvement in our day-to-day lives would be if I could shift my schedule even earlier. If I could get to work at 7am and leave at 4pm, extra time at home after school with the kids would be so good for them, and me. I don't spend any good time with them in the morning anyway; morning time would be better spent at work in favor of afternoon time.
Except for the part about getting up at 6:30 to be at work at 7, it's a brilliant plan.
Turns out Gabriel already signed up for a country for his "Country Studies" report -- and not one known for its cuisine: Canada?!
Gotta go -- new episode of Burn Notice tonight!
11/11/10
What a difference in my day! My mind was free and open, my old energy restored. I was concentrated and productive at work instead of dragging through every moment. I went running at lunch and joyfully powered through it. And all it took is that half hour I'm always so desperate for.
Ironically, I've also just reasoned that one small improvement in our day-to-day lives would be if I could shift my schedule even earlier. If I could get to work at 7am and leave at 4pm, extra time at home after school with the kids would be so good for them, and me. I don't spend any good time with them in the morning anyway; morning time would be better spent at work in favor of afternoon time.
Except for the part about getting up at 6:30 to be at work at 7, it's a brilliant plan.
Turns out Gabriel already signed up for a country for his "Country Studies" report -- and not one known for its cuisine: Canada?!
Gotta go -- new episode of Burn Notice tonight!
11/11/10
Wednesday, November 10, 2010
11/10/2010 Country Studies
Once again, got home and got right to work on Julian's report on China. I can't believe how much work this is, and this with a really cooperative kid (if slow).
So I was dismayed to see that Gabriel has another book report due now too. Two, sort of. One is a "3rd grade passport," a book he has to fill out with information about his family origins. The other is a "Country Study Book Report," in which he had to write a fair amount about the country of his choice.
In addition to the regular report writing on his country, part of the project is to do one of the following: Make a clothespin doll, make a shoebox diorama, write a summary of a traditional story, learn a cultural song and perform it, or find a recipe to make. This would be an additional nightmare, except that the checked selection is the recipe option! I can't tell if Gabriel chose it or if his teacher did. Thank goodness -- I'd much rather make a recipe together than decorate a clothespin doll! Now I just need to steer him toward a country with a cuisine I have a prayer of making.
Today I'm just bedraggled instead of drop-dead steamroller exhausted. But between how tired I've been and how much work the boys' projects have been (and will be), the smidgling energy I put into hockey classes and T-ball is a far-away distant wondrous memory.
11/10/2010
So I was dismayed to see that Gabriel has another book report due now too. Two, sort of. One is a "3rd grade passport," a book he has to fill out with information about his family origins. The other is a "Country Study Book Report," in which he had to write a fair amount about the country of his choice.
In addition to the regular report writing on his country, part of the project is to do one of the following: Make a clothespin doll, make a shoebox diorama, write a summary of a traditional story, learn a cultural song and perform it, or find a recipe to make. This would be an additional nightmare, except that the checked selection is the recipe option! I can't tell if Gabriel chose it or if his teacher did. Thank goodness -- I'd much rather make a recipe together than decorate a clothespin doll! Now I just need to steer him toward a country with a cuisine I have a prayer of making.
Today I'm just bedraggled instead of drop-dead steamroller exhausted. But between how tired I've been and how much work the boys' projects have been (and will be), the smidgling energy I put into hockey classes and T-ball is a far-away distant wondrous memory.
11/10/2010
Tuesday, November 09, 2010
11/9/2010 Draggin' ragged
I don't know what's with me -- I am so unbearably exhausted all day and all night long, every weekday. I make it through work, sort of, then when I get home, there is nothing I want to do more than lie down and sleep for hours. It's like every blink of my eyes is a mini-nap.
But of course, when I get home, I'm ON, and the work really starts. I'd thought about going out with Mom friends tonight, but was so so tired again all day that I hadn't yet mustered up the mental energy for it, then it turned out Dave was going out for dinner anyway. So when I got home with all 3 kids, without even changing my clothes or doing anything else, I launched right into homework and project mode.
Julian has a big project due at the end of the month: a "book" about a country and culture. Ironically, he picked China. So tonight we worked on one of the minimum 6 pages he has to do, this one about animals in China.
I actually really like working on this sort of thing with him, he's very focused and knows exactly what he wants to do (mostly), and I don't have to push him. But logistically and organizationally, a 6-year-old can't pick a few animals from China, come up with a simple sentence about each one, or print or draw the animal himself, he needs guidance. This is a lot of time and work for the parents, especially working parents with 2 other children.
