8/16/08 The Good Ticket

This morning I took Julian and Katrina to my old gym (it's closer to the rental house than the Y) to gingerly see how my damaged body would take some warming up and stretching. The childcare there isn't nearly as nice as the Y's, but Katrina didn't notice. She had a great time with this adorable pink VW, and put up a major fit about abandoning it.

Then I took the younger two to a pool birthday party. It was a lovely setting, with lots of good food, a jump house, and a very nice outdoor pool. Julian had a great time playing in the jump house and swimming. Katrina was a nightmare, fussing constantly, and I whisked them away before the party's grand finale, frustrated and embarrassed. But I knew it was really my fault. Don't I know better by now? There is no life with a toddler past noon! And definitely no going two places in one morning!

But Julian, so adaptable and also very emotionally low-maintenance, spared me a well-deserved fit about missing out on birthday cake. All he said was, "I had a great time swimming, Mom!" My sweet boy. I needed that positive perspective!

Dave took the boys to a minor league baseball game tonight. Before they left, I handed the boys each their own ticket with great ceremony: "Here's your ... ticket!" Julian looked stricken. Then I realized, I had to qualify it: "It's a good ticket!" He brightened immediately.

Gabriel wouldn't oblige me with a fraternal photo, but Julian (and his tongue) came through for the photo-op.

I was in no mood to attempt taking Katrina anywhere tonight, so we passed on the game and spent the evening alone together at home. We had a great time. She played and laughed and acted adorable, and even ate dinner without too much fuss. We chased and wrestled and tickled and peek-a-boo'd and said silly things together for hours.

I tried to take some video of a game in which Katrina demonstrates her clumsy Edith Bunker-like "run," but she got distracted by a paper falling off the fridge. She doesn't know how to use fridge magnets to put it back, something I'm sure Julian did by this age. But what I really notice is how she repeats back what I say -- there's a delay, and it's hard to understand, but she's been a real parrot lately. Finally, she finds her little mouse toy and gives a chair a kiss.

Maybe it's not toddlers so much that drive me nuts. It's straddling toddler life with preschooler life and schoolkid life. When it's just one or the other, I still come down on the side of the older kids, but either one is very rewarding in its own way.

8/16/08

8/15/08 The Farmer's Market

This so un-California, but I'm really not much for farmer's markets. So far I've mostly found stuff that's more expensive than in supermarkets, it goes bad faster, and of limited quality and variety. I know great farmer's markets exist, but the few times I've been to them, I just haven't found one.

Until today, thanks to my firstborn, indirectly. And it happens to be the closest farmer's market to our house (our real house, not the rental).

See, Gabriel had a pediatrician appointment today, for an ear check and hearing test.

Which he passed fine, and there's no fluid in his ears. He had been having trouble hearing a few weeks ago, but now he's fine. We waited too long between the "WHA-AT?" and the appointment, I'm afraid. This intermittent hearing problem is a tough one to pin down. But, I'm glad he's OK for school starting next week.

Anyway, after his appointment, I took him to join the CDC kids on their walking field trip to the farmer's market. It wasn't hard to find the large group of kids all wearing red T-shirts. They were lined up, just about to walk back to the CDC to make lunch with the spoils of their visit to the market. Gabriel joined his pal Parth in line.

(I sure hope Parth is in Gabriel's first-grade class this year.)

But what a treat for me! I loved this market. Lots of fruit, flowers, cheeses, and some baked goods too (it was tough to resist), all in abundance and looking glorious and inexpensive. I bought some golden raspberries that are out of this world, for an unprecedented $2 a basket.


I'm definitely going to be going back there, and before I unwittingly spend over $15 on cherries at Whole Foods. This morning I knew $5.99 a pound was a bit expensive for cherries, but it was just a little bag...except that that little bag weighed over 2.5 lbs -- I just about swallowed a pit when I read the total cost on the receipt!

I've always liked watching Olympic swimming. I can't explain why. Ostensibly, it's boring, but I find the shorter races thrilling (not so much the 800m and above though). And now with the Phelps phenomenon, I'm totally hooked. I never fail to choke up when they play the anthem for his nth gold medal.

But I really lose it when I see Phelps' mother. They show shots of her every time he swims, in all states: nervous before a race, cheering him on, shocked, thrilled. And when he points to her in the stands after winning...oh lordy. I watched an interview with her when she talked about her boy, and the social struggles he had as a gawky kid, but how much she loved him and supported him, and it was so touching.

I have a newfound inkling of what she's experiencing: bursting with pride and love at the accomplishment of your son. When people ask me how I feel about Gabriel starting first grade, that's my answer: overwhelming, consuming pride. I look at Gabriel, this burgeoning person, this amazing unique boy who I brought into this world, and marvel at the miracle. His own accomplishment is nothing short of Olympian: growing up. And as he does, his childhood becomes part of my past, just as he is my present now, and as he embodies my future. When he was first born, I thought the depth of my new love for this tiny squishy baby would never be matched. I had no idea.

...just watched Dara Torres finish first in the 50m freestyle semi-final...haul' ass!! It's such a cliche, but I just have to say it: You go girl!

8/15/08

8/15/08 Lame Mom

Lame, not because of my back, but because I just can't keep up with what everyone needs to bring to school. Thank goodness it's easy with Katrina, but I missed one of Julian's "water days" this week, and also missed "vehicle day" when he was supposed to bring in a toy vehicle. Last week his lunch got left behind one day, and I had to make a trip to get it to him, just in time. When school starts next week and i have to keep track of all of Gabriel's obligations, I'm in big trouble.

Gabriel wants an allowance. He's discovered the "products" area of the Lego Web site, and now he likes online shopping! The actual paying for it is beyond him now, but he's all over the shopping cart, and does understand that if he has his own money, he can buy things. I'm OK with that. We're going to start him on Sunday with $3 a week. If he wants extra money, we'll give him jobs. Also, we'll take away allowance if he doesn't do his chorse, but he always has to do his chores, even if he decides he can forfeit his allowance. Not fair? Tough. This is a family, not a democracy.

I'm a lot stronger today. It's still tricky standing up after having been sitting for a while, but the more I move around, the better. I wish I had time to swim tonight. No matter, I'll have to content myself with watching other people swim (yeah, I admit it, I have Phelps-fever too).

8/15/08

8/13/08 Recovering

I went to work today, gingerly stepping around with the cane for support, but basically standing straight. It's hard to believe I ever ran 12 miles. But there was only so long I could last, so I went home early and rested, after which I was in good enough shape to make dinner.

And bonus, I got to make dinner without rushing around trying to take care of kids at the same time, as Dave did dropoff/pickups again today. It was actually fun to make dinner, and didn't take long at all! Having use of both arms was a big help, rather than having to hold myself up with one elbow and prop my body against the counter. I'm still very shaky, but should be mostly back in action tomorrow.

After dinner, bath and PJs, Julian watched some Olympics with me as I rested my back. He liked the synchronized diving! I hate the commercials though.

8/13/08

8/12/08 Barely standing

Sometimes I wish I didn't blog, 'cause I have little good to say. Today was consumed with managing this debilitating and mysterious back injury. Physical therapy, physiatrist appointment, X-ray, getting an MRI report from last May. Rest, lying down, trying to get around. Tonight I can sort of stand straight, but I'm very very weak and shaky and more dependent than ever on the cane to get around. But then I sat for about 20 minutes, reading a book with the boys, and couldn't stand straight again.

While I know this episode will heal and go away, the frightening thing is: can I work? I'm completely convinced that what predicated this was being back at work. The fact that my return to work also coincided with the first migraine in weeks isn't lost on me either. Headaches and back injuries are things I had before, but it seems my work environment aggravates them.

I don't know how I'd get through this as a single parent. Dave's taken on the brunt of child-ferrying, child-to-bed-getting and all the heavy lifting with dinner and lunch preparations, not to mention lots of gophering for me. Being essentially disabled puts a lot of strain on the rest of the family, though the kids are mostly oblivious (Julian is curiously concerned about why I'm hobbling around, but I easily put him off with a few reassuring words).

Tomorrow I will go back to work and take careful stock of the ergonomic environment there. And of the cost to our lives for my being there at all.

8/12/08

8/11/08 The cane

It's bad. I'm so bent over that I actually went to Walgreen's this morning and bought a cane. Then went to work, feeling more embarrassed than anything. But sitting for a few hours at work, and moving around as much as I did, was a disaster. It's much worse now. Dave and I met at noon, at the door place (a minor disaster with our entry door, that's another story), and then I went home to lie down. I have to minimize sitting, but lying down really minimizes what I can do. I'm typing from Dave's laptop in bed, curled up on my knees. The other problem is that my feet are buzzing badly, and I'm getting sharp shooting pains down my right leg -- sciatica. What a mess!!

