Sunday, June 20, 2010

6/20/2010 Dad's Day

I was pretty lame today about Father's Day. I just can't seem to make weekends productive, as I'm always so tired from the week I'm overwhelmed by the need -- and opportunity -- to nap. And also compelled to do some form of exercise on the weekend, as it's so limited during the week.

So while I was out running, Dave put the kids to bed and we missed our chance to do a little Dad's Day celebration and gifts. At least I made Dave's favorite breakfast, and cleaned up while Dave pulled out an electronics kit he's had stowed in a closet for a while. Not surprisingly, this kept Gabriel focused all day, though he did take breaks to follow Dave around and pepper him with questions about voltage regulators and such.

Katrina has been on a tantrum tear lately, one of her worst. They are triggered by things so trivial we can't even remember what started them, and she works herself into a completely inconsolable state, often ending up screaming at the top of her lungs for over half an hour.

But in the end, and along the way, Dave does feel this is all worth it. It's more than he signed up for, and often pushes him out of his "core competencies" and comfort zones, but being a Dad is an inextricable part of life now.

My only great sadness about today is that I can't call my own Dad and hear his joy and delight at my voice, talk about life and people and motivations and general philosophy, listen to him spit in fury at the hell Republicans hath wrought upon the earth, hear him laugh heartily at some clever comment from me, and somehow talking to him brought out my most clever comments if I have any at all. My Dad is still there, but his brain and spirit have been disconnected from language and memory, so I miss him just the same as if he weren't there.

So I wasn't the best wife or mother today, but that's all part of being family.


No comments: