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Today I actually made it to see Gabriel in gymnastics class. I got a report from Gavin's dad (thanks, Scott!) that Gabriel is indeed pretty good at it, and has a great time too.
Perhaps too good a time, as happened in his last class. Once he gets too familiar with it, he stops paying attention and starts becoming a problem. Gymnastics is just about over, and I'd like to keep up some activity for him on Saturday mornings. I'm not sure what though, and he's very unreliable when I ask, and the next level of Tiny Tots gymnastics is in the inconvenient afternoon. Hmm.
We had fun in the playgrounds outside afterward. Katrina tried out a swing for the first time (she was so-so on it), and practiced sitting up with Dad's help.
I had fun running and playing keep-away with the boys, which it turns out, I can do. Their reflexes are fast and they can turn on a dime, but it's still pretty easy to fake them out and outrun them at a trot. But I can see clearly to the day when Gabriel will be able to outrun me.
Julian doesn't like the game for long and starts to cry. I guess that can be expected of a 3-year-old when his mommy runs away from him!
He's a lot better at climbing than he used to be, though frankly he doesn't strike me as a natural athlete.
I finally completed a simple home-improvement task: putting up "pajama pegs" for the kids. Yay, finally, I'm decorating!
Katrina's is a green flower, and the boys' are blue and red stars ($10 each from Land of Nod, with a high cute-to-cost factor!). The idea is that they can hang their pajamas on the pegs for the next night, as PJs around here get worn a few nights in a row.
This afternoon, our plain stairwell got quite the colored light show from our stained-glass window. I'm wishing again we'd asked for more color in the window; I was definitely too conservative. Still, I love it, and it's so fun seeing something different every time I go up the stairs.
Today during Julian's nap and Katrina's non-nap (a far-too-awake baby today), Katrina hung out while Gabriel worked on a birthday card for Gavin's party tomorrow. At first, I was going to just have him sign it, but then thought I'd see how far he'd get writing the rest of it. I was really surprised, he tackled this project with enthusiasm, if slow meticulousness. Of course, his favorite part was coloring in the "5" that I freehanded. For Gabriel, the number is always the reward.
Meantime, Katrina hung out on the floor and took in the activity. She isn't scared of the scary-chicken toy, and actually really likes it. I notice that she really likes the crinkly parts of "multimedia" toys (like the wings on the scary chicken), which the boys never really noticed much.
Here's Katrina making cute sounds while almost cuddling with the chicken toy. (I wish I had a way to edit AVI files; only the first few seconds of this is worth much.)
An occasional party favor item is "Bloonies," a new name for a toy that I recall being a childhood staple. I opened one today for Gabriel, mostly to distract him from kissing Katrina to the point of suffocation (on the whole, a good sibling problem to have).
The Bloonie is a tube of gooey, smelly, toxic and flammable stuff that you squish onto the end of a straw in a ball shape, then blow up into a fragile, sticky balloon that you can't play with. And talk about a baby smothering hazard! I must be forgetting something; I remember this stuff being fun. Then again, as Dave pointed out, in the classic 1902 book Peter Rabbit, Peter's father is caught and ends up in a pie. That never bothered me as a kid, either.
Speaking of kid books, Dave just reported that Gabriel read the entire book Dr. Seuss' "One Fish Two Fish Red Fish Blue Fish," with only a little bit of help from Dave. He's memorized much of it, but these days he points out so many words I know he's never seen in a book that I do believe he's actually reading. And he really, really wants to read, often sitting with a book and studying it with furrowed brows. It reminds me of the intense unrelenting struggles in his toddler times, and now I see him unleash that same remarkable determination and focus on more positive pursuits. It's fascinating seeing that power now put to good use in a five-year-old.
3/3/07
Katrina's first morning at Tonya's!
I had all sorts of grand ambitions to get things done in the office: concentrated, thinking sorts of things that are impossible with baby in tow (like starting on taxes, ick). Still, I fought my usual inclination to put my mind before my body, and went to the Y right after dropping Julian and Katrina off and had a nice little workout. I daresay I'm starting not to hate the treadmill.
At 11:00, I got the call: Katrina absolutely would not take a bottle, and was screaming her head off. Two kinds of formula, fresh and frozen breastmilk, not having it. I zoomed to Tonya's, nursed her, and went back home to make the most of my remaining 45 baby-free minutes.
This is a problem! It hasn't been an issue in the evening when we go skating, since I nurse her before we leave, then she sleeps the whole time we're gone. But during the day, if I'm to be away from her ever, at all, she needs to take a bottle. Preferably of formula, since I really hate pumping.
I tried baby-on-bottle again tonight, with a different bottle. Nothing doing.
I remember that Gabriel too stopped taking a bottle, though he was older and was eating solids by then. Fortunately, Katrina isn't all that far off from the 6 month mark. Ego compels me to keep her exclusively on breastmilk until then, just so I can say that all three kids lived on nothing but breastmilk for the first 6 months of their lives, fresh from the cow.
Katrina didn't nap well at Tonya's either, but she sure did this afternoon. I had to wake her up after 3 hours, so I could take the boys back to Tonya's for sleepover tonight, and drop a meal off at my friend Jodie's house. I keep thinking about Jodie and her preemie baby...and speaking of breastmilk, I remember that Jodie wasn't a fan of nursing, but I also remember Stacey telling me that pumping breastmilk wasn't considered optional if you had a preemie. I can't imagine having to pump if you didn't even want to breastfeed in the first place -- blah!
Inspired by Kristi, I attempted to get eye-color photos of the kids today. Kristi's three girls all have blue eyes, and Kristi does a nice analysis of the subtle differences (she's an optometrist, so has a professional perspective as well).
I failed utterly, but got a few funny face shots in the process. I don't know how to get natural-light photos of their eyes without reflections though.
Reflections weren't my biggest problem though. Julian absolutely refused to hold still, and only did after I got fed up and said, "OK, never mind, no pictures!" Then he cries and wails and says he'll hold still, not thinking that posing for pictures isn't that much fun anyway. That sort of bluffing never, ever worked on Gabriel.
A calm evening, with the boys away and baby going to bed reliably around 7pm. Lately she's been waking up once during the night, and then pretty early in the morning (6:30am) ? Not bad.
3/2/07
Yay! I'm almost done re-organizing my craft area in the office. It feels great, and functional now, having set it up according to the way I really use it: projects on one side, materials on another. Now I just have to find the time to use those materials on those projects!
I had a nice quiet morning alone with Katrina, who napped from 9:30am to 11am. That pretty much shot going anywhere until it was time to pick up the boys, and then she was falling asleep in the car and acting tired, so straight home we went after getting her brothers.
Gabriel complained yesterday that we aways go somewhere after picking him up, and that's true. Once again, I'm ultra-protective of my time "off" from kids, even with -- perhaps especially with -- three. I'm not going to waste kid-free time grocery-shopping or errands-running at Target! I'll take them all with me for stuff like that!
I realized today that I no longer brace myself for the times that they're all three home. It used to be that I'd pick up Gabriel, or both boys, then steel myself for a difficult afternoon: the boys fighting while I'm nursing baby, two-handed carrying of a miserable newborn; baby crying while I'm trying to get Julian down for a nap. But the boys are a lot better together now; Gabriel in particular has been a joy lately. And Katrina is a lot more predictable and manageable -- and carryable. If she's awake when it's time to get Julian down, she sits in my lap as I read a story to him. I almost prefer that, because I'd much rather spend her sleep time doing things that absolutely can't be done when she's awake. (Well, except that Katrina often isn't much fun to have in your lap, wriggling like a fish out of water.)
Not that I want to rush her babyhood, but sitting up by herself would make both me and Katrina very happy.
No photos today. Not even any funny kid comments, not that were sufficiently coherent to warrant repeating.
2/28/07
Not much happened today. Gabriel posed for some face shots to update his login thumbnail photo on our Macintosh computers.
Funny kid comment of the day: I forget how this got started, but lying on the bed with Gabriel looking at Katrina blowing raspberries between us, we were talking about who loves who. I commented kiddingly that kids don't have to love Moms, since we're so often the meanies who don't let kids do what they want to do. Gabriel said lightly, "Well, I love you, Mom," then, "but I love Bear even better."
Katrina went to bed at 7pm. I almost don't know what to do with myself!
2/26/07
No blog entry yesterday?! We were movin' on up -- upstairs that is. Finally, both Dave and I spent the whole night upstairs, and we had a big push of moving clothes, furniture, TV, etc upstairs.
I've been spending part of it up there anyway, after Katrina wakes me up, but this time, the night started there. I really like it up there, despite all the moving-in stuff still in the works, but to my surprise, the thing I liked best was a sense of closeness and safety having the boys closeby. Like we were all together again. That's nice.
Today we attempted to all ice-skate together. Yikes! This meant the whole family went to the ice rink in time for the public session to start at 1pm. We got there early to size rental skates for the boys and get all of us suited up.
Naturally the boys like the Zamboni best.
Well, it didn't go great actually. First I practiced for a few minutes, only to find that my bony and bruised anklebone (from Thursday's lesson) is still uselessly painful, making it very hard to really skate.
Then I brought Gabriel on the ice, and he had a hard time -- much worse than he did a year ago. But I know that improvements come about quickly, and at the end of the one lap he did, he was able to semi-skate on his own. The key was starting him off with his hands on his knees, in a secure position, then getting him to reach for my hands as I skated backward in front of him. Still, about ten minutes was all he could take.
Next, Julian. He was excited at first, and was very attentive to my instructions to put his hands on his knees. But even holding this position is pretty hard for a first time, so he quickly pooped out. Just as we were almost done, I tried the same thing I'd done with Gabriel: skate backward in front of him and hold my hands out for him, just out of reach, forcing him to reach for my hands. And then he did just fine, alternating feet and propelling himself forward.
Skating is a hard sport to start; it's not fun right away (like soccer) when you're falling all the time. And it was tough for me today: my bony anklebone was really really tender, and then I discovered that my fragile sacro-iliac joint paid a hefty price for all the bending down helping the boys.