Physical therapy tomorrow morning. Physiatrist appt Thursday (earliest possible). I'm going to try to go to Urgent Care tonight to be seen while it's still bad. I HATE this.

It's weird. If I had a crutch, people would smile and ask "hey, what happened to you?" A cane is a lot different. People smile politely and don't dare ask. A cane is what I need physically, but emotionally, it's devastating.

Dave did pickups and dropoffs today. Tonya gave Katrina dinner, Dave's taking the boys out. I'll take care of Katrina while they're gone, and hope upon hope that she doesn't have a stinker to change. I won't mind at all lying on the floor reading to her and playing with her though. That'll be the best part of this lousy day.

8/11/08

8/10/08 Bad, bad back

It's been building. All the sitting from work has been causing constant low-grade foot-buzzing, and sometimes, sharp shooting pains from my tricky right sacro-iliac joint. Today I went swimming, usually the safest exercise ever, but being so straight for a while in the water put a slight strain on my lower back. Usually not a big deal.

The "Zoom!" did it though -- picking up Katrina in a big sweeping motion and lifting her over my head exclaiming, "Zoom!" When she was silhouetted in the sky, I felt it -- ~zing~ -- in my lower back. I put Katrina in the car, drove home, and haven't stood up straight since.

This isn't as bad as the other times it's happened, but it still seriously hampers my life. I can't zip around the kitchen making dinner as usual, and instead have to sit and give detailed instructions to Dave. Not until we were well-committed to the usual Sunday mac'n'cheese, peas and meatballs did it occur to me: hello, pizza?

I did hobble out to snap Katrina having fun in the backyard though.


Am I healthy? I swam 1800 yards this morning without stopping, but now I can't stand up straight. The migraine persists too, lessened this evening because of lots of back-forced rest this afternoon. Well, if I have to lie down a lot because of a migraine, might as well couple it up with a back outage.

8/10/08

8/9/08 Skating afternoon

I've been free of migraines for two glorious months....maybe even nine glorious weeks. But it's back today, with a vengeance. Yesterday I felt very, very strange, irrationally tired and feeling like the top half of my head was extremely heavy. Then there was the relentless cold, feeling unable to bring my body temperature up to a normal level. And sleeping badly, restless, with lots of strange dreams.

It all came together today with a brutal headache this morning, at least a 7 out of 10. I'd forgotten how it saps my energy and will to live, depresses me and puts such weight on my ability to function. Every step of the day takes ten times the effort and motivation. It makes the last 9 weeks seem idyllic and perfect and problem-free.

I know from experience that skipping normal things for headaches, though sometimes unavoidable, never helps. So I gathered myself and fulfilled my fun goal for this weekend: take the boys ice-skating!

I hadn't seek Gabriel skate since his week of ice-skating camp, and Julian hasn't skated in months. So it was a bit of a new thing for me to see both boys.

But what fun! It took Julian one time around the rink to remember, and after that, it all came back. Including being able to get up from a fall himself, which is a huge back-saver for me. Gabriel is well past being a rickety first-timer, and showed me his new skills of dips and glides and stops.

Gabriel demonstrates dips:


Gabriel skating fast:


The boys skating together:


I had such a great time with them. This is what I really love about being a mom, doing things with them together, watching them interact, talking excitedly about it together later. I feel like such a "boy-mom" when I'm doing something fun alone with them, and remind myself that Katrina will only enhance the mix...someday.

Gabriel had his second piano lesson this morning, with a second teacher. Already?? Well, we needed a teacher closer by, and this was the first teacher who'd been recommended to us. It went really well, and Gabriel seemed to enjoy it, though he later said he liked the first teacher better. Still, 9am Saturdays are now committed.

I watched some of the Olympics tonight with a clean pajama'd and calm Katrina all cuddled up on my lap -- her part of the cuddle moreso from gravity than nature -- but still, she was cheerful and interactive and very sweet. After she went to bed, Julian took her place, and me and my guys watched the men's gymnastics together. This is fun, I like telling them about the different countries and what little I know about the various sports. BMX biking airs the 16th, that one we're not going to miss!