I go back and forth between feeling resentful at my life for making otherwise fun time with my child an exhausting burden, and resentful at the school for placing this level of work on us. Walking in the door already so strung out and tired, my patience is short, my creativity stunted, and my ability to enjoy my bright little boy's energy is limited.
Not to mention having to evict his chatty little sister from the room so we can work together. And not to mention getting dinner started, which tonight didn't happen until after 6:30 because of working on one small part of Julian's project.
But though I was frustrated with having to (and wanting to) work on Julian's project, and missing out on coffee with my Mom friends, and feeling completely depleted, a funny thing happened at dinner. Katrina was unusually calm, and I actually got to talk with the boys, and even with her to some extent. We had a rare nice dinner all talking together, without anyone make gross noises, or booming goofy sounds together that are very cute by themselves, but shut down all other conversation, or making rude obnoxious demands, or even fighting.
One thing I absolutely LOVE about our amazing camping and ski trips this year is that we've spent more time talking about reminiscing about them than we did actually on them! This is always a popular topic.
Is this how "regular" families usually work? Is this what people strive for with the "family dinner" ? Enjoyable, together time, exchanging, laughing, remembering, joking, anticipating future experiences together? For us, the family dinner is usually little more than an exercise in auditory overload and grit-your-teeth endurance.
Now the kids are in bed, and I have a few moments of peace before I kick into cleanup/lunch-making gear. Then I'd like nothing more than to collapse and sleep for the next 14 hours.
11/9/2010
But of course, when I get home, I'm ON, and the work really starts. I'd thought about going out with Mom friends tonight, but was so so tired again all day that I hadn't yet mustered up the mental energy for it, then it turned out Dave was going out for dinner anyway. So when I got home with all 3 kids, without even changing my clothes or doing anything else, I launched right into homework and project mode.
Julian has a big project due at the end of the month: a "book" about a country and culture. Ironically, he picked China. So tonight we worked on one of the minimum 6 pages he has to do, this one about animals in China.
I actually really like working on this sort of thing with him, he's very focused and knows exactly what he wants to do (mostly), and I don't have to push him. But logistically and organizationally, a 6-year-old can't pick a few animals from China, come up with a simple sentence about each one, or print or draw the animal himself, he needs guidance. This is a lot of time and work for the parents, especially working parents with 2 other children.
I go back and forth between feeling resentful at my life for making otherwise fun time with my child an exhausting burden, and resentful at the school for placing this level of work on us. Walking in the door already so strung out and tired, my patience is short, my creativity stunted, and my ability to enjoy my bright little boy's energy is limited.
Not to mention having to evict his chatty little sister from the room so we can work together. And not to mention getting dinner started, which tonight didn't happen until after 6:30 because of working on one small part of Julian's project.
But though I was frustrated with having to (and wanting to) work on Julian's project, and missing out on coffee with my Mom friends, and feeling completely depleted, a funny thing happened at dinner. Katrina was unusually calm, and I actually got to talk with the boys, and even with her to some extent. We had a rare nice dinner all talking together, without anyone make gross noises, or booming goofy sounds together that are very cute by themselves, but shut down all other conversation, or making rude obnoxious demands, or even fighting.
One thing I absolutely LOVE about our amazing camping and ski trips this year is that we've spent more time talking about reminiscing about them than we did actually on them! This is always a popular topic.
Is this how "regular" families usually work? Is this what people strive for with the "family dinner" ? Enjoyable, together time, exchanging, laughing, remembering, joking, anticipating future experiences together? For us, the family dinner is usually little more than an exercise in auditory overload and grit-your-teeth endurance.
Now the kids are in bed, and I have a few moments of peace before I kick into cleanup/lunch-making gear. Then I'd like nothing more than to collapse and sleep for the next 14 hours.
11/9/2010
Monday, November 08, 2010
11/8/2010 Shoe repair
Can't believe it -- no spare shoes for the boys. Don't I know by now not to get caught with my pants down ? (or so to speak). Julian's shoe is intact, sort of, but the velcro has failed so badly it won't stay latched closed and keeps falling off. So instead of blogging about how drop-dead exhausted I am again today, I'm sewing velcro onto a shoe.
11/8/2010
11/8/2010
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