Well, even if I never get any of my guys interested in skating, at least I have one last shot with Katrina! Speaking of who: another too-late, too-long afternoon nap for baby means she's back up, late. Guess she'll have her bath after the Oscars.
Please join me in sending positive thoughts to the Wisherd family, which in addition to Jodie, Chris and Aidan, as of today includes baby Reese, 14 weeks early. It'll be a long road for them all.
2/25/07
No skating today, but lots of talking about it. I signed Julian up for a parent-and-tot ice skating class, starting March 7! This is the same one I did with Gabriel last year, that got me wanting to take lessons myself.
Here's a crummy camera video of Gabriel at his last skating class last year:
Funny kid comment of the day: Gabriel watched that video of him skating, and said, "That's when I was, like, completely 4!"
Katrina was just darling today, though she sure needed a lot of naps. Last night her first and only wakeup was at 2:30am, after going to bed around 7pm. Yay! Then she took a good solid morning nap, and I thought I had a good 2-1/2-3 hour window of awake time. As I got ready to take her to the Y, she was fussy and crying and not smiley, and as I was about to carry her out the door, she did that baby-burrowing thing that makes you think they're going to rub their noses off. Tired already?! But who can argue with the burrow? So I took her upstairs and put her down, and after about 5 minutes of half-fussing half-sucking, she went to sleep. Hukay!
I put Katrina in the exersaucer today for a few minutes, and then kept hearing a sudden sort of yipping sound. Turns out, she was quasi-laughing at spinning a toy on the exersaucer. It was so cute I tried to quickly capture a video, but she was distracted by the camera. Still, this video gives a few examples of her giggle (?), though she was doing it a lot more before I tried to capture it (the Heisenberg effect?):
I did an unusual thing tonight: took the kids to the Y after dinner, in an attempt to make a 5:45 hip-hop class. I missed the first half of the class, and enjoyed it even though a class at a fitness center isn't really the same as a true dance class. After the class, I ran on the treadmill, this time looking at distance instead of time. Then stretched and felt great, despite my growing guilt about the time: 7:15pm. What happened to a 6:30 up-to-bedtime for baby?
Turns out, she needed it. As I was leaving the fitness room, the Childwatch was on their way to find me. Katrina was a mess, all red-masked like a raccoon again, and absolutely beside herself. She cried pitifully the whole way home. Gabriel and Julian were having a grand time, playing together to my surprise, and very cooperatively.
Going to the Y: a good thing. Timing: still working on it.
2/23/07
Dave left this morning at what my old boss used to call "O'Dark Early" for a business trip, which meant I got to play single mom with all three this morning. Not so bad, once I persuaded the boys to get dressed.
I'm so lame with their breakfasts: cold cereal and milk, and that's it. But now at least I've convinced Julian that bits of banana in his breakfast is yummy. And it makes me feel better, if nothing else.
It was a rainy day today, with breaks in the clouds resulting in moments of intense sunshine. I saw a perfect scene from the office window: the magnolia tree in full bloom, brightly lit by sun, with a dark stormy background. By the time I got outside, much of the effect was gone...or did it just look different close up?
I think this was the 4th day in a row that for at least half an hour, all three kids were asleep at the same time. Of course, I don't "put" Gabriel down for naps -- he just does it himself.
Funny kid comment of the day: Julian decided to weigh himself, and pulled out the digital scale that I use to weigh things for shipping. He first said, "Mommy, it says Zero!" then came over to me and told me in a whisper, as though he were letting me in on a secret, "it doesn't work very well on the carpet." I went back to my typing, and the a few moments later, he announced, "Mommy! I weigh 30 hours!"
Since Dave got back late from his business trip, I took the opportunity to meet my mom friends for Coffee Night after skating. I took some extra practice time, since I juuust figured out how to do back crossovers without lifting my foot to do the crossing, and wanted to solidify it (ahh, extra weight on my heels!). This is so much fun.
I had a great skating class and practice, so was in a great mood afterward to meet up with my friends. It was so nice to talk about kids and family without any kids or family actually there! Good skating, good company, good cheesecake. Nothing like a good break from kids and family to make you look forward to kids and family again.
2/22/07
No more infant seat!
Today I installed our old Britax Roundabout for Katrina. I should probably get another cover for it; it's the same old denim cover I got for Gabriel. It's so faded it's white now.
She LOVED being able to see out the windows, and play with Gabriel, and I LOVE how much easier it is to get her in and out of it. Plus now I can use my regular stroller, the same old Graco CityLite, which is a zillion times easier to control than the Snap-n-Go caddy for the infant seat. One tiny step away from babydom!
I had a chance to talk to Gabriel's teacher today, and commented that we'd entered the lottery for an alternative elementary school that has a flexible classroom format. That might suit Gabriel well, who's strong in certain things and not so much in others. She said he's definitely interested in math and science. "Art and drama? Forget it!" She also said he'd do fine in kindergarten socially, emphasizing that he sticks up for himself. "Defend" was the word she used. Gee, how big a part of kindergarten is that? Especially at Collins?