8/9/08

8/8/08 The Bench

After going to Trader Joe's twice and spending $150 on groceries today, we went out to dinner.

I just couldn't gather myself to cook tonight. I'd realized today that we've hardly done any take-out, restaurants or freezer foods, and now I'm working and getting home around 5:30pm. What's wrong with this picture? It's not like I'm cooking anything wonderful or new either.

I also can't make anything that requires more than 20 minutes of oven time. Prep, oven time, cool-down time and serving time puts dinner well past 7pm, and that just doesn't work anymore. Maybe I could sneak in a 40-minute lasagna if I had it ready to go right into the oven, but that would require preparation on weekends. Somehow, I don't see that happening.

I ran into an old friend at the gym today. She works full-time and has two children (6 and 4), so I asked her how she deals with walking in the door in the evening and making dinner. She said her kids are a lot easier to deal with now that she doesn't let them watch TV during the week anymore. That's interesting! But, her situation doesn't apply to mine anyway -- if all I had to deal with were my 6-year-old and 4-year-old, it'd be a different world. It's the demanding toddler that makes it hard.

But such a cute one! Katrina was all charm today (mostly, see below). And she was so good when we went out. Somehow before I got to the table, she'd already been settled in on a bench by the helpful waitress, without even so much as a booster. I was apprehensive about this arrangement, but she was really really good and mostly sat, chatted, and devoured bowl after bowl of fried rice.

The boys were really good too. This was one of the most successful outings we've had since...well, ever.

Part of the reason we went out was because the second we got home, even before we walked in the door, Katrina threw a full-on flailing screaming tantrum. I have no idea what set her off, but she was determined to keep it going. Every effort I made to distract her was met with contempt and a fresh bout of angry screeches. Finally, I finally hit upon something too irresistible to keep up the show: searching for strawberries in our little strawberry patch. I was able to harvest a few handfuls with my now-cooperative helper holding a little pail. Her attitude shift was immediate and drastic, and then she was all smiles, happy chitter-chatter and full-on adorable. But I was out of energy and time to make dinner by then. Such ups and downs: the low of a complete fit, the high of a small child delighting in finding strawberries.

As much as I complain, I really do love the little critter. I think about her all the time, with pride and affection, even about her willful episodes (otherwise known as "tantrums"). The fact that her age and stage of life are not my favorites are not her fault.

The boys, on the other hand, are at a phase of life I really like, especially Gabriel's. I'm in my element with a 6-year-old boy. Arguably a 4-year-old boy, at least ours, isn't anyone's element, but Julian's annoying traits have been slowly fading lately.

They make driving down a busy expressway fun when they see a green light up ahead, and cheer me on to make the light. "Go Mom GO!" then, "Yayyyyy!!!" when I make the green. Katrina joins in the clamor, and they've all succeeded in turning the most mundane chore of the day into genuine fun. This is what's great about kids.

8/8/08 (cool date!)

8/7/08 Big Boys

Sit down for this one: this morning, Gabriel and Julian got up, made their beds, got themselves dressed, got themselves breakfast, cleaned up breakfast (!), got their shoes on, and were completely ready to go before we were even out of our bedroom!!!! They won't offer any more explanation for this besides Julian admitting, "It was Gabriel's idea!" Amazing.

On the way to pick Gabriel up today, Katrina revealed another word I didn't know she knew: "Peece Tow!" Believe it or not, that means "police car." She was pointing to a Sheriff who'd pulled over a car on the road where Gabriel's CDC is. I didn't think she'd recognize the flashing lights, but she did.

As I often do, I left Julian and Katrina in the car while I zipped in to get Gabriel. Eeps! Sounds bad, but really, I always lower all the windows, and leave the keys in the car so the windows can be operated and the car moved if need be. Really, the odds of someone stealing my car out of a school parking lot with two small children in it are far, far less than one of them getting injured in the parking lot as I try to herd them through the minivan parade. No need to call the cops on me.

Especially since one was right there to take up your cause anyway.

When I emerged with Gabriel, Katrina's "peece tow" was now next to my car, with the concerned young Sheriff interrogating Julian. Oh great. Fortunately, Julian had answered "inside there!" rather than "I don't know, she's gone" as I'd feared. And I really was gone for less than two minutes. He seemed to understand as I hastily explained my safety (yes, and convenience) tradeoff. Julian said he sure hoped the policeman gave me a good ticket instead of a bad ticket.

Driving home, Gabriel asked an accidentally relevant question: "Is jail timeout for grownups?" The context wasn't my encounter with the fuzz, but rather, the Detroit mayor's incarceration today. Good thing my kids are up on current events!

What are the odds for a repeat of this morning's domestic help? I give it Julian's favorite odds: 10,000 to 1! But I'm delighted they took such fun in this today.

8/7/08

8/6/08 Macaroni and Baloney

I'm ruining my children. I play the silliest music for them. Somehow I joked around with them about "macaroni and baloney," part of a line from the song Hot Lunch from the soundtrack of the movie Fame. Really marginal quality music. Now I've got my Fame CD in the car and we're playing that all the time, and now they're singing "macaroni and baloney..." all the time. "If it's yellow then it's Jello, if it's blue, then it's stew...." Oh brother!

8/6/08

8/5/08 National Night Out

Our neighborhood has an association that participated in the National Night Out tonight. A firetruck stopped by (one of about 12 stops for them tonight), and we got treated to a little concert by, of all things, a ukelele club. Turns out, two neighbors across the street belong to a ukelele club, which treated us to a performance! Gabriel was excited to see this and brought out our ukelele too, but it wasn't really the right forum for a jam session.

That's a city Fireman joining in the hula (behind the guy in the red jacket).

We met more neighbors tonight too, a mixture of empty-nesters who've lived here for decades, and young families. Boy, I'm going to be sad to leave this neighborhood, I really like it here!

That said, I'm starting to get tired of this actual house. We truly have nothing to complain about, but I do miss our insulated rooms, a larger office, more spacious bathrooms, having two stories, and especially, a place where I can set up my scrapbooking.

Back to work today. An auspicious start...I attended what I thought would be an informational meeting, and was introduced to someone I didn't know. All in the room were surprised (shocked?) that I didn't know a top-level VP. He even said, "you've never seen my picture?" Uh, no, if I'm going to look at pictures of celebrities, it'll be George Clooney.

It turned out to be a feather-stroking meeting about cancelling a major engineering project and deciding to limp along the old stuff for a while longer. They said they needed a network architect to decide what the network should do, and for business development to decide what the company wants to be -- but the big word missing to me was 'customer'. What do they want? "I've never written a business plan," I piped up, "but I'd think the first three words should be 'Our customers want...'"

Well, if I was at all worried about them insisting on me hiring on as a full-time employee, I think I took care of that today!

It's so darned cold and dark in that office. I took a walk today, just to get out, and thought sadly about Katrina. I missed her, and felt like crying as I walked along a busy noisy avenue in an industrial area, thinking of her giggling with glee as she tries to run in circles, her fluffy blonde hair bouncing behind her. What a contrast to dingy office life.

But this is still too good an opportunity to pass up, for now. I've got to cut the umbilical cord eventually, but as overloaded as we are with remodeling, I need to coast, even unhappily, for now. And when our little bunch are all a little older, and we're past the tyranny of toddlerhood, then I'll be braver about breaking out on my own, somehow. Or fed up with office life.

It took me 50 minutes to drop everyone off this morning and get to work, and strangely over an hour to pick everyone up and get home. With the three pickup locations being roughly equidistant, it doesn't seem as druderous though. Let's see if I still feel that way in another few weeks!

8/5/08

First Piano Lesson!

Dave reminded me that I left out a major event last Saturday. Somehow upstaged by the county fair, and having no photos, I forgot to write about Gabriel's first private piano lesson! (How could I do that to Bonne Maman?)

Dave took him to a teacher who'd been referred by another teacher who'd been referred to us by a longtime student, but had no openings. Dave first talked to the potential teacher on the phone, explaining that we'd like flexibility in the lessons -- still structure and basics, but to let Gabriel's own musical interest drive the style of music he learns. (I think back to taking classical piano lessons in the 7th grade after teaching myself the entire Maple Leaf Rag....I think I'd have done a lot better if my teacher had been amenable to Scott Joplin over Bartok.)

So, a half-hour lesson was scheduled for last Saturday, and Gabriel was excited about it. First, the teacher asked him to play whatever he wanted, and he played "American Patrol" -- a Glenn Miller big-band tune! Not usually a kid's first choice. Dave said she was immediately impressed not that he could play it, but rather by how much of it he knew. Then "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star," both hands, and several verses. Same thing -- pretty advanced for a 6-year-old who's had virtually no instruction and has been playing well under a year. She worked with him to show him some basic technique, and took a moment to catch Dave's eye and say emphatically, "He works hard!" Arguably that's the most important thing.

Overall it went really, really well, though a half-hour seems to be his limit. Leave 'em wanting more, a basic tenet of showbiz, right?

So we're going to continue the lessons. Scheduling will be a challenge, but she's going to try to squeeze him in nearby, as she genuinely felt his ability is exceptional.

Dogged pursuit or raw talent? Hard to say, but it doesn't really matter. Gabriel's interest in music is no passing phase. Even if piano lessons don't work out, he can take other music lessons, or try again later. He might not like routine directed practice, for instance, and that's fine too (though we won't pay for lessons in that case). I really feel that we should encourage music, but not force it down his throat either. If it's in him, it'll come out in its own way. Private piano lessons is a good start, but it's by no means the end.

One wonderful thing that's coming out of this is that Dave finds himself poking around on the keys himself too. "It's ironic," he observed, "that what stopped me playing myself is what's getting me to start again." And that "what" is Gabriel.

8/4/08 The New Week

Gabriel saw a "Baby on Board" sign in a car window today and asked why that was there. I explained that it was so other people know there's a baby in the car. He said "Oh," then paused, and asked, "What if they don't know?"

He couldn't understand why I was laughing for 5 minutes. I've never liked those signs, even before I was a parent, and perhaps even moreso now that I am one. Are others expected to drive extra-carefully around a car that might have a baby in it? Aside from the impracticality and futility, is a baby's life any more important than anyone else's? Does a mother's, grandfather's, dear friend's, teenage child's, husband's life deserve any less regard than a baby's? Sure, I'd want other drivers to take care when I had a baby in my car, but I want that just as much now that my babies aren't babies anymore. I know, I know, it's just a silly sign with a cute alliteration, but they've always bugged me a little.

It took "only" 45 minutes to drop everyone off today, and that was with first-time dropoffs, picking up things, dropping off things. Julian's new school was ready for him, with a spot at the table, a cubby, his own teacher. He was excited to bring his new pink lunchsack (fortunately we've recovered from fraternal mockery), and went in happily with his new teacher.

When I picked him up, he was happily playing out back in the very nice outdoor play area.

I talked at length with his teacher -- the same person I dropped him off with -- and she said he did great. No crying for Mommy, he listened and played well with other kids, and adapted immediately. I didn't expect any problems, but I was relieved and proud to hear how well he'd done anyway.

They did a little music class today, and she said she thought he wasn't getting anything out of it, since he was immobile during the music, but afterward he asked for more, and sang the songs to himself. Just like Julian!

Julian's teacher added with incredulity, "He can read!" They had some exercise that involved looking at pictures in books that also had some writing, and Julian misunderstood and went ahead and read the words aloud. I was really happy that he's getting enough attention that she noticed.

(My pride is a little tempered with self-consciousness about being mistaken for a parent who feels it's important for their preschooler to "get ahead," so I rushed to explain that we don't have a tutor or do enrichment programs or show him flashcards or anything. Then it just sounds like I'm bragging. But it's true -- he's just really interested in reading, and much of the credit goes to Dave, who reads to them every night, always books within their reach to read too. And Julian has the older brother to model after.)

Anyway, it was a smashing success. I'm thrilled with Julian's new place. And very, very proud of my well-adjusted, charming, happy little boy.

I don't know if Katrina's making up for the stomach-flu episode, but all of a sudden, we just can't feed her enough. She's still VERY opinionated about what the food is, but for things she likes, she's ravenous. Breakfast yesterday was a banana, three bowls of cereal, then two pancakes.

After her dinner and during ours, she played fiercely with this little castle toy with balls that fit into the castle towers. She was at this for no less than a solid half-hour, giggling and yakking constantly.


She's been a real chatty-Katty lately; Tonya says she talks all day long.

