Monday, October 29, 2012

10/29/12 The weekend

Whew...almost over. My 2nd weekend alone without my children. I'm amazed how much I miss them.

I was always really low on the "on" scale as compared to most moms....I never do much in the way of sitting and focusing my attention on them. It's more like I miss just having them around -- grouching at them not getting dressed, intervening in the boys' numerous fights, sprinting to rescue Katrina from some-or-other torture from her brothers...and sometimes hearing them happily play, and occasionally even involving myself in it. But there's so much ambient amusement and interaction from us just being together too, and I so miss that.

On the surface, this weekend-to-myself thing seems like what most moms are anxious for. I get to do things in big blocks of time, I have lots of time to myself, peace and quiet -- things most moms can only dream of. And indeed, I make the most of it -- I've always been fine being alone.

But I'm sure looking forward to "my" weekend. Sometimes it feels like the kids are just visitors, and like I'm just a half-time mom.

I wonder, do they miss me? I doubt it, kids are much more focused on themselves, and they're not away from me long enough to really feel it. I don't want them to feel like they miss their mother, that's a big deal for a kid. But I sure miss them.

I know we'll all adjust to this new on-and-off schedule, but so far it's a much tough adjustment for me than I expected.


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