This evening, I had fun playing the Music Together CD for, and with, the boys. I showed Gabriel how to follow along the words to a song in the music book, which he loved doing. I was very surprised when he was able to read most of the words in the song "Roll Over:"
There were five in the bed
And the little one said
Roll over, Roll over
So they all rolled over
And one fell out
He has trouble with words like "there" and "they" (and apparently I do too, since I can't offhand name the parts of speech that they are). I'm pretty sure he mostly recognizes the words, and isn't really phonetically reading them. But he picked out the song titled "Kookaburra," certainly not a word you come across in typical book reading, so there's some "reading" going on. Writing on the other hand...
The boys were very cute sitting with their songbooks, turning the pages and trying to match the words to the song playing, looking at the pictures, pulling out instruments for the play-along. Katrina was tired and grouchy at the time, needing constant holding, but she was sufficiently distracted by the music and our singing, reading and some dancing (of course).
Speaking of tired Katrina, she had two naps today. The morning nap was greatly delayed by an OB appointment I had this morning, but the afternoon was was fairly normal. Still, by 5pm, she was tired. I managed to keep her up and happy until about 6:30, which I'm targeting for an up-to-bedtime. It went perfectly, she was happy in the bath, and very ready to go to sleep. Yay!
This morning I had a dream that at my annual OB appointment today, my OB told me that the strange cramping I've been feeling was because I was pregnant. AGGGH! That nightmare happened last year!! Not this time. No answers on the cramping though.
A cloudy afternoon made for a perfect photo-op, though Katrina needed a nap and wasn't quite in the mood. Not to mention, getting her brothers to cooperate is quite the challenge.
Who can blame Katrina for this worried look?
"MOM! HELP!!"
I need a professional! That goes for lots of things.
2/21/07
Yay! Two naps today for baby, one morning, one afternoon -- and a long one at that. It was delayed by a trip to Target after picking Gabriel up, but another breakthrough occurred during her nap: Katrina woke up about 30 minutes into it, much much too early, but I couldn't get upstairs right away. She made sounds like she was going to cry, fussed, sucked, fussed, sucked...then she went back to sleep. BACK to sleep! Yay! I could hear her sucking over the monitor. She's really got the hang of self-soothing it now.
As a result, she woke up at 5:00pm, instead of starting a mondo nap/bedtime then, so she actually had a normal(ish) bedtime. I can't express how ecstatic I am to have a baby who's now so easy with naps and bedtime. And, I'm very glad she's in her own room, so that Dave and I can buzz around our own room at night without disturbing her. It just wasn't fair to ask her to sleep and have the TV and lights on.
As I painstakingly go through every scrap of clothing of mine, the boys', and Katrina's (no mean feat since we were given a roomful of stuff), and arrange what little I'm trying to keep in dressers and closets, I decided I need a system for getting rid of things. Inspired once again by Kristi, I set up a bin marked Outgrown. The first time I put something on Katrina and see it really doesn't fit anymore, straight into the Outgrown bin it goes. What did I used to do, put it back into a drawer?? I guess so!
I already have numerous bags of outgrown newborn clothes to either give away to friends (the cream of the crop), take to the Smiling Frog (the brand-name stuff), or give to Goodwill (Target & Wal-Mart items). Hats, socks, receiving blankets, crib positioners, all sorts of baby stuff: GONE.
This morning I was upstairs nursing Katrina, with Julian playing downstairs, and I heard a man's voice coming up the stairs: "Hel-lo? Anyone home?" Our general contractor, here to meet a City of Sunnyvale inspector for a final inspection. GEE, a little advance notice would be nice. Too bad he didn't walk right in as I was switching sides -- a good flashing might have taught him a lesson! And this from a really good contractor.
Fun kid comment of the day: Julian this morning complained about his sodden cereal: "It's FOGGY!"
Milk-soaked cereal notwithstanding, it was overcast this morning, so I snuck in a rare photo session with Julian and Katrina. One of these days I'll get all three of them again!
Here's a cheesy camera video of Katrina's life with her brothers. She was happy practicing sitting up, but dare I turn my head with this mayhem, let alone go into the kitchen to make dinner?! No shortage of entertainment in this house.
What a different life from the first baby. For all of us.2/20/07
There is no such thing as a holiday for full-time moms. Today was very much like other days -- Dave even went into work!
But Julian went to Tonya's today, and all day. Whew.
Or was it really Julian? Dave dropped off Julian's evil twin, fussing and protesting as usual. But in the evening, Dave picked up a sweet, helpful, funny, generous, charming little boy handing valentines out. What happened?
Tonight was Spaghetti Night and Thomas Night, when the boys have to clean up the whole family room before watching their one half-hour of video a week. As per usual, they putzed around cleaning, and I had to set a time at which Thomas started. When that time is reached, I start the video and close the TV doors. They miss as much of it as the time it takes them to finish cleaning up. If they miss the entire half hour of Thomas, then they go up for bedtime without video, and the remaining toys in the family room go into the garage. They know this routine well, and miss the first part of Thomas just about every week.
Funny kid comment of the day, spoken while cleaning up the family room with Thomas playing behind closed doors, by Julian to Gabriel in what he thought was secret: "I don't like Mom!"
Last night, Katrina took what I thought would be a short nap, starting around 5pm. But she didn't wake up until **11:30** ! Was that a nap or a super-early bedtime? Answer: neither, because, not surprisingly, when she woke up, she was starving, then after nursing, she was in a fabulous, cheery, well-rested mood. I played with her a bit, gave her a bath, and wondered if I should have woken her up sooner. Mercifully, she went to bed at 12:30am, and woke up once more around 4am to nurse.
Tonight: same thing. I put her down around 5pm, when she was absolutely beside herself with eye-rubbing, swollen eyelids, a red raccoon mask around her eyes, crying, burrowing her head. I was expecting a short nap, but now, at almost 8:30pm, she's still asleep. But tonight, I'm waking her up before it's my bedtime. Come to think of it, her screaming, protesting, fighting brothers will probably take care of that during their chaotic bath-bed process.
Gabriel's pre-K was closed today, so I had him and Katrina all day. Not having to pick up Julian at 12:30pm allowed us to go to the Y after Katrina's morning nap, where I made the most of my 50 minutes. I almost looked forward to running on the treadmill. I never thought I'd say that.
Later in the afternoon, I had fun sitting down with Gabriel and playing Travel Blokus, a gift he got for his birthday (from the Engels, I believe!). It's a little more complicated than I thought, but to my surprise, he quickly understood the rules. He'd been playing with it on his own, by putting the square pieces down on the grid in various patterns, and I assured him there's no reason he couldn't keep playing with it like that. "You don't have to follow the rules if you don't want, Gabriel," I told him. He looked at me with wide, sincere eyes and said quietly, "No, I want to follow the rules." Silly me.
Chipping away at moving back in upstairs, half of which is done with one hand while I hold baby. It's going to take two carloadsful, of my substantial wagon space, to clear out the numerous bags of clothes I'm giving away. It reminds me of viciously pruning the roses yesterday, clearing out the undergrowth. Ahh.
2/19/07
WAH! I wrote so much yesterday, musings important to me, and somehow none of it got posted, or even saved. Wah wah wah!!!! I can't imagine what happened.
Well, here was yesterday's photo, anyway. Katrina hanging around outside while I hacked away at my sorry roses.
The subject was "Lockdown" because Katrina's naptimes and bedtimes have gotten so reliable. I now have a baby I can simply "put down for a nap." Yay! And lots and lots of musings about the guilt and the joy, and the guilt about the joy.
That'll teach me. I learned decades ago to save my work frequently. Tut tut.
2/18/07
OK, you all are getting tired of this baby sleep thing, but it completely rules my life.
Last night around midnight, Julian woke up crying because his covers weren't on. This woke Katrina, but Dave and I were talking about Julian and I didn't get to her right away. She cried, whimpered, cried...and went back to sleep!. Holy Cow!
She woke up later for real around 4am, nursed like her life depended on it, and went right back to sleep!!!!
But it doesn't end there. This morning, she woke up happy around 7am. I got up with her and the boys, and kept a close eye on her, knowing she'd need her solid reliable morning nap soon. And when she needed it, I put her down and she was calm. I made a split-second decision: NO PACIFIER.
She was fine! At first, that is....then she started to cry. I clenched my teeth, hanging on -- was she going to make it? Cry, cry, one scream....whimper, cry...then nothing. Nothing! She went to sleep!!! It took about 15 minutes, but she pulled it off: the morning nap without the pacifier. I was beside myself.
Not only that, but her next two naps were also sans pacifier. One nap took a little crying, the next, none. Both times, she was tired enough that she closed her eyes right away and grabbed the magic satin blanket.
By tonight, I was feeling quite confident about bedtime, and that panned out. Katrina went right to bed, was quiet for a while, then cried, then yakked, then whimpered, then to sleep. But I didn't even worry about it. No angst, no wringing my hands next to the monitor, no searing pangs of guilt. She wasn't even that stressed while crying.
Like with most things with babies, this certainly isn't the last chapter, but it does seem we've passed a big hurdle. yay!
After Katrina's second nap, she was in a great mood. Far, far better than yesterday -- today she had many happy moments, both on her own in a bouncer or playing on our laps.
I had a nice time sitting in the backyard this afternoon with Katrina and Gabriel, enjoying the unusually balmy weather. Naturally, my prime source of entertainment was taking pictures, though most of the time I was talking with Gabriel about babies and other random kid-things that popped into his mind.
Gabriel had a great time lying on the ground and looking at the sky with his little sister, reminding me of how much he loved doing that when he was her age.
(That's Gabriel at 4 months old in the tye-dye onesie.)