Gabriel was back at the CDC today, reunited with his pal Parth. Unfortunately, the first thing he said to me when I picked him up was, "Mom, I am really having trouble hearing!" During an "I Spy" game he had to ask, "WHA-AT?" repeatedly. We have an appointment scheduled next week for him, but I'm going to try to move it up.

I had a nice run yesterday, despite my heightened aversion to yellowjackets, which thankfully were not in sight at all. But darnit, my feet are buzzing tonight. This can only get worse when I go back to work tomorrow.

8/4/08

8/3/08 "Fix it!"

This is Katrina's latest phrase: "fix it!" This applies to numerous things: a stuck stroller, two train cars that need to be coupled, a cup that needs to be refilled. So far it's been uttered without the characteristic demanding screech, but she's still pretty insistent when she says it.

Another new phrase: "thank you!" Little moments like that make you feel like you're doing something right.

Another playdate today with Kirin, the son of one of Dave's coworker's (Uday). Kirin lives in Ohio with his mother, but spends summers here with his Dad. They'd planned to go BMXing, but Kirin broke his arm two weeks ago in a soccer daycamp. That didn't prevent all sorts of fun today at a large nearby park -- the boys brought their bicycles and had a great time riding around, and climbing around some rock and concrete climbing structures.


Kirin's grandfather was there too, and gave Julian a helping hand. Julian seemed to need this only when there was a grownup around to offer.


Uday (Kirin's Dad) brought his dog Jackson, in whom Katrina had moderate interest when she wasn't pushing the stroller around. No fear of the big dog at all.



I've been a baking fiend lately, determined not to waste so much as one piece of fruit that's been raining in from my split CSA subscription. Uday, his father, and five kids (Kirin, Rahul, Kirin's 5-year-old cousin, and our three), enjoyed some plum mince streusel bars.


Katrina played a little on the climbing structures, under Dad's careful guidance, but they were way beyond her ability and she'd get stuck and cry. Not brave and not athletic -- I guess that's a good combination. She'll have to fall back on cuteness.


Watching brothers play frisbee. Julian, once again, the best thrower.


Uday's fiance is also a pretty blonde who grew up the youngest of three with two older brothers. She wasn't there today, but I pick her brain about the experience whenever I see her!

Big week coming up. Julian starts a new preschool tomorrow, and I start...w_o_r_k on Tuesday. Boom.

8/3/08

8/2/08 The County Fair

I took the kids to the last day of a county fair this morning. It's greatly scaled back because of lack of county funding (ironically), but it was plenty big for us. And does fun get any more all-American or clean than this? Figuratively speaking, that is, since county fairs involve a lot of livestock. Very clean livestock.

First, a petting zoo (sort of), run by some very aggressive little girls who kept a production line moving quickly. "Take a seat, put a towel on your lap, and we'll bring a rabbit or chicken." The boys both held the fluffiest bunnies you've ever seen. Katrina was more interested in the chickens.




Gabriel was shocked to see that ducks aren't actually yellow.


Funny, we were just talking last night about where ham comes from!


The boys already knew where this fellow was headed.


A jump house and pedal John Deere tractors were big attraction for the kids (well, boys, I didn't attempt Katrina in the jump house). For me, standing around in blazing sun while they played on essentially toddler toys that were too big for my actual toddler wasn't so much fun. But I wanted to earn my Good Mom stripes today to make up for next week, so went along with it.

We walked through a building that showed off kids' matchbox and doll collections, winning baked goods and tablescapes and all sorts of stuff I never knew county fairs were for. It strikes me as a fading but charming anachronism, from a time long before people could compare notes via the Internet.

This was overall a lot of fun, though I'll enjoy these outings a whole lot more when I don't have a grumpy toddler and a stroller in tow. Katrina was really a pain, not letting us stop when and where and for long we wanted, demanding that the stroller keep moving and refusing to walk. I have friends who love doing this sort of thing with their toddlers, but I am so done with the stroller life.

(In fact, Katrina fell asleep in the car moments before arriving back home at 12:30, and that pretty much killed her nap for the day, making her high-maintenance and demanding this afternoon. Every time I think I'm being too uptight about protecting toddler nap, this sort of thing happens.)

In between dropping everything at any moment to go deal with a Katrina-screech-fuss, I started working on a pear mince streusel recipe that calls for snipped raisins. Luckily, I have great help!