I never thought in a million years I'd ever say this, but right now, Gabriel is far and away the easiest of the three. That's largely because of his age, but 5-year-olds aren't famous for being cooperative, either. He could be quite difficult if he wanted to be, but right now he seems to enjoy being fun. And fun he is: cooperative, engaged, curious, playful -- utterly delightful.
And he absolutely adores his baby sister.
Ugh...the saga of Julian's tummy continues. Two changes of underpants today, one throwup into the toilet this afternoon. But he seemed and acted fine otherwise. Until bedtime. As soon as he went to bed, beewwww--aaahh. Major hurl. More laundry. What is with him?! He doesn't even act that sick, but clearly something is troubling him!
I spent a lot of time upstairs today, rearranging things, going through and getting rid of clothes, trying to figure out who gets what dressers and where they'll fit. Most of the work is in our bedroom, but there's also some in the kids' rooms also. I'm really surprised at myself about how much I love having a "nursery." I poo-poo'd the idea the first two times: after all, they outgrow the baby phase so fast, and I wasn't into the cuteness. This time, I feel pleased walking into a room that is so obviously a baby's room, and has all the baby things in it. Maybe that's because of the squalor we've been living in downstairs -- I LOVE having a real changing table, for instance, and separate laundry for baby's clothes. The crib I know is temporary, but nothing in that room is permanently baby. It will easily transition to toddler and little kid.
I think about my organized friend Kristi, the antithesis to the pack rat, and how she keeps nothing they don't use. I'm telling myself to be brutal, getting rid of clothes I like but never wear for whatever reason, and things that I love and wore so much that they're hard to part with, and things that I've never really liked but kept. I'm not a student anymore, I don't have to scrounge.
This experience living downstairs for a year with no closet and storing all my shirts and socks on five 11" wide shelves, not to mention going through a pregnancy with only one bagful of clothes, has taught me quite a lesson. I wear only a fraction of the clothes I have, and I need even less. Time to improve my signal-to-noise ratio. No junk allowed in my new closet.
2/17/07
Argh. Lousy day. I don't know what Katrina's deal is, but pretty much every waking moment today was spent crying to be held, or being held. This is as much emotionally exhausting as physically.
On top of it, Julian's poor tummy put him into Pull-Ups today. He just couldn't get to the bathroom in time, several times. But he was mortified when I suggested he put pants on over his Pull-Ups. "But Mommy, Pull-Ups are for pajamas!" Foreign Concept #1: Julian doesn't know that Pull-Ups can be worn during the daytime, even though many kids pass through a Pull-Up phase while potty-training. That's because Tonya doesn't potty-train with Pull-Ups, and neither did we. I'm sorry to say that they served their purpose today. Enough said.
After Katrina's morning nap, I was very frustrated that even at her best time of the day, I couldn't set her down without her crying. The exersaucer would buy me a few minutes, but that was it.
Going to the Y was out of the question due to Julian's tummy troubles. Staying at home was no fun, I could already feel my wrists swelling from all the baby carrying. How could I exercise, keep Julian closeby, and entertain baby all at the same time?
Answer: take them out in the double jogging stroller.
One of the few things I hate doing even more than the treadmill is actually running, especially on pavement, especially with ancient non-running sneakers, and especially pushing a stroller. But that's how desperate I was.
I jogged laboriously to Ortega Park, in search of a par course that seems to have been landscaped out with the recent upgrades to the park.
Julian wanted to get out and play in the rotunda, so I did some lunges and other exercises you can do without using the ground or any equipment.
My resentment and frustration gradually gave way to sympathy (baby was just bored, poor thing) and a slightly improved mood. My instinct to get my blood pumping, one way or another, was correct. It always picks me up.
Then we did something radical. I took the stroller straight to Kids Inc and picked up Gabriel from pre-K.
Foreign Concept #2: you can walk home?! Gabriel couldn't understand how we were going to get home, and asked me who took our car. Oh, such a product of the suburbs!! It took less time to walk home than I expected, but it's a very noisy, dangerous and unpleasant walk along busy Homestead Road, so we won't be making a habit of it.
When Katrina saw Gabriel picking him up today, the clouds parted and her face shone. The first big smiles of the day were to greet her big brother. That's not the first time that's happened, either. She really really loves Gabriel. The second she looks at me, it's all pouts and tears. (And who can blame her; I'm an unshowered frumpy mess.)
That was the good part of the day. The rest of it was pretty much spent either getting short breaks during Katrina's micro-naps, or trying to get things done in the few minutes she wouldn't cry as I was holding her, or, getting things done while holding her.
I did get to have some crying-free holding-free lunch for about 10 minutes, thanks to an adorable developmentally correct dog toy. I think that I got this for my niece, Remi, and it came back to us with thousands of other baby clothes and toys.
Tonight during dinner, I showed the boys how I'd make a behavior chart, for which they'd get a gold star for good behavior, and a black circle for not good. I had high hopes for this method. The results were surprising: very effective on Gabriel, and a miserable failure on Julian!! Well, Gabriel's been very good lately anyway. I know full well from years of painful experience that if Gabriel wanted to put his fighting suit on, no chart would stop him.
Before dinner, the boys had a grand time together, dumping out just about every box of toys they had, just to make a big pile and scatter everything. I told them they'd have to clean up everything in the family room after dinner. By now, they'd each earned a few black circles (Julian) or gold stars (Gabriel), and were used to the idea. Gabriel tackled the cleanup task eagerly, but Julian putzed around and pretended to ignore Dave. The promise of a gold star, and even seeing it on Gabriel's chart, had stopped being an incentive. The end was predictable: time ran out, Julian's toys got put into the garage (as warned numerous times), and he cried and cried about this mean "surprise" punishment, vowing to be good and clean up. Supposedly, giving a warning and carrying out the consequence consistently teaches them that you mean business. I'm still waiting.
Sleep Report: Katrina woke up last night at midnight and 4am. I nursed her both times. The first time, she cried for about 20 minutes before going back to sleep. The second time, she just went right back to sleep. I stayed upstairs after the second time nursing and got a good solid 3 hours of sleep. While to most people that would sound awful, to me it's a dream. Three continuous hours! And more than once a night!
Note that since she's upstairs now, to nurse her, I take her out of her room and into our bedroom, nurse, then bring her back. So there's really no chance to nurse to sleep, since transporting her back to her room wakes her up. Heaven forbid she rest her head on my shoulder and doze off as I'm carrying her. Not this baby.
But this afternoon of micro-snoozes was a problem. All her naps are still pacifier-induced, and this afternoon, we were back to the pacifier falling out, putting it back in, falling out, sleeping for a few minutes, crying, put it back in, etc; until I'd give up on the nap and then have to carry around a grouchy baby.
Her morning nap is the most solid and reliable; afternoon naps dicey. So which nap do I start weaning the pacifier with: the solid morning nap, in which she sucks to sleep within a minute? Or the fussy afternoon nap, which surely would result in lots of crying? Bear in mind that naps are essential to good nighttime sleep -- and other naps too!
Bedtime report: nothing short of a miracle. Bedtime routine started late, 8:30: nurse, bath, PJs, cuddle attempts (I have to go through the motions even if she doesn't relax), sing-song, lights low, put in crib, semi-swaddle. Katrina cried immediately. I put the magic blanket in her hands. I hoped for the best, went downstairs and anxiously turned on the monitor.
Nothing.
Check monitor. On, working, set correctly.
Nothing.
NOTHING!!
OK, there's something. Sucking sounds, some gurgles and noises, But NO CRYING!!!!!!
About 15 minutes later, I heard her start to fuss-cry, then cry hard, a scream or two, but 5 minutes after that, nothing.
Nothing. NOTHING! NO CRYING!!!!!!!!!!!!!
AND SHE'S ASLEEP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
We're on track! YAY BABY!
My analysis: she catches on fast (unlike her brothers), but resists (very much like one of her brothers), hard (but not as hard as said one brother).
Dollars to donuts I'll be saying that about her for years to come.
2/16/07
Today was the day! Katrina took her first nap in the crib in her room!
And just in time too; she's seriously outgrowing the Pack'n'Play bassinet.
Sleep Report: An hour and twenty minutes to go to sleep again last night, with interruptions. But, she woke up every 3 hours or so during the night. Most parents of 4-month-olds would consider this dreadful, but it's such an improvement that I'm OK with it. For now. I nursed her each time she woke up, but it wasn't clear she was hungry, and I don't want to develop a new dependency.
But, she didn't go back to sleep after nursing....disaster! Or was it? Turns out, a soft blanket with a satin edge that Sara gave us is a real hit. Instead of sucking on the pacifier, Katrina now grabs this blanket and sticks it in her face, sometimes even sucking on it. Last night at 3:30am when she wouldn't go back to sleep after nursing, I put a blanket corner in her hand, and it had almost the same effect as the pacifier: she calmed right down. Verr-ry interesting. The advice to give the baby a "lovey," or an object to get attached to, never worked with the boys. But clearly Katrina is comforted by having something familiar to hold or suck on. I'm perfectly happy with this blanket being a substitute for the pacifier.
So today, Katrina's morning nap was in the carseat, falling asleep on the way home from music class. OK, I can live with that. Her afternoon nap, I put her in the crib with as many familiar things as possible -- including the pacifier. Once she's used to the crib, and is more used to going to sleep at night without the pacifier, then out it goes for naps too.
And boy was she a happy, gooey, gurgling baby when she woke up from her 2-hour afternoon nap in her new room. I daresay she found it more interesting in there!
Just to complete the sleep report: tonight, Dave and I went to our usual skating class, then dinner. I felt bad doing this to Peggy, but Katrina was going to have to cry in her crib to sleep tonight, without the pacifier. But Peggy said she did great! It took about 25 minutes of off-and-on crying/fussing -- not screaming -- and she went to sleep. Ye-yayyy!!!