I'm delighted to have found a great outlet for my baking experimentation: the construction crew at our jobsite. I'm going to bring them something every Friday when we have our weekly meetings there. Perfect!

8/2/08

8/1/08 The start of a new season

It's August now! Time to start thinking about Halloween!! urrrgggh....

As I'm struggling with the ickiest details of updating finances (Quicken bugs and reverse stock splits and unidentified securities I never signed up for), Julian's playing on the Lego Web site next to me.

(a foul odor wafts from down low....)

Julian: "I farted!"

Me: "Yes, I know..."

Julian: "I like farting!"

Well, who am I to argue with bodily pleasures of life? He probably likes the taste of boogers too.

Daycamps are done. Only disaster was that I didn't know about Gabriel's one swim day during ice skating camp, so he had to sit out the pool that day. He didn't even tell me, I had to ask him, and he didn't seem to mind playing games instead of swimming. My guilt is deep, falling short only of being late the last day of school. Still, I'm thrilled that Gabriel liked ice-skating camp so much -- I think his enthusiasm for it exceeded Lego Engineering, and that's saying a lot!

Goodbyes for Julian at daycamp are a grand affair. Seems everyone wants to give him a big hug, and he wants to do the same. He's so affable and enthusiastic, high-fiving all his new counselor friends, energetically hugging and playing with them. He absolutely loved daycamp, and all indications are that they really loved him too.

A candid shot from yesterday, Julian holding hands and playing with a camp counselor, until he spotted me.


Today Julian had a swim day (this one I knew about), so I sent him to camp with his new monogrammed knapsack from Land's End. It's a little big for him.



8/31/08

7/31/08 Bug up my butt

Oww! I got stung by a yellowjacket today, smack dab on the tuckus! Running at Rancho this evening, after dropping off the boys at Tonya's for a sleepover. I was moving and had heavy shorts and light undershorts on, and the damn thing got me right through those two layers. I hit it, saw it squirming on the ground, then ran back just to stomp it to death. But it left its mark, literally, in the form of a huge welt and a very painful spot on my left cheek. This is the third time this month I've been stung by a yellowjacket -- enough already!

7/31/08

7/30/08 The Procrastination

Finally, this afternoon I tackled my still-half-packed office. It really gets old tripping over boxes. The unpacking is so stale now I don't even remember what's missing, and it's getting to the point that I don't even recognize some things in the boxes.

Still, setting up an S-corporation to become my own contracting business is such a daunting pain, and so not forefront of my mind right now, that I found a very productive way to avoid the ugly job. Going through boxes of office junk is also an ugly job, but this afternoon, it was the lesser of two ugly evils. We can almost walk in here now!

Besides, I could chat with Julian while he played on the Lego Web site on our "extra" Mac computer. I like my afternoons alone with him, he's so different when there's no older brother around to impress. Sometimes I just look at him when he doesn't notice, drinking in his deep round eyes, a fascinating odd dark grayish color, marvelling at his exquisite mouth framed by his square pudgy little-boy cheeks. I'm completely aware that the beauty I see in him is that special sort that mothers experience when looking at their children, and that only deepens my joy and awe. He is such a beautiful child and I revel in that.

Moments like these only come when I'm one-on-one with any of them, and then I'm almost taken aback by the force of my love for them. It's much easier to feel that when I'm not constantly instructing, "Turn that down! Get that out of the kitchen! Put your lunch away please! LEAVE HER ALONE!!!!" as is instantly the case when the siblings are reunited.

I snapped a candid -- almost -- shot of Gabriel at daycamp just as he noticed me. How sweet, sitting next to his longtime pal Gina.


Birthdays today: my brother -- and brother-in-law! Welcome to the Dark Side!

7/30/08

7/29/08 Park pals

We went to a park this evening after daycamps and daycare, making for a hectic late afternoon, but a fun evening.

It's nice when kids help each other push on swings instead of making grownups do it! Gabriel ran into his kindergarten class pal, Anushka, and roped her into pushing. Meantime, Julian pushed Lance.

But no one got higher than Gina when she pumped herself. I thought she was going to flip around the top bar of the swings! That girl has no fear.

Unlike my girl, who's overall hesitant and cautious when it comes to putting her pretty little rear end in danger. But to my surprise, she went down this slide herself numerous times, clapping and saying "whee!" Dylan joined in the fun too.


Let's do that again!


7/29/08