Peggy also commented that she had to let Evan, her 5-month-old, cry to sleep recently too, and he screamed for 3 hours. It struck me how little angst she had about it. Clearly, it wasn't pleasant, but she just seemed to accept that it was necessary, and preferable doing it now than when he's older. Perhaps it's from being raised in another culture (Peggy is from Mexico City), and perhaps partly because she's such a cool cucumber anyway, but she wasn't wracked by guilt about it. And she certainly isn't a detached parent, and her daughter certainly isn't distant or insecure. Geez, Miranda is one of the most confident and outspoken kids I know. I felt better knowing other moms go through this too, and some aren't that bothered by it. I still SO wish there were another way. Barring that, I SO wish this way were over!
OK, anyone else tired of the trials and tribulations of baby sleep?! It's traumatic, I'm telling you!
Julian's turn. He woke up this morning at 5:30am with another nasty nosebleed. He had a slight temperature, 100, that faded, so I took him to music class. Back at home, he was playing quietly, then called for me: "Mommm-my!" Pooped in his pants. WHAT a mess. After his nap, another slight temp. Then he pooped in his pants again while Peggy was here. (He's not just having random accidents, it's diarrhea.) Needless to say, no preschool tomorrow.
Fun kid anecdote time. I should do this every day. There's no shortage of material, after all!
In music class today, we had a substitute teacher, who was OK (though I liked Teacher Danny better!). Usually, music teachers show a picture from the music book before one song of the session, and it's not that big a part of class, or that big a deal if they don't. Gabriel would never, ever look at them. But today after music class, Julian told me that new teacher had forgotten to show pictures. I was surprised, I'd never have thought he'd notice. I certainly didn't.
Yesterday, Gabriel and Julian were putting together a puzzle....well, Julian was doing the puzzle and Gabriel took over, ordering him around. I heard Gabriel criticizing the way Julian was working: "No, those are bad qualities!" Qualities?!
As I type, Katrina is asleep upstairs in the -- dare I say it -- "nursery," while Dave and I are still sleeping downstairs. But a baby who doesn't sleep all night, and a mom suffering separation anxiety, will be the fastest motivators ever for us to get our things, and us, upstairs soon!
2/15/07
Baby's smile is back! Katrina was in a better mood today, though still far short of her 3-month-old exuberant self.
Cleaners were here this morning, so we had to skedaddle. I took Julian (who I had to pick up from Tonya's -- not supposed to be there after throwing up last night) and Katrina in the double jogging stroller, in the hopes of meeting up with the Cuperinto 2006 group at 9:45am. No sign of anyone congregating in the parking lot, so I instead took the kids on our old hike. It was so nice to be back there, though I sure missed yakking with my mom friends! We hiked every week, on and off for several years, it was quite a mainstay. Another thing I loved. But it's always nice to see the hills and trees and the trail and absorb the outdoors.
As it turns out, I ran into the 2004/2006 "group" anyway, which consisted of two moms, one who I knew and one who I'd only talked to in email. We stood chatting for a while, and I was glad to get in at least some commiseration for the baby stress. I need it!
On the tail end of the hike, a crampy feeling I've had for two days turned into gas-pain-like knives in my stomach. I hate that feeling. Every step got more and more painful. I was relieved to get to the car, but felt exhausted and wiped out and just awful.
Boom. Another temperature this afternoon. This can't be happening! 101.4. But the sharp gas pains were the worst part, and tormented me all day and night, and even as I type. It's hard to carry my high-maintenance baby around when I can't take any pressure on my tummy.
Mercifully, I got about a 45-minute nap after getting Katrina down easily with ... you guessed it, the pacifier. I just had no energy for The Fight. And it's not clear anymore I should. If she takes the pacifier to sleep, fine. But if she won't take it, then it's back to crying. Eventually I'll phase it out entirely.
Sleep report: An hour and 20 minutes of crying last night, then baby fell asleep on her own. But it didn't end there; she woke up and cried for about 10 minutes. Then around 3am, she woke up, I nursed her, but she didn't go back to sleep!!! Dreadful! Picking her up to comfort her only made it worse. I double-checked everything: clean diaper, no wet pajamas from spitup, clearly tired, lots of holding and comfort and back-rubbing. Nothing doing. Sorry, baby. I put her back down and went upstairs, leaving the crying to Dave, who can block it out much more easily.
By the time I settled into bed upstairs, I didn't hear any crying, so she'd gotten over it in about 10 minutes again. And I got a good morning's sleep, except for the interruption from the intensely sharp pains in my abdomen. Katrina slept solidly until about 8:30am, just fine.
I got thinking about Betsy's remark that it was easier to get Dylan down if she got him to bed early, like 6:30 or 7:00pm. Of course, babies don't get much more agreeable than Dylan, but it's a useful data point anyway.
So I gave Katrina an early bath, and am typing this quickly before embarking on the bedtime battle. I'm happy to say that giving her a bath will now immediately curtail a Fuss, and indeed tonight she was happy and playful in the bath. I'll have to hold onto that memory, because what's coming will be anything but happy.
Extremely painful abdomen, another temperature, high-maintenance baby...a Valentine's Day bust. Think positive: beautiful hike, lots of nice moments with baby today, and eventually I'll manage to hang on to health. I'm counting on it.
2/14/07
